Good thing that she doesn't need one for that group!

Aaaand yet another daughter now knows that her relative is a perp. I wasn't going to tell her but...

I'm so glad I had something positive to contribute to this thread...:D

Except even a perp could get away with this. She just says "sure, send me your stuff." The PNM would then never know that she didn't actually write/send in the rec. Hopefully she hasn't already done that to unsuspecting PNMs.

That's been my biggest worry all along. She isn't flashing paraphernalia, just spreading the word that she's a DEF. This could definitely affect some girls' recruitments.

Another reason to go ahead and register with your local alumnae panhellenic, even if you think you've got all your rec bases covered.

Hey - do you know any DEFs who would be in a position to "out" her?

Except didn't carnation say that her daughter didn't need this rec? So no harm to the daughter, and if the perp has an ounce of shame, she should be embarrassed as all get out. She knows carnation knows that she isn't DEF.

So, what happened??? The suspense is killing me!

This makes me think of the girl from my high school class who was trying to tell everybody she was 3 or 4 years younger than she is. Now, this woman was born here, grew up here, and has never lived anywhere else. People here have literally known her all her life.
Who did she think she was fooling??:rolleyes:

This is the same woman who, a few years later, claimed she "didn't remember" being homecoming queen. I may forget my name one day, or even forget to eat, but I doubt that I'd forget I had been homecoming queen!:p

There's a woman I used to do alumni volunteer work--who does not want to admit the year she graduated from college. While we all wear nametags and are listed in programs with Munchkin03, Class of 2003, she makes it clear that her "Class of" should never be listed.

...and then she wonders why she's not tapped for Big Roles in our alumni association, especially the women's leadership roles.

We have one like that here. This is a successful woman but here she is in the town she was born and raised in, telling people that she was a Rockette and other major but similar lies. She was, come to think of it, one of the Perp's best high school friends, so my husband knows this woman well and he throws up when he hears her spout another whopper.

I'm not having any luck getting my daughters to out the Perp. They don't want to hurt her feelings because she's "nice"; she's throwing a shower for one of my girls today. Sigghhh.....

I wish I could link to AGD Jeannie Robertson's "Grandma Freddie's Trip to the Holy Land" - it is very topical :D.

:eek:

So, a family bridal shower today, full of Greeks. The only non-Greeks were my mother-in-law and D. D was sitting next to a family member who's actually a DEF. I kept thinking, "I ought to say something and clear this up! Or ask something!" and the best I could come up with (because I was trying not to start a rumble) was to say to the real DEF, "Remember your first shower? It was so gorgeous, you wore your pearled DEF pin with that ivory dress!" while pointedly looking at D.

She only stared straight ahead.

At this point, I would have liked to go for the jugular and ask D where *her* pin was but my mother-in-law never would have recovered.

Sighhh....

Drama, drama. Again, why don't you take her aside privately and ask what is up in a non-aggressive way?

Carnation, you have much more self restraint than me. I have called someone out in a similar situation. This perp turned in her pin and terminated her membership in her chapter. At a social gathering, this perp was bragging about being an XY in front of soon to be graduates who I knew were going to ask for recs since they had already asked me for them. I casually made an off-hand remark to her about not knowing XY allowed those who terminated themselves still claim membership since Sigma Kappa does not. She has stopped mentioning her affiliation with XY.

Actually, I don't always have self-restraint! If this were not a close family situation, I'd jump right in. There are a few people who would think I was terrible if I hurt her feelings. They're not Greek so they don't get it. (Although my husband isn't Greek and he does get it.)

I was hoping that some of the people who first came up and commented on her DEF membership a couple of years ago would have said something to her by now. I mean, one is a DEF!

Those of you who know me IRL are probably surprised that I haven't fried her. I am too. And if I do, I'll never hear the end of, "Why couldn't you just play along? Why did you feel you had to expose her?"