Again, I think was everyone's point.

Exactly. Remember, all we can analyze is what's been presented to us ;)

And there's a big difference between saying, "Sorry, stuff happened a while ago and there's nothing I can do about it," and "My chapter is better than yours."

The OP can do what she wants. Perhaps he's a perfect guy in every other way, but she doesn't make it sound that way. I find that when people complain about one thing regarding their significant other to strangers online, there are much deeper issues there. Just my experience.

Based on Greek stuff.


I see the former as bullshit and the latter as to the point.

Absolutely I have. In fact, I recommend it, but our dates didn't consist of solely hanging out with his social circle while he ignored me while shotgunning beers with his friends. There's his time, my time, and the all important our time. My first impression of this thread was who gives a rat's behind if your chapters are mixing, but the more she's told us about him the more he sounds like he's all about him.
YMMV.

Actually I have come to the conclusion that he is the guy who got Penny In Trouble in Dirty Dancing.

The things he's said would be just as douchey were "friends" or "family" substituted for "fraternity brothers." It's not a Greek thing, it's adouche thing.

A person is rarely douchy in limited context. While no, this one scenario shouldn't necessarily be a deal breaker, my guess is it started her thinking about who this guy really is.

A chapter not wanting to mix with another chapter doesn't automatically = our chapter is better than yours. If this guy thinks that, then he's an idiot.

I guess we'll agree to disagree.

Exactly. Dating in college doesn't have to consist of fancy dinners and expensive gifts, but a party at the fraternity house isn't a date. It's a party. I dated fraternity men while in school, and we spent time with our friends, but we also had alone time, which wasn't only in the time after a party was over.

Precisely.

She also sounds all about him which is why she cared how he felt about her chapter. I don't completely blame him for that. He may be less about himself if she let him know she has better things to do. They might even have a better relationship. Show me a douchebag asshole and I will show you someone who just hasn't met the "wrong one".




/The relationship thread

Not automatically but it is usually around the corner. If he had broadly said they didn't want to do a social with her chapter the OP probably would've kept saying "why...why...but why...explain...we are a good chapter...tell me what happened...what's wrong."

Is he really an idiot for thinking that? LOL. GLO cultures vary but there are GLO members who believe certain chapters leave a lot to be desired. These GLO members aren't automatically idiots based on this belief.

If someone thinks they are too good for my friends, that's definetly a deal breaker for me! Maybe she isn't the type of person who cares about "tiers" and doesn't want to be with someone who does. The context here is greek life but the "tier" people can be found in every walk of life.

He's not an idiot for thinking it, he's an idiot for saying it. If I say my mom is a fashion impaired fruitcake that's one thing...if my boyfriend of a few months says it that's another.

He should've kept his thoughts to himself. That makes sense. I'm not being sarcastic.

Or he could be a "gentleman" and say "your mother is quite nice and she has a different style of dress that only lends itself to those who understand her inability to grasp fashion." :) I'm being sarcastic.

Winterstar, I don't know the size of the OP's chapter but unless the chapter is relatively small (like some of ours are), the OP isn't necessarily friends (beyond close acquaintances) with everyone in the chapter. Are the chapter members the OP's only friends? If the OP has other friends with whom the boyfriend gets along quite well, I see no problem with him disliking her chapter sisters. Because, again, I hope this Greek thing is only a microcosm of their relationship.

The point is that he should be able to show some basic respect for something that is important to her. It's not different from my boyfriend finding out I love underwater basket weaving and telling me that it's dumb, instead of just asking a few polite questions and being supportive of my time spent weaving baskets.

This.

I don't think that's the point at all. I think that's what some GCers got from the OP's story. I interpreted the story differently. Of course, neither interpretation is necessarily correct since only the OP and the boyfriend know what's going on.

The story kind of started out with one issue, and ended on another, probably causing most of the confusion.

And yes to the bold.