Of course we connected with the women amongst the flowers and pageantry. I don't think the meaning of "why" we were there was ever lost. I met many women (who did not pledge my sorority) who ended up being close friends or best friends during recruitment. For me it's about the people. People like people. I can find a connection though with just about anyone. But honestly, I think the decorations just added more work for everyone involved with recruitment back in the day. Were the decorations over the top and amazing??? Of course! Were the skits fabulous, funny, and interesting???? Of course! But in the long run it was more work for collegians, alumnae, and parents. But I can honestly say, I felt the sisterhood and love of my chapter amongst the overabundance of red roses and other decorations.

This is coming from a Northerner. I know sorority recruitment and such is another dimension down south.

I have heard nowadays that at some schools parents are only allowed to watch the run home and can't go directly to the houses. I could be wrong though.

The other thing is why would you be sad if someone didn't go your legacy house/a friends went to ABC but you got DEF? If my kid got a bid anywhere and she kept a cool head during recruitment I'd be mega proud of her!

I find the whole-family-at-bid-day thing weird, too. I wouldn't want to babysit an entourage while a. still getting to know my new org and b. still processing feelings about my bid, even if I'm happy with my result.

Bid day was for us to celebrate and bond with our new chapter. Presents, OTOH, was a special luncheon for our parents (or whomever we wanted to invite as our "family") to celebrate our new member status and get to know other AOIIs and their fams. We'd know our pledge class by then and have our big sisters assigned, so we'd actually be able to give context when introducing our families to people. "This is my big sis Lisa, we like to watch the news together and clown the talking heads" is better than "This is Susan, she rushed me three days ago... I think." ;)

I didn't experience family at bid day for myself, but I did at Alabama with my daughters when they pledged DDD. Squeal Day at Alabama was really a party and my daughter did not babysit me at all. I hung around taking photos and visiting with parental friends from town (and friends from all over) and my sister-in-law, whose daughter pledged ZTA.

I will absolutely say that when I went through, I can't remember one conversation I had but I remember the skits, the songs, food, decorations and the pretty girls that I was dazzled by. I would like to believe that the no-frills rush definitely creates more ACTUAL connections than the "let's put our prettiest, funniest girls on stage and sell our sisterhood" that I feel it was back then. I'm not a shallow person--it as just more about pageantry and food and music than it was about talking and getting to know people.

Not going to lie—with the way that chapters recycled skits, I always had a tiny part of my heart that hoped the little legacy would one day play one of the roles I did in college and I could go and see her on preview night. Heck, I had dreams of taking a little curly haired Shirley Temple look-alike to preview night and telling her stories about when her own curley haired momma went to see the “pretty Theta girls.” Alas, that dream will never come true.

On another note, it was nice to see how stress free recruitment was for the little legacy this year now that she’s on “the other side.” Within a few hours or recruitment ending each day, she was free. There was not any practices that extended into the wee hours of the morning. Their door stacks were “on point” and they didn’t have to worry about anything else. That was quite a change from the days of full frills. Low stress daughter probably does trump momma’s over-active dream life so I guess I must throw some love to “no-frills.”

Now, if they take away the annual Easter Egg hunt, then we will have some serious problems...

I can see that but I found the days of frills to be another way my sisters and I bonded...laughing as we practiced running out on the yard and singing our welcome song, working on skits, working on rotations, etc. - work week was so much fun. I think what's lost now, especially among larger chapters (over 260 or 300) is the opportunity to work alongside a sister that you may not know that well due to the chapter size. Arizona wasn't as full frills as the SEC schools I knew of, so I can see how a place like Ole Miss (homemade name tags, matching outfits, etc. that my cousins had) did put a lot of work on alums, but at my school, I don't think it did. I truly believe we bonded at another level because of being engaged in such activities...likewise I believe having to wait a semester for initiation (we initiated in March after pledging in late August) made me appreciate the opportunity to be member of my sorority in another way that I think can get lost today. For sure I knew my sorority history well, my sisters (even though my chapter was large) and I had to 'earn' it. I think earning things is sometimes lost today in many areas of life.

NCYMS,

Workweek is still very alive and active. It was little legacy’s favorite thing. They spent tons of time practicing songs, chants, door stacks and convos. They even swapped with another Group on the row and they got to mock rush those girls. “Inspiration week” was filled with arrive projects, inspirational speakers and LOTS of bonding activities—as well as getting to know tons of girls as they went through their bump groups and practiced convos. It really was stress-free and fun. It seems like the best things have been kept in and expanded.