Unless they operate VERY different, it's up to them to decide if they are going to offer you a spot in the house. It's not up to you.

I can hear how excited you are about this chapter. I want to make sure you are properly informed.

As the above poster stated, you have to be offered a bid. You can't just say "I want a bid" and get one. It sounds to me like the recruitment chair is misinformed. This isn't unusual. She may be new to her role or to COB.

I think the best way to resolve this is to just do as she said-- in different words "Suzie, I love XYZ and I'd be honored to take the next step" or something along those lines-- this way she knows your interest and intent.

But from there, it is up to the chapter to offer you the bid. And from there, you either accept or decline.

I say if you feel comfortable at this chapter, go for it.

Taken straight from the recruitment chair's mouth...And I know there's different ways to take this.

"It's not whether we want you, it's if you want us."

Of course I wouldn't approach her and say "I'll take my bid now, thanks!" That's weird. I'm going to continue hanging out with the girls before deciding when to talk to the Recruitment Chair about the bidding and pledging process.

I just find it very hard to believe that something like that would come from a Recruitment Chair, especially one from UF.

I know Recruitment Chairs aren't all perfect, but I'd like to assume that they know what they're doing, and it's very unlikely that they'd say something like that.

...but if you say so.

I'm not attempting to make myself sound good, or make her sound bad. I'm just telling you what happened. I'm obviously not completely versed in the art of sorority life and if I wanted to lie about the situation, I would have made up something much better than that!

I wonder if she's (RC) reading this thread?


ETA: The way the statement is worded, it sounds more like she's saying, "We want you, do you want us?" Not, "You can have us whenever you want."

The recruitment chair?

If not, I'm sure we have tons o UF sorority women perusing the boards!

christi, that sounds very promising!! please realize that usually the entire chapter will vote on a pnm when they feel that they have gotten to know her well enough. one member does not decide who is offered a bid.

during the cob period, bids are USUALLY handed out after several meetings with the pnm. the sorority might offer several pnms bids at the same time, or they might hand them out one at a time, and even on different days. of course, i do not know who chocolate is, and their procedure might be different, but what i described is fairly standard. i don't mean to squelch you enthusiasim, just want you to understand the usual procedure.

good luck and please let us know what happens tonite!!

If that's what she said, then this is a sorority that's DESPERATE for members and one I wouldn't touch with a 10 foot pole.

Hey Christi!

I'm so happy you have found a house that you love and that you seem to fit in well with.

There are no bad sororities at UF, and certainly none that are desperate for members. SEC sororities are far from "desperate".

If I were one of those "UF women perusing the board" (which I take to mean -- one of the women involved with rush in the sorority you love), I would be flattered of the way you speak of its members and organization. I do think, however, that until you get that bid in your hand, it's best to be discreet. I know you're excited, but wait until it's official, and then you can shout it from the rooftops-- and we'll be here cheering for you!

It sounds like you've really clicked with one member, and she seems to be rushing you really hard-- but as FSU Zeta said, there still has to be a vote-- so it's a bit premature to think that you're definately going to get a bid. I would hate for you to get your heart set on it, and then be disappointed.

Things may have changed, but as I recall, spring recruitment had three rounds. After the final round-- that night-- a group of representatives from the sorority would come to your dorm or apartment with flowers and a bid card and ask you if you'd like to pledge. And, as I recall, most of the sororities gave out bids on that same night-- because-- I remember all the banging on the doors and screams of excitement when I lived in the dorms.
It was a special night!

IF a sorority - anywhere, any school - says something like what the poster is reporting they said, they are DESPERATE.

That's such a cute way to offer a bid, so special and personal. :)

I don't think they're considered "rounds" anymore. I know they've just basically made their house open to PNM's (lunch, dinner, movie after dinner, etc) and if you're not able to attend, they said they could schedule something like coffee with a few of the sisters. Regardless, I'm not sure of the time schedule, but I like that this is informal. I get to experience a real sorority dinner and I'm not on a 20 minute time limit. And we can't forget the wonderful lack of pressure!

Anyways, I'm off to my second night of dinner and I'll be sure to ask the RC specifics of the procedures (bids given out randomly or all at once, etc.) since we're all a little in the dark! Plus I'd like to be able to clear it up on the board since I almost feel like I've done something wrong. :confused:

no one knows that,ie-desperate sorority-the recruitment chairperson most likely is new to her position, and might not realize that she should be a little more discreet. i'll bet that she really likes christi, and wants to let her know that.

you have not done anything wrong, christi. have fun tonite, and don't pay us any mind.

I think you also have to understand that this is Spring Recruitment and it's extremely informal. For all they know, I could be using them for a free dinner! The RC asked if I was wanting to pledge now, or if I was just checking out the scene for Fall, and was happy to hear I was too excited to wait (so long as I found the place I was meant to be).

Since they could only gouge my wanting to join on how many times I decide to visit, maybe she said that because I needed to make her aware of if I thought Chocolate was the place I wanted to be. In other words, "We're not going to offer you a bid if you don't take the initiative to show this is where you want to be, and now is when you want to join." Perhaps talking to her and saying "I feel like this is where I want to be" is the only way of letting the girls know I'm serious so they can get serious about talking about me and discussing whether to give me a bid or not. Otherwise, I'm just a waste of their time.

Actually, knowing what I know now, I hereby retract my comment. :p