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Great update, Chuck!
I bet you become president right after you're initiated...of the national headquarters. |
Headquarters? Naw - - - NPC, baby!
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Here is Chuck at the Panhellenic Pre Recruitment Parties
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Im3rh...eature=related |
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Awww...Chuck! It sounds like your recruitment is going so well! Just remember to keep an open mind so you can find your true home.:rolleyes:
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OMG, this thread is making me laugh so much! I'm sure my neighbors can hear me. My favorite line:
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I. am. cryin'. Go, Chuck, go! |
I really can't wait for the next installment of the Chuck Norris Throwdown! Pure comedy.
Better than Kathy Griffin's Life on the D List |
Damn it, i'm going to purgatory!!!!
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Chuck's reason for editing is the best I've ever seen! |
http://rillek.files.wordpress.com/20...poster-425.jpg
Good luck Chuck! It sounds like you will find the right fit for you! |
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this is the most wonderful thing on the internet right now.
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Side note: Chuck Norris' old house is down the road from my own. |
Brilliant. Chuck, I humbly beg you to return and let us know how prefs went.
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who is that "creepy Zeta?"
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While we wait for the next round, who wants to guess about the identity of the mysterious Zeta "sister?" I'm pretty sure we haven't seen the last of her... |
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As a Zeta who actually had a mysterious woman sitting in the corner taking notes first round... I'm guessing national officer, and that it's a new-ish chapter. |
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An update from this morning's Chucktastic recruitment adventure...
Round 3: Philanthropy Chuck has been learning a lot on GC about being panhellenicky. Therefore, Chuck decided to incorporate panhellenic spirit into his morning routine. First, his choice of wardrobe: Chuck wore old blue jeans, an ivy-green shirt, olive-green boots, bronze spurs, and a pearl-studded crimson belt affixed by a gold lion belt buckle. Chuck finished the look with a straw cowboy hat. Underneath, Chuck sported his usual white briefs, and after the clown scare yesterday, Chuck equipped himself with an anchor-shaped death star tucked into his secret ammo pouch. Chuck also made sure he ate a large bowl of wheaties (marketed by General Mills) to start out this very busy day. Chuck later told his fellow PNMs that in the Panhellenic spirit he is hereby renaming the famous crescent kick as a “waxing crescent moon kick.” Chuck really enjoyed getting to know his fellow PNMs this morning, and they unanimously elected him MVPNM for the recruitment week after watching his lightening-quick reflexes at the Kappa party. Chuck isn’t so sure the sororities themselves felt as safe, because he noticed that (yet again) their Rho Chi had been replaced. But this time, it appeared that the replacement was not a collegian, but one of the American Gladiator girls. Chuck thought this was interesting, but did not feel threatened because most of those sissies just looked tough without any actual skill. On to the parties… Zeta Tau Alpha – Chuck really enjoyed the Zeta party today. Zeta’s philanthropy is the Komen foundation, and Chuck is all about saving the boobies. All boobies of all sizes. Little Zeta, whom he spoke with yesterday, was a little naïve today, but Chuck really likes her anyway, along with this one Zeta with a really strong southern accent. Chuck finds that sexy. Chuck didn’t see creepy zeta anywhere today and decided she must have disappeared, or was possibly banned from the house? Chuck doesn’t care though. There were plenty of nice Zetas to keep him company. At one point a Zeta came up to Chuck and told Chuck that she was a theater major. She asked Chuck, “As an experienced and talented actor, I was wondering if you had any tips on getting into such a badass character?” Chuck said, “Chuck doesn’t act, Chuck is a badass.” Kappa Alpha Theta – Theta’s philanthropy is CASA, or Court-Appointed Special Advocates. The Thetas told Chuck that kids often need to have someone involved in the legal system to make sure their needs did not get overlooked in the process. During the party, the group made cards and toys for the CASA kids. Chuck sat down at a table with kung fu theta and reached for some scissors to make a card. Kung fu Theta said “Actually, Chuck, we brought some special scissors for you to use today.” Kung fu Theta handed Chuck some special plastic-ended scissors with plastic yellow handles. Chuck did not appreciate this, but Chuck was quickly distracted by the large amounts of gold glitter the girls were using. Chuck likes glitter. Pi Beta Phi – The Pi Phis support “Champions are Readers,” a charity that promotes literacy. Everyone sat around tables and made these bookmarks for kids that were SOOOO cute. Chuck started talking to some of the Pi Phis about Mike Huckabee’s books and how people should read them before they vote for someone else. For absolutely no reason whatsoever, a girl started getting really upset with Chuck and told Chuck that people shouldn’t have to read candidates books to know what they’re about. Chuck told her “You’ll read what I tell you to read.” and threw the Japanese-death anchor from his pouch at her. Chuck wins. Kappa Kappa Gamma – Chuck walked into the Kappa house and sat at a craft table with some of the girls he remembered from the first party. Throw-up Kappa made a special point to thank Chuck for his bravery the day before against the scary Kappa Clown. Chuck looked around and realized that the Kappas, too, were making bookmarks. Chuck said, “Wow, Chuck is going to be really good at making bookmarks after this party. Did y’all realize the Pi Phis have the same philanthropy?” One Kappa got really mad and said “No, Chuck, our philanthropy is RIF, Reading is Fundamental. RIF is totally different than Champions are Readers. If you can’t see the difference between us and the Pi Phis, then maybe all you care about is having letters, anyway.” Chuck said “Chuck doesn’t need keys because Chuck likes to break stuff open” and gave the Kappa his ancient kimono knee jab. After Chuck left the Kappa party, Chuck realized that was two violent Kappa party outbursts in a row and that probably did not bode well for Chuck. Chuck cut Kappa for tonight’s preference round. |
Even my non-greek husband is addicted to this thread.
*wiping tears from my eyes* |
I really hope Chuck is going to be a creative writing major when he retires from the silver screen and that his English professors don't stifle his creativity to fit their mold!
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Yeah for the crescent kick!
I AM SO HONOURED - the waxing crescent kick - um, KICKS ***! (as does Chuck). Hmmm . . .how can we work it into ritual??
Go Chuck Go! (and I'm with him about clowns) |
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Chuck I am losing my GC virginity to you with this post and who better to do it with than you !!! This is the best story ever. My whole family is now engaged in this. Please consider a career in the written word and please consider updating us on your pledge experiences!!
Can't wait for more...... |
I love this thread, and I have never been more persistent in checking for updates! :)
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Unlike some college coeds that I see out and about, you know he would never be so tacky to wear the letters across his rear end.
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For some reason, I can't see Chuck with a Big Sis. It seems to me the entire chapter would be Chuck's little(s)
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hahaha this thread is GREAT!!!! i love it.
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Chuck just can't believe his recruitment is almost over! (tear)
Round 4: Preference Chuck decided that an occasion like Preference merited a significant increase in the Chuck factor. Yes, an up-Chuck was positively required. Chuck wore a really awesome silk suit, snakeskin tie, and ostrich-feather lined cowboy boots. Chuck looked like money and he DID know it. As Chuck approached what he now likes to call his “War Cabana,” Chuck noticed a crowd had been drawn around one of the girls. Double-legacy-phi-mu girl was as pissed as Tom Brady was last time Chuck gave him the smack down. There was a new Rho Chi under the Cabana … none other than the NPC chairman, Ms. Julie Burkhard. Legacy girl had her finger in Burkhard’s face and was threatening that “if something isn’t done fast, my parents will have all the greek orgs thrown off of the campus!” Legacy girl continued, “my mom is in the Dean’s office right now and if you don’t do something about this, she will. For me to be dropped by all the houses right before preference must be a result some type of prejudice against me or some conspiracy amongst the sororities. Sororities are so silly, superficial and ridiculous and this proves it.” Ms. Burkhard looked confused, and asked, “if they’re so silly and superficial, then why on earth are you so upset that everyone dropped you?” Legacy girl reached for her phone, saying “you just wait until I tell my Mom about this.” Chuck grabbed the cell phone and crushed it with one fist. Chuck told legacy girl “Consider yourself no-rec-ed. By Chuck.” After legacy girl was gone (there were several waxing crescent moon kicks involved), the group split up into groups based on which Preferences they were to attend. First up for Chuck was Kappa Alpha Theta. Kappa Alpha Theta - Chuck was immediately greeted by kung fu Theta, who had a large smile on her face. Kung fu theta said “Chuck, I was so happy to see you again, tonight. I want you to know that while others may not understand sporadic, insuppressible violence, I do. America and Theta needs you to have a chance against the Axis of Evil. You know what Chuck, I’m not supposed to say stuff like this, but you’re my Rush Crush!” This angered and confused Chuck. Chuck immediately threw kung fu Theta into a table of sparkling cider and yellow-iced kite cookies. Chuck said, “Whose rush is crushed now?” The Thetas then explained to Chuck what a “rush crush” was. Chuck said, “Oh.” The Theta preference continued and was very nice. Pi Beta Phi – Chuck was immediately greeted by a Pi Phi that he had connected with on the first night. He noticed that all of the other PNMs were being greeted with arrow-shaped cookies with the PNMs’ names thoughtfully written on them in icing. Chuck thought this was very nice, until the Pi Phi preffing him handed him his cookie. Instead of arrow shaped, Chuck’s cookie was shaped like a Glock. Chuck was touched because it was obvious the Pi Phis had taken the time to know the real Chuck. The Pi Phi Preference really showed Chuck what it would be like to be a sister there. Zeta Tau Alpha – At the Zeta Preference, Chuck was also very impressed. Southern-Zeta greeted Chuck at the door and complimented him on his snakeskin tie. Chuck knew it was a badass tie, but acted very gracious. Then, Little-Zeta came into the conversation, as well, to echo Southern-Zeta’s admiration of Chuck’s tie. Southern-Zeta seemed uncomfortable and motioned for Little-Zeta to go away. Chuck said, “What’s the matter, ladies? Plenty of Chuckalicious Norris to go around, you know. Southern-Zeta explained that “hot boxing” was strictly prohibited and Zetas are very respectful of recruitment rules. Chuck raised his eyebrows, “Well, that’s one rule that has to go. Any sisters that want to hotbox each other is okay in Chuck’s book.” Southern-Zeta blushed, the proper lady that she is, and explained what hotboxing is in recruitment slang. Chuck thought this highly uninteresting. Southern-Zeta led Chuck to a table of turquoise-chocolate dipped strawberries and they talked some more. Chuck was really comfortable with the Zetas and was starting to feel like Zeta could be his future family! What better home for a Kung Fu King than with a crown on his head – and Chuck is all about bringing justice to all! Chuck was stumped. It would be a really tough choice ranking these three excellent groups. But then, Chuck suddenly knew the solution to his bid card conundrum and immediately began to work his Chuck-magic on it as he filled it out... Stay tuned! Will Chuck end up Pi Phi’s Angel of Death? The Zeta King of Justice? Or will Chuck fight liberals everywhere as Theta’s newest secret weapon? |
Once again, Mr. Norris has a way with words like no other.
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Feel free to bite off the neck if a corkscrew isn't handy. |
ooooo I hope he becomes a Zeta king of justice!
Good Luck Chuck! |
I love this thread and the only thing that makes me sad is that Tri Delta was not an opition for him. :( He would have rocked carrying around a Trident! I'm thinking Chuck goes Theta b/c he and kung fu Theta clearly have a strong bond.... she'll totally end up being his big! :p
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When Chuck chooses his Greek home, he will defend it -
any way he can, be it with a glock in hand, a death stare, his fists, or a roundhouse kick. Yeah, Chuck! Representing the fighting spirit of Greeks everywhere! Just a reminder: He's one of those PNM's that everyone wants. So the decision is totally his! :) |
Dang I was ready for the reveal....hurry....
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I know Chuck is a popular PNM, but we should never assume that he will definitley get a bid. Stranger things have happened! ;) Just keep your fingers crossed that he does not get a phone call this morning.
Good luck, Chuck! I hope this is a very happy Bid Day for you! |
He's probably out celebrating with his sisters - he may not get to post for a while.
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