Congratulations to you and your daughter. What a sigh of relief you must feel now!!!! Thanks for sharing her story with us!!!:)

Many heartfelt congratulations to your daughter & to Kappa Delta. :) :) :)

I've been lurking on this thread and I must say... it was a cliff hanger!!! I'm so happy for your daughter and KD! You both must be so excited!!!

Congratulations to your daughter and the Sigma Sigma chapter of Kappa Delta! I hope she had a wonderful Bid Day and got to know all her new sisters! :D

oldrusheemom, send our congrats to your daughter!!! it is great to hear that she found a home in kappa delta! i hope she enjoys the rest of her experiences.

pinkmom, i am sory to hear about your daughter's experiences. its sad to hear she decided to drop out, but those comments are definately inappropriate.

What a wonderful ending! I believe Kappa Delta was the TRUE winner here! Congrats!!

I've been watching this thread and I was so excited when I saw that your daughter is now a Kappa Delta!!!! Yay! :)

May she bloom and grow!

Congrats to your daughter and Kappa Delta!

Congratulations Kappa Delta!
 

oldrusheenowmom,
I've been watching this thread and cannot tell you how happy it made me to read that your daughter is now being welcomed into her new home in Kappa Delta! Thank you for sharing your concerns on this board, it certainly was a good reminder to me to be as sensitive as possible in helping chapters during recruitment.
Again I extend my warmest congratulations to you, your daughter and to Kappa Delta. It was wonderful and touching to read about a mother daughter relationship like yours, you both are blessed.


Oh, and let us know how she likes bid day etc... The first semester in a sorority is sooo much fun!

I'm such a dork...i checked this thread for an update the minute I got home from work and I actually got teary eyed when i read that your daughter accepted a bid from KD! My daughter was really torn between KD and TriDelt last year and although she went TriDelt she still loves KD and has many KD friends.

So happy for both of you!

Re: advice after the cuts
 

I'm so upset to know that a fellow UGA Greek would dare to ask such a rude question as dress size or such a stereotypical one as whether curly hair indicated judaism. ::shakes head sadly::

Rush at UGA is rough and confusing. Different groups look for different things in women. I've been gone for a couple of years, so I can't really offer anything concrete as a "why" to some groups not giving invites and the ones without connections not doing it. I had at least one rec at every house when I went through at UGA, and I still got cut from 9 houses of the 18 after round one!

Did your daughter stick with rush after those cuts?

oldrusheemom, yay for your daughter! Please welcome her to our sisterhood and invite her here!

Sorry it is tacky to ask someone you don't even know their dress size! That is beyond WRONG

RusheeMom, congrats to your daughter and KD

Congratulations to the new KAPPA DELTA!
This thread was so interesting to read. I'm glad it had a happy ending.

oldrusheenowmom...I am so happy for you and your daughter - see it only took one! And may I just say, as a KD, what a good one it is!! (Sorry, not intending in any way to offend any other sorority - just always happy when I see a new KD).

And to pinkmom, I am so sorry your daughter's rush didn't work at UGA. I feel your pain and hope there are good things in store for her.

Oldrusheenowmom and KD daughter! What wonderful happy news! Might I suggest that you both plan a trip in the near future to their wonderful headquarters in Memphis Tennessee.
Another panhellenic sister! Yipee!

Let me just add my sincere congratulations to your daughter and the women of KD. Fantastic! I love a happy ending! Thanks for being so generous with your story!

Best wishes and congratulations to your daughter and Kappa Delta. The Sigma Sigma chapter at Iowa State has a long and interesting history. The 1973 KD history mentions that William C. Levere, one of the most notable SAEs, was influential in bringing KD to Iowa State, just as he had been helpful in KD's expansion to Northwestern U. a year or two before the Iowa State KDs were chartered. Fascinating bit of inter-Greek cooperation and cordial relations from nearly a century ago!

Re: Re: advice after the cuts
 

Absolutely, PinkMom! The whole idea of having an NPC is to bring peace to the whole multi-sorority concept, not rudeness. And that's EXACTLY what the statements your daughter faced were - totally rude. If they came from a sister of mine, I sincerely apologize on her behalf - and I would hope you would PM me to let me know. I would hate to think of one of my sisters behaving like that!!

As for happyoldrusheemom - congratulations to your daughter, Kappa Delta and to you, for staying the course!! You've all come out of this as one classy family!!

Yes they do! They were founded in 1900 as "Secret Sisters" (or the S.S. club) after the ban on fraternal organizations was lifted at Iowa State. They were installed as a chapter of Kappa Delta in 1908 and were allowed to keep the chapter designation "Sigma Sigma" as a testament to their original group.

More history on the ISU KD website: www.stuorg.iastate.edu/kd

didn't mean to hit enter yet...oops ;) ignore this

Oldrusheenowmom--

CONGRATULATIONS to your daughter and to KAPPA DELTA!! I hope she has a fantastic experience! I have many friends at Iowa State and I hope she loves her house as much as they all love theirs. :) You did as much as you could do as a Mom! My mom was never Greek and had to hear all about Rush every night of it last year when I'd call her...I am starting to realize how anxious she probably was too! :p

Re: Re: advice after the cuts
 

Hmmmm, I bet I know which house that was;)



Congrats to your daughter and KD!

Re: Re: Re: advice after the cuts
 

Hehe I keep forgetting that there are people on GC who probably know this stuff too. Hope I'm not sounding rude. ;)

Congrats to your daughter and to KD!!!! :)

CONGRATS!!!
 

Congrats to you and your daughter oldrusheenowmom. I am actually on my way to a Recruitment Counselor (Rho Gamma, Rho Chi, Gamma Chi...all those fun names) meeting as speak, but I read the first post and couldnt stop. As RC Coordinator and VP of Recruitment for my campus its a huge effort and I am sure the Rho Gams will LOVE a thank you card. I know I personally have spent HUNDREDS of hours on recruitment things and going to conferences (SEPC represent!!!) and typing up documents and making handbooks and coordinating publicity--but none of that even COMPARES with spending time with PNMS and helping them out and having them become devoted greeks of any chapter!

I'm so happy for your daughter. I actually really wanted Gamma Phi Beta at first but they didn't extend me a bid...so I went to Alpha Xi Delta and I am so glad! In the Greek World many times things do work out the right way on their own. No offense to GPB, but AXiD is my home and I wouldn't be the same without them--and who would of thought I didnt put them #1!!!

Re: Re: Re: Re: advice after the cuts
 

They are the ones being rude, not you. It is so sad that things have not changed, they were asking that question 15 years ago (assuming of course we are talking about the same chapter (the bank?)

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: advice after the cuts
 

This sounds a lot like a sorority at my friend's school. She was telling me how during recruitment one of the sorority's asks questions like "what do your parents do for a living?" "how do you plan on paying your dues?" "are your parents paying them for you?" etc.

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: advice after the cuts
 

YES!!!!!!! LOL. :)

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: advice after the cuts
 

I think that the sorority women could be more tactful in trying to determine if someone can afford dues... but I think it is a legit question to bring up. I'd want to make sure the people I'm trying to recruit know that there is a financial obligation and to be able to communicate to me that they can assume this obligation.

Ok, I don't post here much, but...


Souldn't it be made clear that dues are part of your expectations? Meaning, it should be said at some pre-rush orientation? In my chapter, we were very upfront--people asked, I had a sheet availble that detailed every expense for the MIT period, and what was and wasn't covered. We also told MIT's our regular chapter dues--it wasn't a secret, and we were forthcoming about the fact that we could arrange payment plans.

Also, asking what somebody's parents do, or how they plan to pay for dues is rude. Maybe the parents aren't paying (mine didn't, but mine were far less than the average NPC) Maybe the student has been saving for all of highschool--who knows, but it's nobody's busisness. As long as the chapter/school can tell you or at least give a range ($1000-15000 per sememster or whatever) then it should be assumed that the PNM in question is prepared for that part of her obligations.

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: advice after the cuts
 

That's what information sessions and open houses throughout the week are for. If the sorority does its job by correctly informing the PNM what financial responsibilities are, then if she shows back up for pref night, then that sorority should assume that she's going to be able to pay for it somehow - on her own, or with mom and dad's help. They shouldnt be asking questions like that at Pref night. It's rude and tacky.

I never said anything about asking about finances at prefs. And I think dues and obligations should be mentioned at earlier parties. Too many people-- members and PNMs-- get confused when they are shown spreadsheets with dollar signs. And many PNMs with bids have to drop later on because they weren't clear on how much and when they might have to pay for dues.

Originally posted by Lindz928
Reminds me of the house on my campus that asked everyong, "So, what does your dad do for a living?" Not mom, just dad. HOW is that at all relevant to whether or not a girl will be at home in your house??? Beats me. I just thought it seemed spoiled and materialistic.

*********************

An Alpha Gam told me that someone in another NPC group asked her that.

She replied, "He owns a car wash." She did NOT add that in fact he owned an entire chain of car washes in addition to considerable real estate and other enterprises in southern California.

AGDAlum

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: advice after the cuts
 

There was a sorority at my school which immediately asked your parents' names, as someone ran a Dun & Bradstreet on your family!! :eek:

Once enough people complained about it, they started adding the costs to the Recruitment Brochure, and during second rounds, one sister was to explain all obligations to a PNM. That would include the financial end (dues, initiation fees, and a ballpark figure of what a New Member could expect to pay for "goodies"), and whether or not you had to live in the suite, and how long.

<sarcasm>Of course it's not mom, just dad. The only possible reason that a married woman would have a job, is if her husband doesn't make enough money. :rolleyes: </sarcasm>

Anyway, in terms of costs... GLO membership isn't cheap. Costs should be disclosed up-front to the PNMs, and the PNMs should then decide for themselves whether they can handle the financial obligations. Sororities shouldn't be making that decision for the PNMs by cutting those women who they think can't afford dues.

oldrusheenowmom, congrats to your daughter. :)

Jocelyn, we did something similar at my school. There was no formal presentation, but each sorority printed up half-sheets with a full breakdown of dues, so PNMs would know exactly what they'd owe for their new-member semester and subsequent semesters. These papers were set out at every round except pref, and PNMs were free to take and keep them (this was the only thing PNMs could take out of the rush rooms). This way, PNMs were fully informed and could decide for themselves whether they could afford dues and how they would get the money (ask mom and dad, get a job, etc).

But at some schools, it's taboo to ask about dues. The implication is "if you have to ask, you can't afford it."