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-   -   Openly Gay Members (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=94049)

DrPhil 09-02-2009 12:01 PM
Less is more.

SigNuTT459 02-22-2011 04:13 PM
I think the idea of kicking out a brother for being gay is intolerant. We have 3 openly gay brothers in the active chapter, and the are some of the most positive guys for our chapter, all 3 have served on Exec, and have been a great asset for the chapter. This has been stated before, but I just wanted to reiterate it: Don't let this be an issue, don't miss out on guys who could do wonders for your chapter. Accept them with Love, accept the Truth about them, and live side by side with them in Honor.

LTH

MikeEllis 05-10-2011 01:39 PM
Coming out during pledgeship
 
In 1986, there was a fraternity pledge at East Texas State who (and I'm using his own words here) "heard all their crap about brotherhood and thought they meant it." So he came out to his Big Brother. Immediately, the chapter had an "emergency meeting" and booted the pledge out because they were worried about their reputation for having a gay fraternity member.

Meanwhile, there were at least two other member who were gay and probably even a couple. Most everyone knew about them, but they weren't hassled because they didn't openly admit to anything.

Do situations like this still happen today, 25 years later?

naraht 05-11-2011 06:07 AM
Service Fraternity
 
All I can speak to is my service fraternity (Alpha Phi Omega)... Within the last 10 or so years we have had two out of the closet gay men on our board, one at large and the other representing "Region X" for which most of their chapters are in California. No guarantee of course of what would happen at an individual chapter, but if Nationals found out it would *not* be pretty.

AlphaFrog 05-11-2011 08:18 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MikeEllis (Post 2054761)
In 1986, there was a fraternity pledge at East Texas State who (and I'm using his own words here) "heard all their crap about brotherhood and thought they meant it." So he came out to his Big Brother. Immediately, the chapter had an "emergency meeting" and booted the pledge out because they were worried about their reputation for having a gay fraternity member.

Meanwhile, there were at least two other member who were gay and probably even a couple. Most everyone knew about them, but they weren't hassled because they didn't openly admit to anything.

Do situations like this still happen today, 25 years later?
Of course it still happens. It may not be handled as obviously as your situation, but a guy who comes out in a conservative chapter could suddenly find himself in front of standards board for what would normally be minor infractions.

I'm hoping these cases are few and far between, but we're talking about an age group that still sees the "right" social reputation as a top priority. On some campi, getting the "gay" reputation would be social suicide.

I'd like to think one day that it won't matter, but unfortunately, we're not there yet. It's sad that some people can't just live their own lives and take care of their own marriages and not worry who their neighbour is married to.

AXiDLover 05-24-2011 04:04 PM
A lot of this is crazy to me. A lot of the fraternities on our campus (in the Northeast area) have openly gay members. The fraternity's which house these members don't get a negative or gay connotation and the guys get a lot with their brothers great!

I couldn't even imagine having problems with gay brothers (or lesbian sisters)

naraht 05-24-2011 08:16 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by AXiDLover (Post 2058199)
A lot of this is crazy to me. A lot of the fraternities on our campus (in the Northeast area) have openly gay members. The fraternity's which house these members don't get a negative or gay connotation and the guys get a lot with their brothers great!

I couldn't even imagine having problems with gay brothers (or lesbian sisters)
It *really* varies from campus to campus. Here is a formula that I just came up with off the top of my head. :)

Take the number of times that your state voted for the Democratic Candidate for president in the last 5 elections. Add 2 if Gay Marriage is legal in your state. Add 3 if there is an active Gay and Lesbian group on campus. Subtract 3 if a ban on Gay Marriage has been written into the State Constitution. Subtract 5 if the University President really has to be of the same Religion as the group that started the school. Subtract 5 if the school requires you to attend chapel every week.

I think that gives a 10 for UMass-Amherst or George Washington University and a -13 for Oral Roberts University(Oklahoma) or Hyles Anderson. Of course at *both* ends of the scale you end up with some schools that ban Fraternities and Sororities... (And at Oral Roberts and Hyles Anderson you don't have to worry about what your fellow students will do if you are out of the closet, you won't be a student there anymore)

Alumiyum 05-24-2011 10:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by AXiDLover (Post 2058199)
A lot of this is crazy to me. A lot of the fraternities on our campus (in the Northeast area) have openly gay members. The fraternity's which house these members don't get a negative or gay connotation and the guys get a lot with their brothers great!

I couldn't even imagine having problems with gay brothers (or lesbian sisters)
I wish it wasn't that way, but it is on many campuses. Personally I wish a person's sex life could just stay private...it's no one's business unless they want it to be anyway.

Quote:
Originally Posted by naraht (Post 2058261)
It *really* varies from campus to campus. Here is a formula that I just came up with off the top of my head. :)

Take the number of times that your state voted for the Democratic Candidate for president in the last 5 elections. Add 2 if Gay Marriage is legal in your state. Add 3 if there is an active Gay and Lesbian group on campus. Subtract 3 if a ban on Gay Marriage has been written into the State Constitution. Subtract 5 if the University President really has to be of the same Religion as the group that started the school. Subtract 5 if the school requires you to attend chapel every week.

I think that gives a 10 for UMass-Amherst or George Washington University and a -13 for Oral Roberts University(Oklahoma) or Hyles Anderson. Of course at *both* ends of the scale you end up with some schools that ban Fraternities and Sororities... (And at Oral Roberts and Hyles Anderson you don't have to worry about what your fellow students will do if you are out of the closet, you won't be a student there anymore)
I think we get a 3. Though I'm not honestly sure if there is a ban on gay marriage in the state constitution...but it wouldn't surprise me in the least if there was.

# of times state voted for Democratic candidate: 0
Gay marriage is not legal in this state: 0
Active gay/lesbian group on campus: +3
Gay marriage ban in state constitution: 0?
University president of same religion: N/A
Chapel: N/A
(public school)

PiKA2001 05-25-2011 12:24 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by naraht (Post 2058261)
It *really* varies from campus to campus. Here is a formula that I just came up with off the top of my head. :)

Take the number of times that your state voted for the Democratic Candidate for president in the last 5 elections. Add 2 if Gay Marriage is legal in your state. Add 3 if there is an active Gay and Lesbian group on campus. Subtract 3 if a ban on Gay Marriage has been written into the State Constitution. Subtract 5 if the University President really has to be of the same Religion as the group that started the school. Subtract 5 if the school requires you to attend chapel every week.
If only it was that easy.
Also-
Why is the presidential candidate weighed instead of the Gubernatorial candidate for that state?

naraht 05-25-2011 05:26 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alumiyum (Post 2058292)
I wish it wasn't that way, but it is on many campuses. Personally I wish a person's sex life could just stay private...it's no one's business unless they want it to be anyway.



I think we get a 3. Though I'm not honestly sure if there is a ban on gay marriage in the state constitution...but it wouldn't surprise me in the least if there was.

# of times state voted for Democratic candidate: 0
Gay marriage is not legal in this state: 0
Active gay/lesbian group on campus: +3
Gay marriage ban in state constitution: 0?
University president of same religion: N/A
Chapel: N/A
(public school)
Which State and University? I can probably figure it out. :)

naraht 05-25-2011 06:35 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by PiKA2001 (Post 2058321)
If only it was that easy.
Also-
Why is the presidential candidate weighed instead of the Gubernatorial candidate for that state?
Party of Governor really isn't that useful. Both Massachusetts and Oklahoma have elected Democrats in two of their last five Gubernatorial elections.

DeltaBetaBaby 05-25-2011 09:30 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by naraht (Post 2058261)
It *really* varies from campus to campus. Here is a formula that I just came up with off the top of my head. :)

Take the number of times that your state voted for the Democratic Candidate for president in the last 5 elections. Add 2 if Gay Marriage is legal in your state. Add 3 if there is an active Gay and Lesbian group on campus. Subtract 3 if a ban on Gay Marriage has been written into the State Constitution. Subtract 5 if the University President really has to be of the same Religion as the group that started the school. Subtract 5 if the school requires you to attend chapel every week.
I gave my school 5 + 3 = 8 points. This sounds about right. There were probably a few alpha male chapters that wouldn't have been down with it, but the biggest/most prestigious fraternities seemed okay. I think they knew that gay men often attract a lot of women.

(BTW, in just one week, my state gets an extra point when civil unions become legal!)

Alumiyum 05-25-2011 09:45 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by naraht (Post 2058350)
Which State and University? I can probably figure it out. :)
Montevallo in Alabama...being a state school helps it be a little more liberal, but I remember in high school being told it was soooooo liberal only to get there and remember down here, liberal is relative. The Greeks are getting there though, generally speaking.

naraht 05-26-2011 05:28 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby (Post 2058371)
I gave my school 5 + 3 = 8 points. This sounds about right. There were probably a few alpha male chapters that wouldn't have been down with it, but the biggest/most prestigious fraternities seemed okay. I think they knew that gay men often attract a lot of women.

(BTW, in just one week, my state gets an extra point when civil unions become legal!)
Civil Unions aren't in the calculation I gave, but one point for Civil Unions sounds right. Illinois, right?

naraht 05-26-2011 05:29 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alumiyum (Post 2058373)
Montevallo in Alabama...being a state school helps it be a little more liberal, but I remember in high school being told it was soooooo liberal only to get there and remember down here, liberal is relative. The Greeks are getting there though, generally speaking.
Alabama bans it in the State Constitution. So Montevallo is +3 for SPECTRUM and -3 for the State Constitution for zero. Of course Alabama has *everything* in its state constitution (longest in the world!)


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