Can you have sex in your letters? Like just wearing a top or something?

Although, you might be really bad in bed and then you would give XYZ everywhere a bad name . . .. ;)

actually some sisters and I were talking about the whole sex in letters thing the other day... yeah we came to the conclusion that lavaliers are damn tricky to remember to take off....you just forget you're wearing it. I don't know about the whole issue of respect or what not... but I don't doubt that it happens.... I would venture that having sex in some sort of para. isn't as bad as some other things people may do in letters...

What about people who have their letters tattooed on them? Do they have to take a vow never, ever to drink, smoke, have sex, etc?

If the not wearing letters when doing morally questionable activity in public is the issue.. well are they having sex in public?

If not, it's like that whole tree falling in the forest and no one hearing it question.

..... which is why there are many orgs. that just say, "NO org-related tattoos, thanks." Chi O may be one of them (any Chi Os know for sure?) but Phi Mu doesn't, unfortunately, have a national policy on this.

Anyone remember the sorority member who appeared in Playboy, complete with tattoo?

There is no National Policy in APO regarding this, just a very widespread and accepted tradition not to drink while in letters or in any fraternity insignia.

Most Brothers and Chapters accept this, but some don't.

I have never been asked on any application forms if I smoke (I believe that is a question you are forbidden to asnwer, like race, religion, marital status, etc...). I doubt I have ever been turned down for a job because I am a smoker.
But I have never asked to leave an interview to go for a smoke.
How long is the interview anyway? If it's really long I would think the employer would give you a break.

Nope. I'm a part of Hermandad de Sigma Iota Alpha, Inc. We can't drink in our letters. Why would you want to?

I am almost sure that solo-self-stimulating-eroticism is not allowed in letters or near letters.

Hmmm... well I am quite sure that would be next to impossible to regulate. Unless someone walked in on you and then I think that last thing on either of your minds would be that you were wearing letters during the act :p

There is no national rule in Theta Phi Alpha saying we aren't allowed to drink in our letters. I think that we are the only national Panhelenic sorority that allows it. Out of respect and courtesy for other chapters, we do not drink when we have shirts with their letters on them (like UC sorority recruitment tees) since those chapters have rules against it. Of course we are definitely not allowed to drink in our letters if we are under 21. Also I'm pretty sure we aren't allowed to drink with our badges on.

i'll delete this post in a few minutes... but :rolleyes:

http://www.dotphoto.com/SAN1/81/B4/4...740A1D4D37.jpg

I'd be interested in knowing about the tattoo prohibition. I've mentioned before about a question concerning debrasion - I think it's a very valid discussion!

Back to drinking: what would y'all think of a few alumnae getting together after visiting a chapter or such, they're wearing laveliers or similar "small" letters (ring?), and they stop for dinner and maybe a glass of wine?

The alumnae are all over 21 so I don't think that there's anything wrong with that. Plus, I somehow seriously doubt that if you have a bunch of alumnae get together and go out for dinner, that they're going to get so drunk that they're going to do anything that would give the sorority/chapter a bad name.

"The alumnae are all over 21 so I don't think that there's anything wrong with that. Plus, I somehow seriously doubt that if you have a bunch of alumnae get together and go out for dinner, that they're going to get so drunk that they're going to do anything that would give the sorority/chapter a bad name."

I agree. I think theres a difference between having a glass of wine with dinner, and doing a kegstand or being blatantly drunk in public. Theres also a difference between being over 21, or not.

I personally think that you shouldn't wear letters if you plan on getting drunk or doing anything you wouldnt want associated with your sorority....

Ladies, that's my thought. One of the alumnae involved violently disagreed, and the rest of us somewhat ignored her. I don't know about most alumnae that help out with a chapter, but after a few hours of same, a little wine with dinner is vastly preferred to a lot of "whine" with dinner!

Does your headquarters have any specific rules that apply also to alum when it comes to alcohol? Maybe it's something that the alumnae in question should review/take a look at? I don't know.........

drink drank drunk
 

In Phi Mu we are not allowed to drink in letters. Actually none of the sororities are. The Fraternity's drink in letters. I dunno i think it's one of those things where it's okay for guys but not for girls.

Our policy states, in reference to alumnae, that alchohol is only prohibited during meetings where ritual is involved. We'll often have wine at our social gatherings and I think everyone has been okay with that.

If I were going out with my husband or a small group of friends and had a few drinks with dinner, I would feel okay with wearing my crest ring or letter bracelet.

If I were going out to the bar with a group of friends and know I'm going with the intent of having a very good time, I wouldn't not wear anything that could associate me with my fraternity.

Maybe it's my age, but I have some pretty vivid mental images of my ASA sisters cursing, drinking AND smoking all at the same time in eye-catching red-and-white sweatshirts!

One of the most prolific cursers was Meg - when the quietest, sweetest girl in the sorority drew her name and had to portray her in the Senior Skit, she came into the suite dropping the f-bomb right and left - immediately everyone knew who she was supposed to be and yelled "Meg!!!"

Cut to 10 years later, and she's now a Main Line Matron, , complaining about the beach house her family had rented - there were college students next door and they CURSED!!! Can you believe it!!

We had to remind her that there were few truck drivers with more colorful vocabularies than Meg " yeah, you and horse you rode in on" Rector.

But I'm with Sheila (maybe because this isn't a big national policy with us). People know what sorority you're in, letters or not - better to have a few beers and behave kindly than be letter-free and a total bitch.

That's not me, I swear! :p (No, it really isn't. If that girl is a collegian, her @$$ should be hauled before standards.)

As I've mentioned before on this thread, our rule is no drinking in letters. If you are underage you shouldn't be drinking, period, as all AEPhis are expected to abide by federal, state/province, local, and university laws, including the drinking age.

For alums it's more relaxed (mainly b/c we can't get called to standards ;) ), but I don't wear anything associated with AEPhi if I'm drinking. I won't even wear letters when I go to the liquor store.

As far as is there something written down, I don't think so, but it can fall under that very large umbrella of "inappropriate activities." And as we know, every chapter and every sister has different definitions of "inappropriate."

I think this didn't start till around 92-93, because before that we had consultants in the house who saw us go out to bars/parties in letters and didn't say a word.

The only disgraceful thing about that picture of the woman in the beer hat is the fact that she's drinking Coors. Ew.

I'm really with 33girl on this one -- I'd be much more worried about someone wearing my letters and acting a fool that I would be worried about someone having a drink. Drinking is not inherently disrespectful to anyone -- acting like an idiot is, whether you're drunk or not. Maybe people just feel like "don't act like an ass" is too vague so they try to regulate what they can.

Sigma Alpha Iota and Phi Mu Alpha
 

I can't speak for Kappa Kappa Psi or music fraternities other than SAI and PMA, but I know we're DRY fraternities. We're not allowed to drink at fraternitity functions including socials (I know many PMA chapters break this rule, and I know some who have been disaffiliated for it); we're not allowed to spend fraternity funds on alcohol. Other than that, we are allowed to drink in our letters, but it is not encouraged to be drunk in them. This means it is perfectly acceptable to wear your lavaliere at a restaurant or even your badge while drinking wine, but it's icky to be lewd and obnoxious while wearing them. I was just talking to my PO about this last weekend. :)

LOL, that's exactly what Mr. 33 would say.

I know that Tau Delta's rule is NO DRINKING IN LETTERS! If you have your lavalier on, tuck it in your shirt or take it off. If there is a chance of you acting stupid...NOT IN YOUR LETTERS. We really aren't supposed to go to parties in our letters. I have a couple of times, but I have never and will never drink as a matter of personal morality, and I'm usually there to pick someone up.

I used to go to parties mostly to pick someone up, too. Probably a good reason NOT to wear my letters...

Re: Sigma Alpha Iota and Phi Mu Alpha
 

Tau Beta Sigma and Kappa Kappa Psi have dry rules for official functions as well, including socials (some of the alumni who came back for our chapter's 20th anniversary were not happy with the rule... but hey, we have members who aren't yet legal in attendance). No chapter funds on alcohol.

Otherwise, it's pretty much the same as PMA.

~ Mel.

I've drank in my DG thong before. :(

Thats a Christian club right? Didn't Christ drink wine when everyone knew who he was?

How odd they would take that viewpoint.

I think that if this stuff crosses your mind as a concern, you and your friends have had amazingly problem free lives and need to try and focus on more important stuff lol :)

Or she just wants to make sure she promotes her org. in a good way.

lay off.

I think by the time you are an alumnus, most of us have gone through so much "training" that we all feel weird about drinking in letters, unless we know for a fact that it's completely appropriate. I went out the other night after work, and all I had with me was a t-shirt with my letters on it... I made sure to sit so noone could read them! I know that noone would care (especially cause this was a po-dunk bar in Lake Wylie that most people going to wouldn't have even gone to college... much less been in a sorority/fraternity to be able to "judge" someone for drinking in letters) but it still made me feel weird.

You also don't know why the woman discussed was in a Standards Hearing! ;)

Other peoples' lives are always better or worse than someone else's.

You weren't JUST in your thong, were you? I mean, if so, this is a COMPLETELY different standards issue. ;)

btw honey- KD does have a no-tattoo rule. No letters or crest. Girls a lot of times get daggers or shamrocks instead

What would happen if a girl was unaware of this rule and got a tatoo with letters on it? Would nationals make her get it removed?
ETA: Does a tatoo of AOT fall under the "no letters" rule?

Good idea! I need to get a ruling on this for ADPi - I honestly don't know.