And - new thought - if you see the group dressed alike for recruitment and then pledge, do you expect it to change?

Imagine my situation - second day of recruitment as a PNM, I can't figure out why all the groups are looking at me funny. Then I go into Gamma Phi - they have red dresses with blue polka dots (hey, it was the 80s) and I have THE EXACT SAME DRESS, only blue with red polka dots. Good thing I pledged Gamma Phi!

They change it a little bit every year, like this year the white skirt and black skirt are still ok, but they're going with different shirts with the white skirts and different sweaters with the black skirts.....but last year, we had to get a black skirt because they didn't like the black skirt she already had (too full? too long?) and had to get a black dress because they didn't like the $250 Ann Taylor black dress that she already owned (it had tiny beads on it that you could barely see), so had to buy another black dress. This year there is a different holy grail sundress that we are searching for....it's just frustrating when they won't go into a store and look around to see what is out there before making pronouncements on what everybody has to wear.

SWTXBelle, my daughter almost did that when she was going through recruitment a couple of years ago. We had planned out her outfits for every round, wrote it all down so she could get it all together, etc. She was going to wear a bright green polo shirt and denim miniskirt to philanthropy round, but ended up wearing a cute blouse and capri pants instead. She called and said, "I'm so glad I didn't wear that outfit, when I walked into AB, guess what they were all wearing.....bright polos and denim miniskirts!" Funny thing is...that's the sorority she ended up joining, too.

I think that's just poor planning on the recruitment chair's part. This year we had a powerpoint presentation along with our fashion handbook of real dresses that are currently being carried by real stores. So it was like, "J. Crew and Ann Taylor both have these lavender dresses that would be perfect." She gave at least two examples of each dress so that we had a good idea of what style we were going for. She even gave pictures and stores for shoes, and color swatches for both dresses and shoes!

Your recruitment chair is AWESOME.

That's EXACTLY what I'm talking about--go shopping, look on the internet and see if it's something that you can easily buy instead of making up something that doesn't exist in the retail world.

Can you tell that I'm ticked about this for the 2nd year in a row?!

(emphasis added)

See? See what I meant? :D (Sorry, just had to say it.)

The more I read here, the more I'm sure that my friend's daughter is getting off easy.

Her list is pretty basic compared to the degree of detail that you all are getting into.

Whenever we have girls complaining about wearing the same clothes someone always brings up the point that 'yes, it is wonderful that you have your own personal style, but wouldn't you rather the PNM get to know you for your spunky personality rather than the outfit you decide to wear?' Dressing similarly, oddly enough, actually makes people concentrate less on what you look like and focus more on you.

Plus I agree with what KSUViolet said-- when you need to remember a group, you would do it based on what they wore that day..

I have no problem with dressing alike--it does help you remember which group is which, especially in a large greek system. In fact, I am queen of matchy-matchy and I actually like school uniforms. I think the most striking memory I have from rush back in the day was walking into AOPi house to a sea of red dresses on girls arranged artfully up and down the staircase! 25+ years later, I can see it as clearly in my mind as if it was yesterday. I don't think 99.9% of girls on the other side of rush have a problem with dressing alike, it's just the shopping that is getting to me. I don't have time for it, my daughter really doesn't have time for it, and it's frustrating.

Maybe the key is in how they do it. It seems like at some chapters you get a list kind of late in the game with no consideration for what's actually available, and in other cases, you get more lead time and a better thought through selection.

If I were rush dress assigner, for one of the more formal rounds, I really like the idea that one of my friends used for bridesmaids' dresses: everyone had to use the same fabric, but she could choose a pattern that seemed like her. You'd have the uniformity and the individuality. But even then it'd be tough because you'd have to make sure that half the chapter didn't do the same one.

I agree. The recruitment team and advisors spent alot of time thinking about what would look best on everyone v. what's actually available. We got our clothing list in April. With Refinement Week and dress check in August, we had five months to locate everything, which I think is plently of time.

Most of the items were basics like polos, gauchos, capris, or black cocktail dresses and most girls either had those or easily found them at the mall. In 3 years as an active, I can only remember having a hard time finding one item (an olive colored khaki skirt in 2005-to go with a black tank and flip flops).

The main reason FSU discourages PNM's from wearing long sequined/beaded gowns or just long dresses for pref day is that most of the sorority members will be wearing long formal dresses. There is a need for Panhellenic members to be dressier than the PNM's. On pref day most houses are required to wear floor length white, black, or sorority specific color formal gowns (usually satin or taffeta-like fabrics). Because of the guidelines on the Greeklife website, PNM's usually show up wearing semi-formal or cocktail dresses that are of a less formal material. The differences in dress create a clear division between sorority members and PNM's while still maintaining the atmosphere of the day.