I thought people had bands at weddings, not DJs.

i've never been to a wedding with a band...all of them have been DJ's...including the one I'm going to this weekend

It all depends on personal preference. For my ceremony, I'm having two gentlemen play on guitars while I walk down the aisle. A pianist will be playing during the dinner & the DJ takes over for the dancing.

People can flame me for this if they get offended, but I'll go ahead and say it -- in my experience, the weddings I've attended that I would consider classy and tasteful have had bands. The others have had DJs. Please note that this is only my personal experience based on my life history of attending weddings in one specific geographic area.

I've never enjoyed what DJs play at weddings, but then I have very particular taste in music. I had the most fun at a wedding where they had a funk band called Uptighty -- they were awesome. I also dig Latin jazz and the like.

I'll just come right out and admit that I am a total wedding snob. I think most of the crap that goes on at wedding receptions is tacky and horrible -- so go ahead and discount my opinion if you like. I mean seriously, the chicken dance?! AW HELL NO.

I'm going to have an emo band play at my wedding, valkyrie. Would that be tacky or acceptable according to your rules? ;)

I think band vs. DJ depends what region of the country you are in. Two of my friends had a jazz band - however, they were the exception, and it was people they knew personally.

Bands are also much much more expensive. And a lot of the wedding bands around here just play covers of the same stuff DJs would play, so why blow the money?

Because the music that they constantly play
IT SAYS NOTHING TO ME ABOUT MY LIFE
Hang the blessed DJ

It's never a bad time to quote the Smiths. :cool:


Truthfully, I think a band sounds better than a DJ. I prefer live music. There are so many talented musicians in NYC so that might also be a factor.

LOL.

Emo band = acceptable only if you're sugar and spice.

Cover band = acceptable never.

I'm up in the burbs, you know, but I'd say it's about 60/40 djs over bands from the posts on theknot.com.

We had a dj for a number of reasons:
1) Our wants in music styles were way too varied to find a band that could handle it. We had disco, 80s, hip hop, salsa, merengue, Motown, Sinatra, Reggaton, etc.
2) I love to dance to songs that have a "meaning" to me - so like 33 said, it would just be a cover band and so I might as well have the dj b/c
3) it's cheaper! :)

We had a DJ, which worked out better for us. We met with the company several times to get a playlist, set the conduct for the DJ and pretty much plan the whole night. By the time the night came, the DJ knew exactly what to do and what to play. He took requests and all that, but it still ran exactly as we wanted.

I know people who have had problems with both DJs and bands. The bands we looked at were way too cheesy, and we were sold on the DJ idea before we even started looking.

Again, it's all a taste thing; we loved the way our wedding turned out, and really that's all that matters.

I had a band for the $20,000 wedding and a DJ for the $5000 wedding. I wasn't planning on a band for the first one because most of the wedding bands I'd heard made every song sound the same. But then I found this awesome band who was very talented and could do a variety of music really well, so I used them. The DJ for the second wedding was free and was a friend of the groom's. He is a DJ as a side job and did a really great job.

It really can be hard to find a band that can do the traditional polkas that the family expect, the sweet slow dances you want for the bridal dance and the good dance music for when the old folks all go home. I can imagine that the bands in NYC are better and more talented than in other parts of the country because so many talented people go to NYC to try to make it big.

Dee

For the most part, I don't have a problem with the dollar dance. If I don't feel comfortable trying to make idle chit-chat with the groom for two or three minutes, I'm not going up there. I don't think it's cheap, I think it's a cultural and most likely a regional thing. It's a freaking dollar and as some people have pointed out, it is an opportunity to talk to the bride or groom. I've known lots of women, who've used the opportunity to dance with the bride, just because they may not get to talk to her otherwise, other than the 30 seconds in the receiving line. Most of the weddings that I have gone to throughout my life have involved a dollar dance.

However, I have an interesting dollar dance story from a wedding I attended this last weekend. First off, the DJ sucked. Her music selections throughout the night were awful. That said, the DJ made an announcement that the last song for the Dollar Dance was on. The song ends and out of nowhere comes the drunk, annoying mother-in-law of my co-worker/the bride, yelling, "I DIDN"T GET TO DANCE WITH SCOTT YET!" Becky is looking positively mortified because the lines are gone, the floor is empty and the DJ's stammering to say, "Of course we'll be having one more song. This will be the last song." So in this instance I found this particular point of the dollar dance to be a bit awkward.

We had a DJ who has an amazing reputation. I gave him a specific list of what not to play (i.e. Chicken Dance, Macarena) and what I definitely wanted him to play. After a lot of the older people left, our friends were still around and made lots of requests. He played what everyone wanted, and we all had a blast.

I don't think people in our area have bands for weddings. I don't know of any bands in the area good enough for a wedding, and I've never been to a wedding with a band. For the actual ceremony, though, most people use quartets or ensembles. I HATE canned music for a wedding ceremony. One wedding I went to last year of the daughter of my in-law's friends had a CD player for the wedding march. Apparently someone scratched the CD so it was skipping as the poor girl was wandering down the aisle.

Do all the old guys get up and sing Volare together when the band takes a break? <sigh> We haven't had a wedding in so long.

Oh! That's another advantage of DJ over band. Bands take like 15 minute breaks every hour. DJs don't. I know some folks who have hired a DJ to cover the breaks the band takes.

Went to a friend's wedding. DJ was horrible. He only played songs he wanted to hear. After the bride and groom left, the party died. To make it worst, the open bar closed early.

It's like honey when it washes over me.
 

I think DJs can be done tastefully, but I have to admit that if I had one, he would pretty much be limited to Frank Sinatra, Ella Fitzgerald, big band stuff and that their ilk. I don't think I could deal with, like, Mariah Carey at my wedding.




Heather
-- I mean, after Luda's "What's Your Fantasy?" as my first dance with my husband, obviously.

At most of the weddings I've been to, there has been a band. I can only remember a DJ at two weddings I've attended in the past five years. In the first case, money was the driving factor (and the DJ, accordingly, sucked - you get what you pay for); in the second case, it was a small garden party (second wedding for both bride and groom) so they didn't want to do anything too elaborate.

My husband and I had a band. We'd heard them play at a friend's wedding, and they were very good, so we booked them. They had a pretty extensive repertoire - IIRC, they gave us a list, and we could indicate "must play" and "do not play" songs, as well as specifying songs for the first dance, exit dance, etc. I don't recall them taking any very long breaks, except of course during the meal.

Since we're talking about tackiness, I'll add that neither choice (band or DJ) is necessarily tacky. Honestly, I'd rather hear a good DJ than a bad band.

Our music tastes are so varied, I don't think there's a band out there that can play everything we like. I want to hear some 80's stuff like Depeche Mode, Duran Duran, as well as country b/c my sorority sisters & I do an amazing job dancing to Toby Keith. My fiance wants to hear newer music like Kanye West. A DJ can definitely take care of all our music wants as well as not play the crap that I hate like the Chicken dance, the Macarena, & the Electric Slide.

People can have whatever they want at their wedding. I've been to some with excellent DJs and others with terrible 5-piece bands.

It's probably cheaper to find a good band in a larger city than it is in small towns, too.

Hee, hee...I don't even know if there IS a band in my hometown, unless you want the kind that comes with uniforms and trombones or you really, really like gospel.

When I get married, I'll have a DJ.

How awesome would it be if a bride screamed " One Dolla make you Holla!"

But she said it in a asian fob lady accent.

Most of the weddings around here have DJs too. Some of them are great and some are terrible. Not that it matters at this point, but I would probably go with a DJ, but would want to personally go through and cross out songs that I would not want played. I like whoever had the idea of putting it in the contract that if he played a song on the "no" list, then no money. :)

The last wedding I went to that had a band.... Well the band just SUCKED!!!! And this is Austin... Supposedly the "Live music capital of the world". :p

I don't want a stuffy wedding reception! I want to have fun, and I want all my friends and family to have fun, too!

In my family, it's a tradition to have the dollar dance. At the bridal shower, the bride gets a satin drawstring purse that matches her color scheme, and that is used to put the money in.

It's also a tradition for everyone in the family to get up and go dance to the Chicken Dance and YMCA. (Yes, I went there! haha) It's fun, and since everyone else does it too, you don't feel like a complete idiot.

We also tap the water glasses with our knives to signal the bride to kiss her groom. I think we're the only ones that do that, because it's always funny to see the other family looking around, asking each other what we're doing.

I understand how this may seem tacky, but it's fun and that's all I care about.

My husband warned me about this before our wedding. I'd never heard of it before and he explained that it was a Northern tradition (he's from Ohio). His side of the family ended up not doing it, though... I think it was because we didn't sit down long enough to give them an opportunity! We did a heavy hors doerves buffet, and were up dancing the rest of the night. :)

It's funny that he's from Ohio.... Every wedding that I've been to where that was done was either IN Ohio or the people getting married were FROM Ohio. :)

That's been done at every wedding I've been to. I'm in the Chicago area...it was also done at one in Michigan.

We traditionally did the tapping on glasses to make the couple kiss and sometimes people go so crazy that they don't have time to eat. The replacement for that has become this: To make the couple kiss, you have to stand up and sing a love song. They usually do this as a whole table and is much funnier than the tapping on the glasses. It also lessens the frequency because a lot of times, people don't want to stand up and sing! I've been to some weddings where they held up cards rating the kisses on a scale of 1 to 10. I've never been to a banquet type reception where one of those two things weren't done. Then again, I'm from Michigan and so are all the people whose weddings I've been to!

The last few weddings I went to, the guests either had to sing a love song, or there were little bells on the tables to ring to get the new couple to kiss.

I liked the bells, but you have to be careful how you word an announcement about the love song - one (tacky) group sang Love Stinks!

I didn't realize that my post would start a band vs DJs debate. In my experience people have had bands not DJs at weddings. My sister is getting married next month and will have a band with a DJ to play their special songs. Yeah it's going to be a huge wedding.

Yeah, yeah....

dance vs. no dance, dj vs. band... who really CARES?

if they want their wedding w/ a dj, why shouldn't they be able to have it that way without everyone critizing (what spelling looks way weird!!!!)? If you don't want YOUR wedding that way, then don't do it that way for YOUR wedding and be over it.

i've been to weddings w/ DJs and weddings w/ bands. They were both equally fun & great.

I went to a wedding and at the reception, there were little bells on the tables with a heart-shaped handle. Guests were supposed to ring the bell for the groom & bride to kiss.

At first it was cute, but it definitely got old VERY quick....

This is huge up here, but the bride and groom usually ask people not to do it too much during dinner.

I went to wedding in Sudbury (Northern Ontario) this summer and they don't do that up there. Their reason was, people drink too much and glasses get broken. Anyway, what they had instead was a bowl of rose petals at the front and written on the rose petals were tasks. In order to get the bride and groom to kiss, the guests had to go up to the front and perform the task on the rose petal they got. They had to answer either a trivia question, or do a dance or sing a song, or tell a joke, etc. If they did not answer the question right or perform the task to the satisfaction of the bride and groom, the bride and groom did not kiss.

I thought it was a great idea. Not only did it make things fun, the bride and groom could actually eat their meal.

I've been to weddings where there has been a lot of glass-tapping to get the bride and groom to kiss. Fortunately it didn't happen at my wedding.

I got a great suggestion off alt.wedding for getting around the glass-tapping thing: When the guests start to tap their glasses, the bride and groom should tap their own glasses as well, and look confused... :p

We just didn't kiss when people did it. By the second time, people just saved their energy and didn't do it at all.