Um, I got wasted off three drinks last night due to Jules' self-inflicted rehab for the past month.

I have this GIGANTIC purple/green bruise on my forehead, and no idea how it got there :( I also don't know how I got home, but I'm more worried about the bruise.

My husband was tailgating and got completely wasted...when they were playing catch with a football he slipped on some wet grass on a golf course and broke his wrist.

I'm glad I'm not the only one, I did this last summer and I'm still getting crap about it. Even last night, I was in the bathroom (at the same bar) and some random girl was saying, "I lost my phone," and one of my friends blurts out, "Don't feel bad, she dropped hers in a toilet here once."

I'm so clumsy when I'm sober that adding alcohol to the situation pretty much seals the deal for random bruises and accidents. Last New Year's, I was leaving the party we were at and there wasn't any snow, so how I twisted my ankle and got grass stains on my khakis. Didn't even hurt until the next day when I woke up.

Another night I was wearing shoes that had no traction, walking down some wet steps, when my phone rang. Apparently my answering it caused me to loose my balance because as I said hello to my friend I fell and had two large bruises on my leg and rear end for about a month.

Hmmm, a week and 2 days after my drunken injury...and my foot is STILL swollen and hurts like a mother. I'm going to the doctor today.

I've been noticing more and more brusies on my legs which can either come from druken injuries or knocking into kid sized furniture at work. Either way the huge yellow/brown/purple marks on my legs are NOT cool!
I fall down so easily sober, like the time I fell off the curb at the dorm circle, it's no wonder I get drunken injuries like no tomorrow

Oh, I have had a few drunken injuries!
The worst was about 2 years ago when I was way drunk at Hole in the Wall(CHEESY Atlanta bar) and was climbing up to dance with a friend on one of the little level things and somehow managed to slice the HELL out of my toe. Blood is everywhere and the carry me to the bathroom, have me up on the sink counter with my foot in the sink and me not feeling ANYTHING. I woke up the next morning with all of this toilet paper wrapped around my toe, secured by duct tape. I seriously should have gotten stitches and I still have a scar.
Then, a few weeks ago, I was leaving the Braves game and trying to find a cab with some friends and these guys a little bit down the road yell that they will share a cab with us, so my drunk ass goes hauling towards that cab and in the process, does a HEADER over a potted plant. Luckily, I landed on my tummy and not my head but everyone was DYING! The guys did end up paying for our cab, though, because they said I was some great entertaiment. I had skinned palms and bruised knee's for at least a week!

Just sprained my foot yesterday when I was drunk... I've never heard of anyone spraining their foot before. I do know its tremendously swollen and I can barely walk. Oops.

So I was at a function where I'd had about 10 drinks too many, went mattress sledding, bumped into about 30 tables, you know, standard classy GP behavior...no bruises.

Fast forward to this year where I'm at another function and I'd only had 4-5 drinks too many, my date talked me out of mattress sledding, I didn't crash into anything - I had a HUGE bruise on my thigh for a few weeks and nobody has any idea how it got there.

mattress sledding????

Well, two of my sisters and I were walking down the four flights of stairs from our dorm rooms to leave the building before a function. Stairs + drunk girls always leads to injuries, the funny part is each of us fell at seperate times and made sure to laugh at each other each time. Then the next morning we had initation and we only had to walk across a small parking lot and down some stairs to get where we need to be, and all three of us being sober and sore from falling the night before fell down the stairs again only the stairs were outside this time!!

I HAVE AN IDEA! ;)

I got some good drunk bruises on me this weekend though.

My ex jumped a fence last night when he was drunk and really messed up his ankle. He called me at 12:30 AM saying he broke it, but I don't think it was quite that bad.

(For anyone who's following, I swear I'm done bumping ancient threads now.)

Well, my bf seems to have jumping things while drunk in common with your ex! He runs up to parking meters and grabs on the top, and pushes off them as he jumps over.

There's also these random cement posts near busy intersections on campus. They're about 3 feet high, and he likes to just run up to them and see if he can land on the top in a single hop. He's usually pretty good at it, but the other night, he tried it while wearing flip flops. Not a good idea. His feet didn't clear the very top and he fell right on top of the post. I thought he landed on his stomach, but I guess his legs kind of slowed him down before he could land on his stomach. He now has two huge scrapes on the inside of both thighs.

The best part was he was trying this at about 1:30am, close to when the bars were closing, so there were a LOT of people out. Of course, this happened at one of the busiest intersections, so about 100 people stopped and went "OHH!!!!" and then pointed and laughed.