I realize that this thread is very old, but if we're reviving the discussion...when I was in college, I was NOT doing the same thing those pregnant girls did. I was using two reliable methods of birth control, correctly, every time. They work. You can tell me all you want about how you were taking that pill religiously and the condom just broke without warning...yeah, right. If that's true, then you're the only one. 99% of these "oops!" pregnancies would have been prevented if the parties had taken the simplest precautions.

So it's not about people having sex. It's about people having reckless, irresponsible sex. If a person is reckless and irresponsible about bringing a human being into this world -- which is by far the biggest thing she will ever do -- then I think it's quite fair for others to wonder whether she'll be reckless and irresponsible about other things, too.

This sounds like "judgement" to me. How can you speak for other people's circumstances and situations? The world is different and so are the youth and some just need that guidance but don't assume because it didn't happen to you that you are the expert. *ish happens...right???;)

Hmm that sounds kinds harsh. So all the people who have irresposnible reckless sex who don't get pregnant, what category do they fall up under? :confused:

You know...I'd actually have to argue that your diligence and consistency is/was quite a rare occurrence as well.

Unlike you...there are many young ladies who simply aren't strong enough to say "No!" to unprotected sex...every time. They most certainly are taking a roll of the dice, but you'd be surprised how many smart, contributing, wonderful, and committed women make that mistake everyday. To the point of the poster that you were responding to, it may just be that these ladies are unfortunate enough to have the visible results of that 'mistake'.

Well, sure. But the thread is about deciding who gets into your organization and who doesn't. That's inherently a judgmental process, just like when you hire an employee. You have to judge whether this person has the values, maturity, etc. to be trusted with that responsiblity. I don't presume to know the criteria for becoming an AKA or other D9 member, but lots of people don't meet the standard, right?

The same category, of course -- it's just that other people usually won't know unless one of the partners tells the world (people sometimes do brag about this kind of thing). But that doesn't mean you have to ignore this information if it does come your way.

All too true. But that's also the case with academics. Only a small minority of young people in this country enroll in college, make good grades, and graduate. Yet we don't hesitate to limit our search to successful college graduates when we're selecting employees (or members of elite organizations).

Actually, a friend of mine was pregnant when she went through her MIP; however, she did not know. Her graduate advisor was livid because she did not want it to appear that the woman who were joining the organization did not uphold the goals of the sorority (at least that's what my friend said). Another friend of mine was actually 8 mos pregnant when she finished her MIP; however, she is a married woman. I would think if a woman was married, and she happened to be with child, that it would be fine for her to seek membership (especially since the graduate chapter is by invitation only).

I dont see why MIP while pregnant should matter. If you are dedicated to serving your communtity and feel as though you have something to offer to the organization then what difference should it make. There have been sorors who have done far worse things than getting pregnant who have pledged and were great assets to the sorority.

I must be "old school"
 

I didn't get to see the original question(was it deleted by the OP?).

I'm sure that depends upon both the individual and the chapter. As to whether someone should entertain the idea, I think it's not a good idea especially at the undergraduate level. Being young, a student and a soon-to-be mother are a lot on a person's plate. If asked, I would advise a young lady to wait until her child is born and older and she finishes school so she is more financially stable. My views don't change even if the young lady is married, but I'd especially advise young single moms-to-be to wait.

As to grad chapter, if a young lady were financially stable and pregnant(single OR married), if she possessed the qualities of a qualified candidate, I'd advise her to go for it after her baby is born and is a year or older. I know young married woman in this position and I advised her to wait.

As another poster stated, an invitation to membership is a privilege, not a right. Pregnancy and motherhood to an infant are both physically taxing and emotionally demanding, as active membership in a sorority can be as well. Trying to tackle both as an undergrad while being a student AND a mother (whose first priority should be her child) might be unfair to the chapter, her co-initiates/line sisters and the child. Additionally, the child will only be an infant for so long and those moments with the child are precious and fleeting. If she really wants it, AKA can wait and graduate chapter is always an option down the road.

As to my personal views on the married candidate vs. single candidate, I'm definitely "old school".

One must always think about the child's welfare in any situation; that is paramount. However, if you feel like you can handle both MIP and the child, and if a chapter has extended to you an invitation, then go for it.

I've read some of the posts, and I'm not sure about what the issue is. Is it that morally people shouldn't be trying to join if they are unwed and pregnant, or is it a concern about the physical rigors and how that might be impacted with a pregnancy?

I have a friend who crossed DST at a school (years ago) and one of her linesisters was pregnant during the entire process. She even stepped and never had any problems. That being said, everyone can't do that. I personally would not advise someone who is pregnant to try and go through initiation until after they have the baby. Safety and health come first.

This statement bothers me. Did she perform community service and keep up her studies without any problems?

^^I think that she mentions the stepping specifically because of the physical rigor of the activity, which might impact a pregnancy; not because stepping is the central focus of being in an organization.

I don't know where I fall on this question. I was recently talking to a cousin who, once upon a time, had organizational aspirations. She has two small children (under 5) and she was saying that it was too late for her. While I don't think that it is too late--I had linesisters in their 50s and 60s--I do know that if I were in her place, I wouldn't try to pledge right now. The time commitment of being new to an organization (let alone an MIP) would have been something that I would not have wanted to take on with two young children and certainly not with a new born. But that is my personal preference.

I might add more later. I have been thinking about this question since this thread reappeared.

Why does the statement bother you? If you read it in the context of the rest of my post you will see that, as Little32 pointed out, I was referring to the physical rigor of the activity.

I think as aspirants we need to remember this. If you are pregnant, all you can do is apply. Either they will say yes, or they will say no. :cool:

Welp with that being said, its time to close this thread! :)