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-   -   Should we change the way PNMs think of Recruitment? (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=125239)

Low D Flat 06-30-2014 05:54 PM

This thread is awesome for giving us the evocative term "Foofoo High."

exlurker 06-30-2014 07:14 PM

(see quote below; I know, this is one of GC's older threads):

For Fall 2014 Dartmouth's Panhel is reportedly going to give PNMs more information on how recruitment works. A few other changes are supposedly coming, too.

See

http://thedartmouth.com/2014/05/27/n...arency-in-rush

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06 (Post 2129762)

Yes, they do.

I've been saying forever that selection is a lot less mutual than I think Panhellenics lead PNMs to believe. It tips considerably in the chapter's favor.

This goes along with PNMs consistently saying "I cut XYZ this round" not fully understanding that they aren't cutting anyone.

I think I had to make a thread about that once because I got sick of PNMs thinking that.

That's why there's so much "OMGWTFBBQ" when a chapter shows up on their list that they ranked low or they end up with a bid from their 2nd choice. They aren't aware that selection isn't as mututal as it is portrayed. There'd be a lot less of that if the process were presented realistically.


33girl 06-30-2014 09:12 PM

Dartmouth is a weird animal, and I really dislike the every girl will go back to 4 chapters whether they want her or not part. My fear is that the local groups who don't have an HQ to stick up for them regarding the groups' right to MS will get stuck with a bunch of girls the other groups cut. That's not really fair.

carnation 06-30-2014 09:57 PM

33, that happened at you-know-where one year.

austennn 07-16-2014 01:24 AM

I definitely think some PNM's are misinformed about how the process works. I constantly hear girls talk about how they're "rushing XYZ." Like, no. You're not "rushing" anyone. They always seem to be confused as to how they can rank a house last every single day and still get invited back to them, and sometimes even get a bid from them. PNM's need to get off their high horses. You can't walk around like you're better than it all and that everyone should worship the ground you walk on.

If EVERY chapter really, really wants you, then you can be selective and have a little more of a right to have an inflated ego, but that very rarely happens. You're more than likely going to get cut by some houses you like and invited back to some you don't. Don't act like you're too good to go to a house you ranked last. Every chapter has something special to offer.

als463 07-16-2014 08:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by austennn (Post 2281241)
I definitely think some PNM's are misinformed about how the process works. I constantly hear girls talk about how they're "rushing XYZ." Like, no. You're not "rushing" anyone. They always seem to be confused as to how they can rank a house last every single day and still get invited back to them, and sometimes even get a bid from them. PNM's need to get off their high horses. You can't walk around like you're better than it all and that everyone should worship the ground you walk on.

If EVERY chapter really, really wants you, then you can be selective and have a little more of a right to have an inflated ego, but that very rarely happens. You're more than likely going to get cut by some houses you like and invited back to some you don't. Don't act like you're too good to go to a house you ranked last. Every chapter has something special to offer.

If only there was a blog these young ladies could read regarding recruitment... :rolleyes:

33girl 07-16-2014 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by als463 (Post 2281270)
If only there was a blog these young ladies could read regarding recruitment... :rolleyes:

I KNOW!!! Wouldn't that be super turbo awesome???!? Gosh gollykins, it would just be the most best magnificent thing EVER.

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnation (Post 2279506)
33, that happened at you-know-where one year.

The T word? Or the you-know-where in your hood?

33girl 06-28-2015 01:03 PM

Just to touch on one of melindawarren's comments, I think that the concept of a girl not being a fit for a chapter specifically, but not being a fit for the school IN GENERAL happens a lot more than people realize. If you've busted your butt getting into your "dream school" and get there and it doesn't feel right, it might be easier to blame it on a bad rush result.

carnation 12-26-2015 09:38 AM

This thread has some great points!

carnation 07-23-2017 09:58 AM

TTT!

clemsongirl 07-23-2017 11:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 2319136)
Just to touch on one of melindawarren's comments, I think that the concept of a girl not being a fit for a chapter specifically, but not being a fit for the school IN GENERAL happens a lot more than people realize. If you've busted your butt getting into your "dream school" and get there and it doesn't feel right, it might be easier to blame it on a bad rush result.

Ooh, this made me think. Sometimes I think going through rush at a school you're iffy on is like having a baby to make a relationship work-you're committing yourself to something much more permanent and odds are the inevitable "breakup", so to speak, will be much messier than if you'd separated sooner. Few things evoke more sympathy from me than a student going through recruitment at a school they may not stay at, getting a bid and getting initiated, then transferring to a place with no chapter and being completely disconnected from the undergraduate Greek experience around them.

1964Alum 07-24-2017 01:19 AM

It is important for EVERY PNM to remember, starting before recruitment even begins, that it is the sororities that give the invitations to each and every party, not the PNM! It doesn't matter how much in demand you might be. Or think you might be. What DOES matter is that you remain humble and appreciative of every invitation you get. As my grandmother used to say, "Asking makes a difference!"

33girl 07-24-2017 07:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by clemsongirl (Post 2436774)
Ooh, this made me think. Sometimes I think going through rush at a school you're iffy on is like having a baby to make a relationship work-you're committing yourself to something much more permanent and odds are the inevitable "breakup", so to speak, will be much messier than if you'd separated sooner. Few things evoke more sympathy from me than a student going through recruitment at a school they may not stay at, getting a bid and getting initiated, then transferring to a place with no chapter and being completely disconnected from the undergraduate Greek experience around them.

This is why I hate when one of the rationales used for pre-freshman rush is "it makes you feel at home at the school!" Well yes, it can make things seem smaller & easier to handle (especially at a huge state flagship) but the fact of the matter is, you aren't doing sorority 24/7. You still have to attend large classes. You still have to navigate a campus that may be bigger than your home town. This goes both ways of course - entering a prestigious yet tiny liberal arts school may make people from large high schools chafe at the degree of coziness. And I haven't even touched on hating your major.

But you don't know any of that if you go through rush before you've even had one college class.

SWTXBelle 07-24-2017 07:18 PM

Ah, but if you are in a sorority, you are attending large classes - with your sisters, or with the support of your sisters. You still have to navigate a campus bigger than your hometown - with the help of your sisters. You might hate your major- but you have sisters to commiserate with you. In a way, you ARE "doing sorority" 24/7. You don't get to avoid possible negative experiences - but you get to go through them with the help, support, and knowledge of your chapter.

FSUZeta 07-24-2017 07:35 PM

Hear, hear!

carnation 07-06-2019 10:09 PM

Let's bump this one for 2019! There's some good debating in it.

33girl 07-07-2019 10:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle (Post 2436841)
Ah, but if you are in a sorority, you are attending large classes - with your sisters, or with the support of your sisters. You still have to navigate a campus bigger than your hometown - with the help of your sisters. You might hate your major- but you have sisters to commiserate with you. In a way, you ARE "doing sorority" 24/7. You don't get to avoid possible negative experiences - but you get to go through them with the help, support, and knowledge of your chapter.

Oh good, I can finish my thought :)

Yes, sisters help lessen the bad experiences, but the things I mentioned AREN’T “bad” experiences, they’re just things that are. If you keep saying “well I hate the huge classes (or its flipside, how tiny this school is)/my major/the climate/the surrounding town, but my sorority is 100% awesome!” - I mean, how many things does your GLO have to help you put up with? How much freight does it have to carry? Maybe sometimes it is just getting used to a new environment, but a lot of times that school is just NOT for you.

I would hate to feel “trapped” in a school that I otherwise hated simply because of my devotion to my sisters.

33girl 07-07-2019 10:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby (Post 2130046)
I also wonder if it hurts the weaker chapters that the top X number are all #1, and then the "back-ups" are ranked. Basically, the PNM's have to think about which chapters they like the least, but not which chapters they like the best. It's subtle, but I think that it makes PNM's really focus on the bad.

I see the point and guess it would be better to tell them to give each one a number rank, but when we’re talking about schools with 16+ chapters that would be a head spinning nightmare.

Quote:

Originally Posted by ellebud (Post 2130514)
I think that so much depends on the individual. The Reluctant One was/is very secure. She truly didn't care about the tiers. She ranked several top houses below a top three house

BUT there are those young women (one of whom I wrote about in my story so many years ago) for whom it is top tier or out. I think that it would be very interesting to see statistics on who drops out of recruitment and when....at the end...after a top 3 non invitation...or do the pnms "stick it out"?

I wish that it could/should be stressed that you will have a social life. You will make friends...whatever house you join or don't join. A friend of one of my kids makes a fabulous presentation. She's gorgeous. She dresses amazingly well. She is from a well placed family. And for an hour she can hold it together: she is the biggest dork in the world.

She is a smart dork. She pledged a "low tier" house. Her rho chi was baffled. The girl knew herself.

Unfortunately not everyone has that knowledge the minute they step on campus. Going through rush as a sophomore, the dismissive attitude of the “top” chapter on my campus just made me laugh to myself at how much they were conforming to stereotype. Had I experienced it as a brand-new freshman, it would have devastated me.


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