I'm going to a wedding reception tonight, but I doubt I'll have anything to report here! (Just the reception because it's a Mormon wedding and non-LDS people can't go to the ceremony).

Exactly one year ago we were at a destination wedding. Our dear friends son was getting married...to a girl who has the family from hell.

To wit: The shower...mom and aunt did show up. Never said thank you or spoke to any of us. The bride, formerly a vegetarian...now a vegan...dictated that everyone had to be vegan too. Lots of soy...I had breast cancer. I can't eat soy. No problem...went home and had lunch. It was a very expensive lunch.

Guest list: Bride: 220...Groom: 58. People that is. The father and mother of the groom weren't announced, allowed to toast the couple, nor were they thanked by their son. The bride and groom never came over to "his" side to say hello and thank you for coming. Her parents didn't greet us. I actually went up to the MOB to say thank you, repeated it twice...she turned around and walked away.

Best food: mashed potato bar...with soy cheese......The bar: the eco friendly couple who had cork kippas, had two bartenders (for almost 300 people), and they used...plastic glasses.

MOB ordered food for rehearsal dinner which groom's parents paid for....ordered enough food for 40...100 showed up...all their family who were local. We ordered Papa John's at the hotel. *Our friends are not cheap. The object was to humiliate them.

The best part? The thank you note: A post card with the happy couple holding a sign that read Thanks!

Stories like this remind me that I am so lucky to be getting the in-laws I am!

Same here.

The couple in question has had two children. The first was a girl, and DH and I found out about her only through the grapevine. The second, though, was a BOY. They emailed everyone they knew - "Come to the bris! Come to the bris!" It was dead obvious that they felt the birth of a BOY was something worth celebrating, while the birth of a girl was almost something to be mourned.

I had half a mind to respond to their email asking if they were planning on ordering enough food.

Needless to say, we did not go.

:-/

Can I assume that these are not people who would have a bat mitzvah for their daughter when that particular age comes around?

The worst wedding I've ever attended was a close family member's.

I found out about it the night before.

I arrived at the location-the pastor's office in an office plaza.

There were pictures of the past with MC Hammer among others all over his office. The pastor was wearing nicer clothes than the groom and the groom's brother (the best man). However, while he was dressed nicer, it still wasn't appropriate. He could have at least toned it down by taking of the diamond pinky rings! His wife was there running the show, but I don't remember was she had on so it had to have been normal.

The best man is also a close family member of mine, so it'll suffice to say he's very tall and his pants weren't quite long enough.

The bridesmaid (who I'm not related to) was wearing a lavender gown that was apparently from another wedding she'd been in some time back so it didn't quite fit. She had on clear lucite stripper platform shoes (I guess nothing else matched that lavender)! The bride (who I'm not related to) was wearing a backless ( :eek: ) white dress that was long in the back and short in the front. (Think Marilyn Monroe over the subway grate). It would've been great if we were on the beach or for a romantic date, but whatever.

My boyfriend at the time was the best dressed man there. A suit and tie, while no one else bothered. I think the groom was dressed similarly though, so he was at least okay.

The reception was in another family member's backyard which actually wasn't bad cos we have parties there all the time. The next-door-neighbor let them use his Bentley for the affair and gave them an expensive bottle of champagne.

They are no longer married, but considering that the bride was younger than me, that's not a bad thing. My family member has moved on to bigger and better things, although I don't think he'll ever get over losing custody of the dog.

I'd be surprised if they did.

Poor girl. :(

(I know not all Jewish traditions celebrate bat mitzvahs, I just hate to see a kid treated that way.)

Even some Orthodox synagogues permit Bat Mitzvahs now!....ok the girl can't touch the torah...but there is some leeway.

That poor child.......

Gee, why not just take her to a third-world country and trade her for a yak? :rolleyes:
The whole time I'm sitting here thinking, please don't be Black...please don't be Black...
Dagnabbit. :(

Actually, my family is, but the pastor was NOT! But he was LOVIN' the Steve Harvey style! :eek:

has anyone ever been to a wedding where the pastor says "if anyone here objects, please speak now" and someone actually did this?

No, but I was thinking it several times over many years. Come to think of it, I've seen a lot of people significantly cutting their eyes around when the pastor said that.

No, But in the wedding that I described a number of the people from "our" (the groom's side) were waiting for the Rabbi to say it. The Rabbi didn't say it, but gosh if he did...someone might have said something.

Okay, so I went to a wedding this summer for one of my best friends. I love him to death, and his wife is pretty cool too, but their wedding was pretty... awful.

So they had to plan it "on a budget," which I totally get, but there are some things you just don't do. The bride's dress was so thin and cheap, I could literally see her underwear through the back of her dress! It was a nice design, but obviously not very well made. I felt kinda bad for her. She didn't bother to get her hair or her makeup done. All she had on was mascara and lip gloss... kinda weird. The ceremony would have been fine, if I could have heard the pastor at all! I was sitting near the front, too. It was in a fairly large church and they apparently neglected to get a mic, so nobody could hear him. After the vows, there was the exchange of rings. Because they were on a budget, they had the pastor change out "circle of gold (or whatever it was)" to "circle of titanium (or some other cheap metal). It was very awkward to say the least. Then, they went to do their unity candle, which I think is a really cute tradition. However, the didn't light it right away, they stood behind the table talking to each other quietly for several minutes while the audience just sat there, confused and waiting around. If I thought the ceremony was bad, it was nothing compared to the reception.

The reception was held at a very old but beautiful church I had never been in before. Unfortunately, the road to get to it was closed, so all of the guests had to take a detour through a really seedy part of town. When we all got there, there was no music, no drinks, no appetizers, no nothing. We were just expected to sit there and wait for the bride and groom. I forgot to mention that it was in a gymnasium done up in the finest 1970's style. They tried to doll it up using fabric, but it kept falling down on the guests. It was in the middle of summer in the hot and humid midwest and the church had no air conditioning or open windows. The room was not nearly big enough to hold all the guests they invited, so we were sandwiched together in our formal wear in a swelteringly hot confined space with nothing to eat or drink. The bride and the groom took their pictures, which is totally fine. After they were done with their pictures, they decided to take off and "do something else," that something else being having sex in the back of their car. They made everyone wait so they could have sex. I was seated at the "family and important people" table according to the check in list. I got to the table and there was no name card or place setting for me. I was sat with a bunch of old people who I didn't know and an inept young dad with two screaming toddlers. When the bride and groom FINALLY arrive, the food is served. It was buffet style, and since I was at the "important people" table, we got to go after the bridal party. They got it catered from some obscure place, and half the time I couldn't tell what it was supposed to be. I literally could not tell the difference between a fish fillet and a chicken breast.vAfter eating the mystery meat, I immediately began to feel sick and had to go to a nursery and lie down. I wasn't the only one either.

I think that this wedding could have been decent if there weren't technical difficulties and awkward pauses during the ceremony. I doubt if the reception could have been salvaged though. A hot gym with falling down decorations with nothing to drink and horrible food made for many unhappy guests. I would have to say this is the worst example of a "budget wedding" that I've ever seen. I still love my friends to death, even though their wedding was like hell on earth! :)

Sheez. If you're on that much of a "budget" there are so many classier alternatives, such as:

- Have a small wedding now. Immediate family and a handful of close friends only. Go out for a nice dinner after the ceremony. Have an anniversary party in a year or two, when you've saved up enough money for the Big Party you want.

- Scale down your guest list.

- Don't get married now. Wait a year or two and save up for a better quality dress, better rings, better reception venue, better food, etc.

But something tells me "classy" wasn't the first thought on their minds. That something being making everyone wait while they got it on in the back of a car.

They are really classy people, but it was just thrown together quite quickly. The bridesmaids looked more dressed up than the bride. They also had upwards of 200 people there.

IDK, I don't associate sex in the back of a car and class.

That sounds like the absolute worst wedding ever. I'm certain I'd have left. I love reading these stories, they give me the guts to walk out if this ever happens to me. A couple more and I'll probably have enough guts to take my gift with me! :p

Me either...I mean...it happens, but not between the wedding and the reception.

I'm confident there are better ways to handle low budget weddings. The majority of my friends who have been married in the last couple of years obviously had limited budgets, but they all did a great job of stretching them. Their weddings were low budget but still classy. Having fewer guests, making your own centerpieces, etc. are ways to use your money wisely.

I used to work in a store that rented tuxes. One of the groomsmen was an investment advisor. Unknown to the groom, all the groomsmen had given an additional gift of $100 each that one put into a portfolio and was managing, so that when it was time, he would have money for divorce proceedings. They were that confident the man was making a mistake.

Hopefully if they were wrong, they could have given it to the couple for something like a 25th anniversary cruise or something. But *ouch*.

Thankfully, no.

FWIW, the question traditionally is along the lines of "if any man can show any just cause why they may not lawfully be joined together, let him now speak or else hereafter for ever hold his peace." The bold is my emphasis; the point of the question was not to see if anyone thought the marriage was a bad idea, but it was a last chance for anyone to claim that there was a legal impediment to the marriage.

The custom relates to the publishing of banns, which is still (I believe) required in the Church of England but no longer required in the Roman Catholic Church. (One will also sometimes hear banns published in Episcopal churches, though it is not required.) In order for a marriage to be legal, notice had to be given on successive Sundays prior to the wedding; the notice according to the use of the Church of England is along these lines: "I publish the banns of marriage between NN of _____ and NN of _____. This is the first/second/third time of asking. If any of you know cause or just impediment why these two persons should not be joined together in Holy Matrimony, ye are to declare it." (Or "This is the first/second/third time of asking. If any of you know any reason in law why they may not marry each other you are to declare it.")

Mormon weddings really come in two types.
(My wife is Mormon, I'm not)
1) Temple Weddings - the "We are going to the Temple and only those LDS who are faithful and have permission from their church leaders (which in this case requires being 18*) can attend"

2) Other Weddings - Normally occurs when one or both members are recent converts to the church *OR* when the *woman* is getting married for the second time.

For #1, it is just about *impossible* to overspend for the wedding. (No Music, Officiant is normally an *experienced* volunteer who has it as a church calling, modest wedding dress (train if it exists has to be detachable), Groom's outfit is his normal temple formalwear (all white as well)

No alcohol at the reception for either type of course. Needless to say all of these rules tend to cut down on the possibility of drama...

*Yes, it is possible for someone under 18 to come into the Temple for certain specific things, but none are *directly* related to weddings. So a 16 year old girl wouldn't be able to see her sister get married and in fact for a convert to the Church, it is entirely possible for *parents* not to be able to see them get married...

I've only been to a few weddings in my time, but one of them was really weird. Another one is upcoming, and it has the markings of a trainwreck all over it.

WEDDING #1

About 2 years ago a good friend of mine from HS got married. He is VERY VERY religious, and had been dating his fiance for 6 months when he proposed. I am about 90% sure that they got married so fast (both were still in college, not sure she was old enough to drink) so they could have sex. (This I think is the pitfall of the waiting-til-marriage thing. Another discussion for another time).

I'm not sure my mother and I were even actually invited to the wedding, we were just sort of told about it.

The beginning of the ceremony wasn't too bad (except apparently the groom forgot to bring his pants and the groomsmen had to run to walmart to get him some cheap black pants. This is totally typical of the groom, very smart but absolutely no sense). But then the minister (pastor? not too familiar with the terms) started giving a little speech (this is paraphrased, it's been two years):

"Bride, Groom, I want you to face each other and look deep into each others' eyes. You see love there, you see your soul mate. Well, I want you to know that in a few years you will wake up and see the person next to you, and you will NOT love them."

He went on in this vein for a while. I think I know where he was going with it, that a marriage isn't all sunshine and rainbows and that you need to work through the hard times. But it just seemed SO INAPPROPRIATE to do this in the middle of the ceremony.

Plus the vows had all this weird stuff about how the bride would "cleave herself" to her husband. Awkward (and reinforced my ideas about the reasons for the quick marriage...)

The reception was in the childrens' play room of the church. There was no alcohol, it was the most awkward reception ever.


WEDDING #2
On Saturday is my cousin's wedding. Due to some very complicated family issues, she and her brother came to live with my family for a few years while we were all in high school. It was not an easy time for any of us.

She's marrying a very nice (but boring) young man, whose family is crazy religious (like refuses to allow their kids to celebrate Halloween religious). Also, Cousin's dad has finally shown back up on the scene, and he has a new wife. New Wife and Cousin HATE each other.

Also, apparently, New Wife is crazy. She has repeatedly told Cousin that she will NEVER attend Cousin's wedding, that Cousin is ruining Cousin's Dad's life, etc etc. And then when Cousin (correctly, to my mind) sent her father a wedding invitation with New Wife invited as well, New Wife sent back the RSVP with a huge red ZERO in the Guests Attending spot, and a diatribe written around the edge. Apparently this is because Cousin did not include New Wife with her father in the actual invitation (i.e. it said "Father's daughter, Cousin" instead of "Father and New Wife's daughter, Cousin" engraved on the invitation).

Seriously, this woman is crazy. Currently she is planning on attending both wedding and bridal shower (!), although she has changed her mind on both several times.

Also, she hates my entire family because we did not throw her a reception after she and Cousin's Father married. Because they kept it a secret. (We knew because Cousin told us, but neither member of the couple did. --This is my mother's brother... sheesh).

On the other hand, Cousin used to be very slim but grew a lot in college (and never got clothes any bigger)... her strapless corset, princess dress is just not flattering.

I am VERY interested to see how this wedding will turn out. There will be no alcohol at the reception because Groom's parents do not know their (25 year old) son drinks.

FWIW2,

Many traditional wedding vows include the vow to cleave or "keep" only to the spouse. The wording alludes to this passage (Mark 10:6-8) as translated in the King James Version: "But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; And the twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh." The implication of "cleave" is to be joined inseperably. (The New Revised Standard says "be joined to his wife.")

Can't wait to hear about this weekend's wedding.

In high school I went to a cousin's wedding that had a Renaissance/mideval theme. Guests didn't have to dress up, but it was encouraged. Entertainment included jousting and a jester, and we ate with our hands. Yes, I'm serious.

HAHAHAH!!! This is the funniest thing I've heard all day! LOVE IT. That's insane though, I've never heard of anyone doing this for real.

So many, most involving too long a wait between the bar opening and the dinner being served. But at a recent reunion, we agreed this one took the cake.:

Bride was the VERY proper daughter of a Rear Admiral and sister of a Naval Academy cadet. Wedding was at Naval Academy. Nothing in the invitation implied dinner (to me), so I filled up on snacks, while everyone else drank and drank and drank and drank.

What ensued: Girls puking into potted plants in a nice Annapolis restaurant. Girls kissing cadets they had just met at the wedding (although I have a nice picture or me wearing one guy's hat). Girls teaching cadets how to tie marachino cherry stems into knots. Girls going to the hospital to pick up the groom's fraternity brother, who, jumped into the Potomoc in an attempt to evade Naval Academy MPs who caught him breaking into the Dean's car (in fairness, it was the same make, model and color as the car we had arrived in, and he couldn't figure out why the keys didn't work).

Oh god that is so so funny lol.

ooooh...last stop before I go because when I think about these I kept taking mental notes for things myself and my s/o to place on our NOT TO DO list.

1. It's not that it was the worst but how GHETTO it was. I won't talk about the fact that the bride had spent 800K on a 400K house because she wanted 'all of the upgrades' and truthfully can't afford it and had (cuz she foreclosed a few months ago)her kids, sister's kids and baby daddy who wasn't working at the time kids, living there and then had the nerve to have the wedding in a large chruch which was 3/4 empty because dayum near the whole family was in the bridal party. There was a total of 40 people AT THE ALTAR including the bride and groom and 1/2 of them acted like they never saw formal wear before...and we aren't going to talk about the reception where we waited for nearly 2 hrs because they rented a stretch Hummer AND a Rolls Royce and got caught up taking pics and uhhhh....yeah they got pulled over.

2. This disaster...wow. Ummm...let's see...the couple who lived in MD decided that it was cheaper to do the ceremony in some non descript Hilton hotel off of the highway in this lil @ssed courtyard in the dead middle of August...add to that the bride who always for as long as I have known her been LATE for every dayum thing in her life was 1 and a 1/2 hrs late because she was STILL putting on makeup even though she had been up since the butt crack of dawn getting ready (the wedding was to start at 1pm) The funny part was watching the groom studder over the for richer or for poorer line (whu what? huh?..oh ok...) But the KILLER? THEY SERVED US BREAKFAST FOOD FOR THE RECEPTION DINNER!! And it wasn't nice gourmet food like crepes or Belgian waffles or French toast, but it was the STANDARD non descript no taste having breakfast food that you can get at ANY Hilton hotel that's...just off of the highway.

My boss' daughter recently was married in some sort of Mormon ceremony. I guess it wasn't a temple wedding because all the grandchildren were in the wedding.

Anyway, I guess during to vows the officiant asked the bride "is you is or is you not his baby?" to which she replied "I is". He then asked the groom "is you is or is you not his baby?".

We thought this was some sort of joke, but the officiant did it with a completely straight face.

Maybe he has an amazing poker face?

My cousin and his fiancee were both drama majors... The groomsmen walked down the aisle to the Darth Vader theme and the ceremony begins with the minister quoting from the wedding in The Princess Bride ("mawwige... is what bwings us togetha today.... wuv.... twue wuv.... is a dweam wivin a dweam") much to the discomfort of the audience. Everyone was dressed normally, short bridesmaids gowns, long wedding gown, groom in a tux, groomsmen in nice suits... and tennis shoes of their choice. Not all matching, or even close. When pronounced man and wife, the bride and groom straight up made out in front of everyone.. ick. Aside from all of that, the ceremony and reception were gorgeous. Just a little weird.

I just forwarded that story to a ton of people.:D

Hahaha! That's too funny... I can't believe that. Marching down the aisle to the Darth Vader theme... The most ridiculous processional/recessional music I've ever heard: "Baby Got Back" or "Ice Ice Baby."

I can do you one better: Recessional with "You know I want you!"

They got married at Medieval Times?? :eek:

:)
that must have been . . . different.