Well bless her heart!

@ thelovelyone's tale
 

:eek: and :mad: and finally :rolleyes: at the whole thing.

But back to :eek: , then :mad:, and a little more :rolleyes:....before starting the whole nasty cycle again.

Me and a friend (both black) were going to lunch at a Chinese restaurant. In the door way there was a tank filled with crabs. Being that I don't eat crab I turned to the hostess and asked her what kind of crabs they were and what parts do people normally eat. She states "You know my people we eat the whole thing, like every thing but you know you people......"
and the conversation was done because my friend walked out on her and I followed.

LOL...maybe she meant nonChinese people. Do you think she was going to say something about only eating crab legs?

I, and many other blacks, come from coastal families of crab boilers and crab feasters. We buy crabs by the barrels or buckets and eat everything except the "dead man's meat" and the eggs. Some people eat the dead man's meat and eggs (yuck!).

May I ask where you are from (your spelling of the word Negro)?

Actually that was my interpretation--that she meant non-Chinese people. Oh, and I only eat the legs - lol.

That's the vibe I got as well, but it's the "you people" I was hung up on. I might not have walked out, but she would've gotten the "WTF" face.

I aint buying it. She selling wolf tickets because she is old enough and yet young enough to know that is not appropriate.

Him: "In America, it is the law that in an emergency, ie a fire, you must save children, then women, dogs, and men last. We are less important than dogs."
My response: "Well, ofcourse your more important than a dog!"
Him: "Ask any police officer and they will tell you that dogs and more important than men. I speak to intelligent people so don't talk to me about this any more. Ask someone else. Intelligent people know that in America, dogs are more important than men."

I think I understand what the gentleman was trying to say but instead of communicating with me and making his point or expressing his frustration, he insulted me!!!

Perhaps it is the case that able bodied people who are not incapacitated are expected to need less direct assistance once the emergency people get there. Able bodied and not incapacitated men tend to be physically stronger than children, women, and pets (which usually aren't saved if it poses a threat to human lives and/or the owners don't express concern over them). This may be what this man was told.

That's the only way this informal practice would make sense. I think that guy just make a logical leap because he's "so intelligent."

Hmmm, your response seems a little contradictory. In that context the "you people" would not have bothered me. Should she have said you non-Chinese people? Some of "us people" need to be more selective in picking our battles.

yeah he was rather patronizing to you. What was your response?

I understand that the woman did not mean to be offensive, but I don't like being referred to as "you people" no matter what the context. I don't like the way it sounds and, while I won't walk away or fuss, the look on my face reflects that sentiment. There's nothing contradictory about that.

In my Multicultural class, I recounted my story of a white student at our school asking my opinion as a "colored" woman. :mad::rolleyes: I knew she didn't mean any harm, but she got "the face." It bothered me and I let her know it in as non-confrontational a way as I could.

How do you know she got the message? If it bothers you that much then you should say something in a diplomatic way. Otherwise they will keep doing it.

As for the term "you people" are you guys, you all, or y'all okay? To me it is a matter of context not the words themselves.

If it is a matter of context for you, that's fine. I don't like the phrase at all. IME none of the other phrases has never been said to me in demeaning way. "You people" has so I don't like that one and will make that preference known if someone is talking to me.

Well I definitely can't dispute your experiences, nor should I. It's just too bad that the the intended use of the term to demean is still perceived as such today. I guess for me it is one of those "don't sweat the small stuff" since in my experiences I have been demeaned in much worse fashion.

The next time someone uses the term, try using it term back at them and see how they respond. You might find it funny, because my guess is it will go over their heads. And if you really push it they will be bewildered. LOL

Well, "you people" can have non-race implications that depend on the tone and the context. That's just something to keep in mind because the longer you live, the more you'll experience.

But, if something catches your attention, and you want to give the person the benefit of the doubt, simply say in a neutral tone "yes, many Americans only like crab legs...but some of us eat whole crabs." Even if the person was being racial, that can remove whatever context that person intended and many people will get the point. If they are adament, they will try to assert the racial implications by saying "no, I meant Black people" to which you can respond with "oh, please, next time just say 'Black people' instead of 'you people'...I find that plenty of Black people love whole crabs if we can find restaurants that serve it, etc."

Facial expressions can be passive aggressive and just as silly as walking away or fussing. Most professional and nonprofessional contexts are opportunities for adults to talk and to learn, in nonconfrontational and noncondescending tones. :) Again, facial expressions can be extremely confrontational and passive aggressive, so next time also simply talk to your "colored" classmate.

"You guys" is only okay if the speaker is talking to/about a group of guys.

ETA: I laughed when I read christiangirl say that "you guys" has never been used with her in a condescending tone. I understand that people, particularly women, jokingly and lightheartedly use it out of habit. However, as far as I and many are concerned, there's no noncondescending way to assume gender, race, class, or sexual orientation neutrality. I am not a "guy," even on my worst day. So, save the references to maleness for when you're only talking about or to males.

^^Thanks for the comments ladies I'll keep that in mind. ;)

This girl just said "I have allergies, but I'm not allergic to anything." Then went on to try to explain why that made perfect sense. She failed. :confused:

I knew something crazy was gonna happen because we were on the reproduction section in my Human Anatomy class

The professor was explaining the content of semen and that it has a lot of sodium. And (I say) the stupidest girl in the world raises her hand and asks, "is that why it tastes so salty?":eek: A hush fell over the lecture hall until somebody yelled out "HA!!!!" then the whole room including the professor couldn't stop laughing.

I think this happens in every Bio class. It happened when I was in high school. I've started to wonder if that's some sort of running joke and no class is complete until someone says it. :rolleyes:

My Kids and I often travel Alone without my husband, which often prompt many to ask if they are mine because they look like him. my husband is white and i am black. well on our particular trip to california due to me being activated while i was in the military i was taking my kids to visit their grandparents and we were meeting him there. well while we boarded the plane this one white lady became purely fascinated by my two year old son who at the time had extremely curly light brown/blond curls. And while he was playing gleefully while waiting for the plane the lady decided to walk over to me and ask questions
the first question was "where did you adopt your children?" the questions startled me for a second before i told her that my kids where not adopted but naturally born by me
second question was " but you're so black how is that possible?
my answer to her was " every now and again the massa sneaks to the slave quarters"
of which left her with her jaw hanging wide open. the only thing thatr sucked even more from the questions was the fact that we were in the same row on the flight. i kept shaking my head wanting to laugh at her after she was trying so hard not to stare at both of my kids

LOL. I'm embarassed for her.

We never discussed semen and sodium in biology class or sex education (looking back, we didn't discuss much of anything in sex ed in the early 90s).

We never discussed semen and sodium in biology class or sex education (looking back, we didn't discuss much of anything in sex ed in the early 90s).[/QUOTE]

Yeah...we didn't either...the last and only sex ed class we had was in the 7th grade by my football coach.

Lol, our sex ed was taught by a nun in the Religion class. We didn't learn much except the basics--where babies came from and that some teens choose to please themselves as they start to explore their bodies (but we better not do that). :rolleyes:

Yeah i basically got the same info in public school. We had a young nervous PE coach teaching out health class and he basically had the same message as the coach from Mean Girls. "Don't have sex, you will get chlamydia ...and you will die."

but I took that class with the stupid girl last semester in college. lol

So.. someone I know has been on an ignorance high lately.

Yesterday: '..there are a lot of immigrants who work there too.. people from Mexico, uh.. Eastern Europe.. from like Laos and Cambodia and Vietnam... Hispanics..'

Today: 'Close the door. Don't close the door, leave it open. You know, close it so it closes but is still open so we can just push it.'

What I find to be REALLY ignorant is that when the issue of illegal immigration is discussed, the focus is the US-Mexico border. Illegal immigrants, like legal immigrants, come from all over the world. Any plan to address illegal immigration must take into account the different countries and reasons for the activity that is illegal by our standards or it will fail miserably.

Agreed!!!

I just read on Facebook that a guy was in class and noticed a girl's tattoo said "God made me a real nigga." :mad:

Please tell me you are joking.

i keep seeing people with tattoos that say stupid stuff like "Est. 1989"
"Made in *insert city*" or "Ratchet til i die" it's getting ridiculous

Seriously?! lmbo! What does that even mean?

I've heard that Ratchet City is a nickname for Shreveport, Louisiana. IDK

In the 4 summers I was there, I never once heard that. Wow, learn something new every day. *shrug*

being Ratchet is just being an all around hood rat/pigeon. And people down here in Louisiana claim it like its the best thing in the world... embracing the ignorance

Oh I've got one! I was at a party last night, and I was talking to an acquaintance when a guy I had never met came up to us and started talking to us. He asked us where we're from, etc. It turns out the acquaintance and this guy went to high schools that were very close to each other. They were talking about their town and schools, and then the guy mentioned that the neighborhood was "changing for the worse". He said, "Yeah, there's a lot of Arabs and blacks there now, though" Now, if I hadn't had a few drinks, I would have been a bigger person and politely excused myself from the conversation ASAP...it clearly wasn't worthwhile to waste the time of day on this guy. But, like I said, I had a few cocktails, and opened my big mouth.

I said, "So? Why's that bad? What's wrong with a little diversity?" The guy, who CLEARLY was not expecting that one, just kind of looked at me stunned. I guess the crowd he runs in all shares the same beliefs...and apparently they think everyone else in the world does too? "I enjoy experiencing other cultures, but maybe that's because I'm half Puerto Rican" (I know, lame argument, but I was a tipsy:o). I continued with, "I hope my being Latino doesn't bother you." Then he replied, "Oh no, you're fine, because you act white." :confused:

All I do was say, "Yeah, nice talking to ya" and walk away. I guess I won though. He looked incredibly awkward after that, and left within about 10 minutes.

I'm happy I contained myself. If I've been drinking and you get me on a subject that I feel strongly about, I will not let it go, lol. But I'm really starting to realize that you just can't change people's beliefs and spending time stressing and being upset about is not worth it.

One thing I find funny about the whole situation is the fact that the guy just ASSUMED it was okay to say something like that to strangers. Really? He doesn't know our backgrounds or beliefs...I don't know, if you feel that way fine, but to reveal your ignorant beliefs to perfect strangers is potentially asking for it. It reminds me of a situation my dad was in once...

He somehow started talking to a neighbor who lives around the block one day. To my knowledge, they had only met recently and talked once or twice before. Well, they were talking about the neighborhood, and the guy says to my dad, "There's too many n****** and 'spics moving in." He said this. To my father. Who is 100% Puerto Rican. That just blows my mind because you can tell that my dad is Latino! WTF! My dad just said, "You're an idiot" and walked away. What's even more ridiculous is his definition of "too many": According to the statistics I found my neighborhood is 88% white, <1% Black, and 6% Latino.

Oh, people. :rolleyes:

I searched a child's clothes today at work (we search belongings before giving them to the patients). Her mother had brought her a bag of clothes and, low and behold...a pair of red string bikini panties with "Danger: Slippery When Wet" printed across the butt. :eek: The girl was barely 14, if that, and she said her mom had bought them for her. :mad: Not ignant just...yuck.

I know I'm a few days late on this....

One reason that the focus is on the US-Mexico border is because of the physical nature of the border in Texas. There are parts of the Rio Grande River that is ankle deep so people can easily cross it.

I think the issue of immigration comes down to taxation. If there was a way to tax illegal immigrants then the immigration issue would not be a problem.

To cross the US-Canadian border is even easier.....And we have TWO borders with Canada (think Alaska)!