Geez, y'all moms have me anxious, and I won't have my little legacy until November!

oldrusheewoman, the others have told you the more technical side of legacies...I'll tell you at my chapter, NOT a huge school, we were excited to see any type of ties with our GLO. While most groups have their 'technicalities', I personally believe any sort of connection is really cool!

The following chapters are at Iowa State:
Alpha Chi Omega
Alpha Delta Pi
Alpha Gamma Delta
Alpha Omicron Pi
Alpha Sigma Kappa (Engineering/Science sorority--unhoused)
Chi Omega
Delta Delta Delta
Delta Zeta
Gamma Phi Beta
Kappa Alpha Theta
Kappa Delta
Kappa Kappa Gamma
Phi Beta Chi (Lutheran sorority--unhoused)
Pi Beta Phi
Sigma Kappa

Depending on Chi Omega's legacy policy, she may very well be considered a legacy, but at this point, it's really too late. Legacies are important at Iowa State, but personal interaction with chapter members is just as important, if not moreso.

You also mentioned that your sister (and you or did I miss understand that) were Alpha Xi's. Our legacy policy includes nieces. So, even though their is no chapter their, your daughter would be an AZD legacy through her Aunt.

Both my sister and I were AxiD's-- the neatest thing was my sister came from Iowa to Iowa State for my activation ceremony-- really special!!!

I don't know how AxiD's Rec Sheet looks, but we ask for ALL sorority ties, not just our own. I've filled them out, mentioning a mother, sisters, and cousins in a total of 9 different sororities!! We can list (I forget the exact terminology, which may be just as well) people who are important to the PNM who are greek, also.

My thought is that, knowing that there are Greeks in the family makes a PNM more likely to "stick it out" throughout recruitment and school.

Obviously I messed up-- but hope other moms and other ladies considering recruitment have gained some good advice about legacies-- thanks--

Also to gogoaphi, I really believe that just talking with your step-daughter, reminding her to be herself, and using good resources (like this forum) will help her (and you) be prepared!! I had looked up some websites, but unfortunately didn't find this one until after I sent my daughter off--

oldrusheenowmom (neat name by the way): my fingers are crossed so hard for your daughter, that I'm losing circulation! I'm impressed that she's hanging in there - it would be so easy to bow out. Keep telling her how proud you are of her. I saved all the e-mails and IM's from that time (actually from the whole year -I'm making a "secret" scrapbook that I'm going to try and do for all four years) to show my daughter at some later point.

Not all girls sail through rush and sometimes the hard knocks are the ones that make a person stronger. I kept telling my daughter that everything happens for a reason and that obviously god has some different plan for her. I hope that my words come true especially when she rushes again in February (they have 2nd semester rush) when it will be my turn to toss and turn and worry and fret and I'll be asking for everyone's good thoughts then.

In the meantime, I truly hope that however this turns out (and I hope it's a place in a house) that your daughter is happy and accepting of the outcome.

And you didn't mess up!!! You did the best you could and tried to help as best as you could. There was no way you could have known this would happen. I know I didn't - I was as in shock as my daughter. I also questioned myself - did I give bad advice about what to wear? about how to present herself? I constantly urged her to not overlook any group because it was all about a good fit. But did I forget to tell her to let her know how much she liked a sorority? Over and over the questions went around in my head. In the end, I really think it came down to what several posters above said: she didn't really know a lot of the girls in the houses before hand and I think she got lost in the shuffle that way.

She knows so many more now and hopefully that will help when it's time to rush.

But don't beat yourself up - you sound like you're handling it great.

Also, please remind your daughter that there are snap bids (these are chapters that don't make quota through matching, but the PNM will be called and offered a bid immediately afterwards - no one knows if she's a snap bid other than she!), and then also COB.

Recruitment does NOT stop on Bid Day!!

My sister (who is also a Kappa from Iowa State) is four years older than me and surprised me at my initiation. It's one of my favorite Kappa memories. :)

Each GLO has its own definition of legacy...

According to the Chi Omega national web site only daughters and sisters of initiated members are considered by Chi Omega as legacies.

On the other hand, Alpha Xi Delta's legacy policy was recently amended to include nieces, as well as daughters, sisters, and granddaughters.

Here's hoping that it all works out for your daughter.

BTW ... drop over to the Alpha Xi Delta forum and introduce yourself ... its always good to have another sister on the board!!

Chi Omega considers mothers and sisters as direct legacies only. And as stated before, many GLO's vary on the extent they go down the leg line. Pi Beta Phi was considering, I'm not sure of the outcome, of adding step-moms, etc. to their legacies. We must remember that what NPC recruitment was "like" 30, 10 or even 5 years ago, it's not the same NPC recruitment today. And it continues to change yearly. So, how do you keep up? You make that call. Pick up the phone and dial your national GLO and ask to speak with someone who can answer your question(s). That way YOU are up-to-date and you won't be second guessing yourself. This is not directed at oldrusheewoman, but all of us. That's the one thing I hear "after" the fact--"but they didn't do it that way when I went thru."
oldrusheewoman what everyone here has said, we have our fingers and toes crossed for you and your daughter.

and please know that being a legacy does not guarantee a bid to the legacy sorority.

As FSU Zeta said, the one thing I knew was a legacy doesn't guarantee-- I am soooo proud of my daughter-- She said she had a great time at her one party last night and spent the time of the other parties outside the houses with the Rho Gams-- They have been sooo sweet and nice to her-- she said some -- not just her's- stopped by her dorm room last night just to visit-- As a mom is it appropriate once "they unveil" to send them a note thanking them for being so kind-- I told my daughter whatever happens, happens-- keeping my fingers crossed that she gets an invite tonight--

Thank you notes NEVER go out of style! I think it would be very much appreciated, and definitely show everyone that your daughter has class!