The credit bureau that'll rat out your effed up credit -- but with a cool name


AIM toothpaste

WTF? I was thinking AOL Instant Messenger!


Sears

Sears- where people shopped before Walmart existed

Coke

Coke - it's pretty useless without Jack or Captain.





Rolodex

A 1980s phenom!


Subway

Not as good as Jimmy John's but cheaper than Quizno's.





Milk.

Milk. For when you'd like to clear a room.



Coach.

Why pay 1000's of dollars when you can get the bootleg for 1/10 the price?


Lysol

When you want to smell farts and "Fresh Laundry"


Post-in Notes

"When you want to express yourself in the most annoying yet non intrusive way....also available in Suicide Blue"




Zune

When you want to store 1000's of songs but not pay for the iName

Botox

15 years younger for only $1,000 per year!


(ok, someone's got to go there)

Condoms

It's not that hard of a choice.



NFL Football

Stealing husbands across America every Sunday afternoon.

hot tubs

Who says sitting in a vat of urine and STDs isn't sexy?


Next: Answering machines