Soooo...guess what! He lavaliered me! He gave me the lavalier a few weeks ago, but I didn't write about it until now because we JUST had the candle pass ceremony. I seriously couldn't stop smiling when I saw the lav.

The ceremony was so nice and everyone "oohed" and "aahed" when our president explained what its purpose was. They oohed and aahed a lot more when I turned off the candle! :-)

Congrats!

Lavaliering and pinning were two of my favorite traditions when I was in school. It was always exciting to walk into the house and see the candle sitting on the table, the announcement there was a candlepass that night. Everyone started speculating on who could it be? It was the talk of the house for the whole day. It can't be Jane, she's only been dating her guy a month. It can't be Susie. She's been dating her boyfriend forever and if he hasn't given her his pin by now, he never will. :D

Then after dinner everyone would gather around and the pass would start. I loved the song we sang. The candle slowly moved around the room. Everybody watched the girls we thought it might be but they passed the candle on to the next. Wow, not her or her! I thought for sure it was one of those. One of the top "contenders" made a move to blow it out. Psyche! Nope not her either. The candle continued around the circle.

One time around and everyone clapped and cheered. A pinning! Wait, could it even be an engagement? (A real rarity when I was in school.) The singing started up again and the anticipation was even stronger. The field of potential candidates had significantly narrowed. All eyes were now on the girls we knew were already lavaliered. (Every once in a blue moon we'd have a shocker with someone who's boyfriend skipped lavaliering and went straight to pinning.)

Finally the candle got blown out and the room erupted with clapping, cheering and hugs. Not long afterwards the sounds of male singing could be heard outside. All the sisters would file outside to be seranaded by the guy's fraternity. They would sing hello and we would sing/answer back. Then the young man in question would be drug out to the front of the pack to sing to his lady love. The girl would shyly be pushed forward as well and the singing continued.

The whole thing was sweet and it's a lovely memory. (Especially if you don't think about everyone heading to the nearest bar afterwards for an impromptu mixer. Though those were always fun too. :D)

Somehow "turning off the candle" just doesn't resonate like "blowing out the candle". Ah well . . .congratulations, LucyKKG!

Congrats on your lavaliering Lucy!!! The other girl who was on here talking about it AEPhiLC also got lavaliered over break!

Im having a similar issue... also i just subscribed today... can anyone tell me how to post a new thread?

This kind of thing makes me wish I was in a Greek system with this tradition. But we're too small (and sororities are unhoused) for it to ever work.

LOVE the idea of a ring for the guy. My bf (in sigma chi) always hints at lavaliering me, and my birthday AND our anniversary are coming up, within a month of each other, and I want to be able to give him something as well :)

Sorry to post again, but up here at my university in Canada, we have one fraternity and three sororities, and have been here less than 20 years. You can always start a tradition ;)

I would hint at it. But be wary of the "curse of the lavaliere". Seriously, it seems like every couple that has been "lavaliered", they haven't lasted. But that's just me. It depends on how you are viewing the lavaliere. It can be seen as a sign of his devotion to you to go steady, or as a pre-engagement. Plus, he would have to look into Theta Chi to see how they handle this.

Good luck!

Can non greeks lavalier?
 

I'm a sister of Alpha Omicron Pi, but my boyfriend is not in a fraternity. I know a bunch of y'all saw the Greek episode where Caseys (non-greek) boyfriend lavalieres her (admit it, we all watch it!) This gave my boyfriend the idea of lavaliering me, but what are the rules behind that? Can he do it? Would i just be lavaliered with my own letters?

Lavaliering is usually reserved for fraternity men, in my experience. Perhaps a pre-engagement/promise ring would be a better option?

There's no reason why a man who isn't in a fraternity can't lavalier his girlfriend. My husband lavaliered me... since he's not in a fraternity, he got me a pretty little heart-shaped pendant. My sorority did a candle pass just the same as if I'd received a fraternity lavalier.

At my school (and across all the sororities there) for boyfriends that were not greek, they would give their girlfriend a pearl- and then the girlfriend would wear the pearl next to her own sorority lavalier. It basically meant the same thing as a lavalier. It wasn't until I joined greek chat that I realized that it wasn't a universal thing!

If you don't think he'd want to do it, then my thought & suggestion for you would be to let it go.

Laveliering is a huge deal - supposedly the step right before engagement.

You wouldn't badger a guy to get engaged to you.. would you badger a guy to lavelier you?

Umm this was quite a while ago, but yeah...I was asking about it because lavaliering wasn't something people at my school had even heard of.

And I know I've mentioned it elsewhere, but I broke up with this guy over a year ago. :rolleyes: