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-   -   Sorors, SFs, One & All (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=11591)

TRYIN HARD 03-22-2008 10:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ladygreek (Post 1622169)
^^^ First of all you responded to a post that is a year old. Second, you have made some bad assumptions. Third, and yes I am insensitive, someone with an attitude like yours needs not to join any BGLO. And last, maybe you should transfer to a PWI.

So, and I don't care if it is a year old. I haven't made any bad assumptions, I have seen these things happen to people that's all. But, I'm the one with the attitude.

rhoyaltempest 03-22-2008 10:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TRYIN HARD (Post 1622183)
So, and I don't care if it is a year old. I haven't made any bad assumptions, I have seen these things happen to people that's all. But, I'm the one with the attitude.

Have some respect please. You can't insult members of an organization and expect them not to respond. Whatever you observed at your school is only hearsay to the members here and you can't say anything about a membership intake process being petty or BS since you haven't gone thru such a process yourself.

Also, many of the members on this board are not undergrads. Many are alumnae members, some of which who have been active in their organizations for 15, 20, 30 years and you could learn a whole lot from them. Our members are different people with different opinions so just because someone says something that you don't like, it doesn't mean you should attack the entire organization. I take it that you joined greekchat to interact with members of the organization that you one day hope to be a part of. Don't mess that up.

pinkies up 03-22-2008 10:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TRYIN HARD (Post 1622160)
Also, I must add everyone knows for a fact that some girls have all the credentials and are not chosen simply because someone doesn't like them. At an HBCU girls were so petty. Some girls didn't get chosen because they dated an Alpha, or the ex-boyfriend of a Delta, because they were overweight, etc. I also knew a girl that was on line to be a Delta, while running to be the university queen. After she lost the competition the Deltas dropped her from her line, as if to say we don't want a loser on our line. All of you can deny it, but a lot of pettiness goes along with this process, and I hate to say it, but it's because women are known for being catty and hatin' on one another. Don't get me wrong, I think your organization is filled with greatness, but the pledging process for all GLO is often filled with a lot of BS.

As my sistergreeks have already stated, you aren't helping your case AT ALL. You have a bad taste in your mouth because you can't deal with rejection. It's a part of life and while I didn't receive a rejection letter, there have been times when I was rejected. Did I come to post my disgust of the GAP, or it's affiliates? The first undergraduate university I applied to? The first job I interviewed for? NO. Rejection means look and see what you need to improve upon and if it's for you or in your heart, try again. :cool:

ladygreek 03-23-2008 04:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TRYIN HARD (Post 1622183)
So, and I don't care if it is a year old. I haven't made any bad assumptions, I have seen these things happen to people that's all. But, I'm the one with the attitude.

Based on what you posted you have made some bad assumptions. Unless you were behind the closed doors of the chapter, you are missing vital background information. And there are always two, sometimes three sides to a story.

Oh and very honestly, I am being nice.

AKA_Monet 03-23-2008 05:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CrimsonTide4 (Post 114803)
Hello Everyone,
It is that time of the year again. Some prospectives are getting acceptance letters and others are being rejected.

I have some questions for ALL BGLO sorority members. Did YOU join your sorority through a collegiate or alumnae chapter?

Undergraduate chapter at Spelman College in 1989.


Quote:

Originally Posted by CrimsonTide4 (Post 114803)
To ALL BGLO Sorority members, what advice would you give those who were not chosen this year for membership?

Take it from someone who really knows... ;) Your slate must be cleaned and cleared from all blemishes on anyone's record and what anyone says--loose lips sinks ships... Be careful of the company you keep you never know who might be watching...

And it is like a career without retirement, if you want it, you best be out there, visibly enthralled with the magnitude of the organization. That takes research, searching for answers, and knowing conflict resolution, organizational management and parliamentary/operational procedures.

A one time dose of membership intake activities will NEVER prepare you for a lifetime of membership!!! But going to chapter meetings, conferences both regional/national, etc. will... And paying all your required assessments.

When called, will you be there?

If you are looking to have a bunch a friends to kick it with that has this one kind of thing in common, wow, dude, you need to have more of a life...

onetruediva1913 03-28-2008 06:11 AM

I joined Delta as a undergrad and would not trade my experience for the WORLD!

As far as the rejection letters I encourage people to try again and just make sure that you are on point. Sometimes you may have to look at your attitude to see why you did not get in. As a past chapter president I have had to put my john hancock on many rejection letters so I know how the whole process goes of having to send the dreaded letter. But please do not be discouraged as i stated before just try again. If DST is in your heart nothing or no one can stop you from getting to your goal.

treblk 03-30-2008 11:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TRYIN HARD (Post 1622155)
I read most of the posts in this thread and as a non-Delta/"wannabe" or whatever, I must say your comments were very insensitive. At one time in your life you were a non-Delta/"wannabe"/prospective or whatever, how would you have felt if you never made a line. I must also say that I attended a large HBCU in the south where competition was fierce to pledge. I did not actively pursue my interests because I was struggling financially, constantly switching my major, and almost transferred schools. Nevertheless, when the Deltas at my school finally crossed after being on probation for several years, I was astonished. I knew many girls on the line that smoked weed, constantly cheated in class, and DID NOT DO PUBLIC SERVICE! In fact many of them told me personally how they'd lied and gotten fake letters written indicating that they had done community service. Furthermore, so many of them are inactive now it is ridiculous. I guess I'm writing this to say, what happened to putting yourself in the shoes of others. I understand the greek "I've got what you want, so I'm better" attitude, but my goodness! I have never attended a rush, but would like to someday. I have had no luck in finding out about the activities for prospectives in my area, but hopefully one day I will, but if I encounter some of the negative personalities on this forum it is an organization I'd choose not to pursue.

I'm just now seeing this and since my Soror and Sistergreeks have all chimed in..all I can type to you is...
we all have our opinions...

onetruediva1913 03-30-2008 11:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TRYIN HARD (Post 1622160)
Also, I must add everyone knows for a fact that some girls have all the credentials and are not chosen simply because someone doesn't like them. At an HBCU girls were so petty. Some girls didn't get chosen because they dated an Alpha, or the ex-boyfriend of a Delta, because they were overweight, etc. I also knew a girl that was on line to be a Delta, while running to be the university queen. After she lost the competition the Deltas dropped her from her line, as if to say we don't want a loser on our line. All of you can deny it, but a lot of pettiness goes along with this process, and I hate to say it, but it's because women are known for being catty and hatin' on one another. Don't get me wrong, I think your organization is filled with greatness, but the pledging process for all GLO is often filled with a lot of BS.

So I really want to respond sensibly however I think right now you are very BITTER with rejection so you probably would be on the defense about anything I say so with that being said I will try to respond to the best of my ability. If you were not chosen for the line at your school for whatever reason it is something you have to deal with.Either you try again or you sit back and hate on those who made it. However commenting on a PLEDGE PROCESS you clearly know NOTHING about is not the way to get my sorors or anyone else to offer advice that may help you in your quest to greekdom.

neosoul 03-31-2008 09:49 PM

I'm a day late and a dollar short but here are my responses:

Did YOU join your sorority through a collegiate or alumnae chapter?

Graduate (Alumnae) Chapter


For those who joined via the ALUMNAE chapter,
A. Did you apply for membership during your college years?

no, the school I went to had a chapter that was extinct (all the members had graduated)

B. While waiting for the chance to join, what did you do in the meantime?

got my Bachelors, moved to DC, moved back to VA, went back to grad school, and developed emotionally, mentally and spiritually.

C. While others around you were becoming members, how did you stay focused on the mission of joining the sisterhood that you felt lead to pursue?

I knew my time was coming, even though I was rejected and had to wait for a year before I could become a member, I JUST knew it was coming, and I'd like to think life before Zeat prepared me for life WITH Zeta. Now I can take sisterly or unsisterly correction without thinking folks are hating, I can appreciate the work that Zeta does for her community, and the business aspect of sorority life.

Zeta enriches my life but it doesn't consume it, and I can honestly say that if I never had an opportunity to be a Zeta, I would still live a fulfilling life... just a little less satisfying and a little less dull with no royal blue and white to brighten up my days :)

true_story 04-01-2008 02:27 AM

For my SFs who are waiting/hoping to become a member what are you doing to keep your interests and to increase your attractiveness?


Hello to all. I am new on GC and just wanted to respond to some of the discussions. So... for the past three years I have just been gathering my information and being patient. I have had an educational journey on BGLOs and the history of African Americans, both men and women. Unfortunately, my mother did not attend college therefore, as a freshman, I did not know ANYTHING about sororities. Nonetheless, the organizations attracted my attention. In terms of what I am doing to keep my interest- I feel that if your heart is really into becoming an influential member of an organization, then your interest will always be there. Despite rejection and obstacles, a true passion for something (in this case, sorority) will prevail no matter what. Also, in terms of what I am doing to increase my attractiveness- just being myself. I myself, would not be attracted to an organization unless it resembled some part of me. I have always loved working with people and helping people so being apart of service organizations on campus and actively participating in community service is only natural. Furthermore, I stay optimistic and carry myself in a positive manner, although I can have my days, I do not let it affect others. Thank you to anyone who read my post (although a little long) and hope to see you around the forums!

AKA_Monet 04-01-2008 03:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by true_story (Post 1627226)
For my SFs who are waiting/hoping to become a member what are you doing to keep your interests and to increase your attractiveness?


Hello to all. I am new on GC and just wanted to respond to some of the discussions. So... for the past three years I have just been gathering my information and being patient. I have had an educational journey on BGLOs and the history of African Americans, both men and women. Unfortunately, my mother did not attend college therefore, as a freshman, I did not know ANYTHING about sororities. Nonetheless, the organizations attracted my attention. In terms of what I am doing to keep my interest- I feel that if your heart is really into becoming an influential member of an organization, then your interest will always be there. Despite rejection and obstacles, a true passion for something (in this case, sorority) will prevail no matter what. Also, in terms of what I am doing to increase my attractiveness- just being myself. I myself, would not be attracted to an organization unless it resembled some part of me. I have always loved working with people and helping people so being apart of service organizations on campus and actively participating in community service is only natural. Furthermore, I stay optimistic and carry myself in a positive manner, although I can have my days, I do not let it affect others. Thank you to anyone who read my post (although a little long) and hope to see you around the forums!

Wow!!! :) It has been a very long time since I have seen such pleasant and positive post as this. Which ever organization extends an invitation for you to join you will be an asset to it...

I'm thinking International Chaplain or some high level host... ;)

ahh1913 04-01-2008 08:52 PM

Wonderful topic.....

I crossed over into Delta-Land while an undergraduate. But my journey was unique--My school Private HBCU did not have a chapter. So a few of us went on a quest (LOL) to find out how we could become the first greek letter chapter on the campus and DST was the ONLY WAY. The journey was hard, exhaustive and fulfilling all at the same time. We belonged to a social organization on our campus that was being advised by a soror. She helped us along the way. IT took more than a year of introductions and proving ourselves to one of the local college campuses. We did alot of work and preparation before even being considered for regional initiation. After the regional conference we came back to campus and worked hard to charter a chapter. It still has not happened.....but the seed was planted!!

What I find interesting; after also pledging a few lines undergraduate and graduate...you can see the interests who have Delta in their heart!! There is something very sincere about them --- and you can tell that they are determined to make their dream a reality. I will continue to welcome new sorors (undergraduate and graduate) who will work for Delta and remain true to her goals.

P.S. Is anyone working with Project ACE in their chapter?

true_story 04-02-2008 01:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AKA_Monet (Post 1627522)
Wow!!! :) It has been a very long time since I have seen such pleasant and positive post as this. Which ever organization extends an invitation for you to join you will be an asset to it...

I'm thinking International Chaplain or some high level host... ;)


Thank you love, I appreciate it. If I am blessed and do become a member of an organization, you will be the first on GC to know about it! LOL

pyt4christ 04-24-2008 09:38 PM

I did not pursue membership this year, but I have in the past, so here it goes......

I've been interested in Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Incorporated since before I got to college. I did a lot of research and found that the sorority's ideals and goals largely matched with mine. I respected the women who fought for a future they probably realized wouldn't come in their lifetimes...but they fought. They fought for ME! I also liked what DST was doing in the present tense- from the Summits to the Thrusts, I was enamored with the idea of becoming a member. And then there were the campus programs--fantastic!

I expressed my interest and was fortunate enough to be given "the time of day." However, for personal "such is life" reasons I was not able to become a member. Missing out on that opportunity was tough, DEFINITELY! I mean it hurt...Bad!

By the time I had graduated college, I had a 3.6 GPA, and degree in hand, had awesome experiences including receiving one of the top leadership awards at my school, teaching a couple of classes, leading an organization on campus as president, and securing a full-time job.

I did service in my community because I wanted to serve. I focused on having a good GPA because it reflected on me. I sought after opportunities for ME and not necessarily to prepare myself for an ogranization (even though I always knew I wanted to pursue). Now that I am out of college, my interest is still as strong as it ever has been! I'm just continuing to do what I love...serving others and getting better at being me.

If my goal is to work hard just so I can get into DST, what will happen if/when I finally reach my goal and am invited into the sisterhood? I want to work hard because there is WORK to be done. So, I keep pressing on....

~Pretty Young Thing For Christ (that's me!)

blakiceanjel 05-01-2008 03:15 PM

I love this thread! It is such an inspiration to see so many success stories and the stories of persistence also. I knew nothing of BGLOs before I started college as neither of my parents went to a university. I started my collegiate experience at one school and I was impressed at a particular sorority's involvement on campus. I went to many programs, not because I was seeking membership but because I was genuinely interested in what they were talking about. Once I started thinking about joining a BGLO I knew that this organization was the only one for me. Unfortunately I wasn't as focused as I should have been while at that school and I was an out of state student so tuition was killing me. I had to take a semester off and I switched schools.

Now I am at an HBCU, whereas I was at an PWI before so I have seen both sides. I'm not sure I see as much involvement of my desired organization here as I did there, but I think the difference is that it was more... important for lack of a better word at the PWI. Now I have Drastically improved my GPA, gotten involved in a radio reading service on campus and I also plan to join the student government. This organization is still the only one that is in my heart, as I have studied the history and it speaks to me, and so I pray that when next spring comes I will have finally reached my highest potential and will be able to join the ranks of the best!!

Thanks again sisterfriends for support and inspiration :)

Loved&Inspired 06-10-2008 04:33 PM

I believe that this is a wonderful thread and it will truly help me in my journey into XYZ organization. I attended rush and unfortunately recieved a rejection letter in undergrad. I have graduated with a gpa above a 3.5 and am involved in my community. I know that those things alone are still not enough. So I continue to pray and wait for my time to come, while also improving other aspects of my life.

Gold 06-10-2008 04:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ahh1913 (Post 1627758)
Wonderful topic.....

P.S. Is anyone working with Project ACE in their chapter?

Yes, I am working with Project ACE.

Gold 06-10-2008 05:15 PM

Wow! I love this thread!
 
Wow, I cannot believe that I did not reply to this back in 2001 when I was a wannabe! :)

I joined DST via an alumnae chapter. In undergrad I attended events, volunteered with the chapter and went to rush but I did not submit an application. Although I think a "collegiate" experience would have been great, I would not change an ounce of my journey to DeltaLand.

After graduating college in 1998, Delta was still very much in my heart. I went to grad school and learned as much as I could about the chapter in my area. I continued to support their events and meet people in the chapter.

Fortunately I did not have friends who were getting membership while I was still waiting. I made many friends online via Greek Chat and Deltanet (one of which is my LS...Salience, I miss you!)

I would say, if Delta is truly in your heart, yourwill continue to pursue membership until you have it. I wanted to be a Delta since my senior year of high school it took from 1994 to 2002 for my dream to become reality.

I would also say, be able to truthfully answer why you want to be a Delta. It is important to know the 22 founders and the history of the organization, but it is more important to know why Delta is in your heart. If you reasons are material and/or artificial, then you need to begin soul searching before pursuing membership.

Good Luck!

DSTsFBI 06-10-2008 07:14 PM

I became a member of DST via an undergraduate chapter. It was an experience that I will never forget. I must say that since I crossed into Deltaland just a few short months ago, my life has not been the same.

Like many people, my best friend (well my used to be best friend) and I were going to attend rush together. Unfortunately, my friend did not keep on top of her priorities that semester and her GPA fell a a little bit short of being a 2.5 We were devastated that we would not become Deltas at the same time. I can tell that my friend is greatly hurt by the fact that I am a Delta and she is not. She hardly ever talks to me now. I would like to let all SFs know that if it is meant for you to become a Delta, it will happen; just continue to be you and helping hand to your community.

Jazz.E. 06-11-2008 01:01 AM

Hello Ladies,

I am a new member of the forum, but I’ve been reading the posts and this is one I felt more inclined to comment on. I’m a transfer student attending skool in the fall and I am really interested in joining XYZ org. I’m working on my community service and my grades are up to par. I’ve met and attended functions with ladies of XYZ before they became members, but I may not have made a good impression…I was young minded and there were other things I felt was more important at the time. Well, its 3 years later, and I’ve done a complete 180, and some of the ladies are still in skool. I was wondering if anybody though that could be a bad thing for me, even though it happened a few years back?
Back to the topic at hand
I’ve never been rejected by XYZ (b/c I haven’t applied), but I do know about rejection. One thing I keep in mind is that rejection is like a brick wall—it isn’t there to tear you down or scare you, but it’s there to see how bad you want what’s on the other side. I’m the kind of person who strongly believes “If it’s something I want, I will get it” (not to sound arrogant). Because I am a child of God and I’m in his favor, I am willing to do what it is to get what I want. If you don’t think this way about yourself, who else will?
Another thing that helps me is the Serenity prayer: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. And always remember Proverbs 3:5-6: Trust in the Lord with all your heart…and He will direct your paths.
If it’s meant for you, TRUST and BELIEVE, you’ll get it!!
PEAAACCCEEEE!!!!
JazzE

Velocity_14 06-15-2008 02:08 PM

A. Did you apply for membership during your college years?

Yes, once. I originally attended an HBCU where the chapter was on probation and later suspended. I transferred two years later b/c my department lost accreditation. The chapter at my new school had a line the second semester I was there and I submitted even though I didn't expect to make it due to the fact I had not been there very long. I just wanted to put myself out there because since the 8th grade my interest NEVER waivered. I still did a lot of service with the chapter and the community and focused on my academics. I became really close friends with chapter members who...six years later...were there for me EVERY step of the way...

B. While waiting for the chance to join, what did you do in the meantime?

I knew if and when it was my time, God would have me in place. I kept doing service on my own, focused on my career goals, and went to grad school. While in graduate school working on my master's, I ended up working with a young lady at the university who was a member of the local alumnae chapter and I participated and volunteered in a lot of the chapter's events while doing my service and working hard at school on my own. This connected me with a lot of young women in the chapter I would later be initiated along with my 14 other LS':D.

C. While others around you were becoming members, how did you stay focused on the mission of joining the sisterhood that you felt lead to pursue?

I was very happy for them...and two of my closest elementary school friends that crossed at my undergrad school was always positive and supportive of me as I was to them. When I did cross on 4/28/07...the love I got from them and that chapter (as well as my own) still makes me tear up now...

To ALL BGLO Sorority members, what advice would you give those who were not chosen this year for membership?

When it is your season, EVERYTHING will fall into place. So, just do your part to make sure you are ready (community service/gpa/etc.) because everyone does not get a second opportunity. As CT4 stated, sometimes a denial IS a delay. Don't be discouraged by a no and if a no makes you decide to try to join another organization then it wasn't for you anyway. True character shines in the midst of adversity...so what will you do?

ladygreek 07-03-2008 03:07 PM

^^^ I am sure the Deltas are not asking you to memorize anything.

NinjaPoodle 07-03-2008 04:27 PM

Quote:

Did YOU join your sorority through a collegiate or alumnae chapter?


Graduate

Quote:

For those who joined via the ALUMNAE chapter,
A. Did you apply for membership during your college years?
B. While waiting for the chance to join, what did you do in the meantime?
C. While others around you were becoming members, how did you stay focused on the mission of joining the sisterhood that you felt lead to pursue?




A. No. I wasn’t ready.
B. Got my grades, community service and my attitude together.
C. Since I wasn’t really focused on others, keeping to my goal was wavy gravy :) 11 years from my initial interest period was a long time to wait but I kept busy with school, photography, volunteering, etc.. life in general, so I wasn’t sitting around biting my nails worrying. Staying focused was easy for me because the Sigma Gamma Rho mission was already incorporated in my life.


Quote:

To ALL BGLO Sorority members, what advice would you give those who were not chosen this year for membership?

From my Soror PHDiva:

Quote:

Originally Posted by PhDiva (Post 1410154)
My best advise for SF who wish to become sorors is to
(1) Be discreet and thoughtful about your interactions with members. You can show your interest without being obnoxious about it. I am a SF turned soror and no one here knew of my interest in SGRho. I purposefully kept my interest to myself, to the members of the alumnae chapter I was interested in joining and a few friends - one a Delta who tried to talk me out of pledging SGRho (LOL) and a SGRho who helped me get in contact with the alumnae chapter in my area.
(2) Do your service and make yourself the best applicant possible. If you haven't done much service, get to work. If your interviewing skills are sub par, have a friend help you.
(3) Live your life. I'm a neo and I love SGRho to the fullest but I am also about to be married, have a full time job as a college professor, and have family that I spend time with. Learn how to balance your desire to become a member with the other priorities in your life. Esp. when you pursue membership in a grad chapter, you will find women balancing multiple commitments (work, kids, school, sorority).
(4) Stay positive and know that God doesn't close one door without opening another one. If this year you are rejected from pursuing membership, treat that as a learning experience. Tighten up your application and your communication skills and try again. Our organizations don't want women who give up on the first try.

Best wishes to all,
PhDiva

AND SisterGreek PinkiesUp best sums it up:
Quote:

Rejection means look and see what you need to improve upon and if it's for you or in your heart, try again.

MissJayde 07-21-2008 02:43 AM

I am so excited to find this topic after reading tons of other topics that I thought were going to be helpful that ended up being bash-fests. While I haven't had all the life experiences you guys talk about, I am a member of a youth sorority and can relate to a lot of what you are talking about, though I'm sure on a much smaller scale. I tried to join my sorority 3 times, the first I missed the meeting b/c of bad info, and the second I didn't complete my forms right. And when I saw the girls on that second line with their pins and jackets, I believe a part of my heart broke. Not because I really had the org in my heart then, but because I felt like I had been robbed. In the months between when they crossed and when I crossed, I grew an appreciation, not only for my sorority, but for all GLOs, especially the D9.
I learned so much about true sisterhood and what sororities are truly about. I know God planned for this to happen in my life the way it did because I’m truly a new person now after that experience and crossing. I would have joined because my friends were doing it and because my sisters(I didn’t use the word we normally use because it seems to upset people on this forum :confused:;)) are the “it girls” in our town, but
now I can honesty say that I know the meaning of sisterhood and that my heart and my soul belongs to my org and hopefully, there will be room in the heart of ABC/XYZ (I’m practicing discretion :D)for me, because there is certainly more than enough room in mine for them.
Your stories of perseverance are so inspiring to me. Thank you all and God bless!


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