* two word guys hate DON'T and STOP , unless you put them together.
* hello. you have the right to remain silent and not type. Anything typed or said will be recorded, copy+pasted and will be used by us
* A man is a leader, a leader is a ruler, and a ruler is 12 inches long. STILL think youre a man???
* I'm not here right now, if you'd like to reach me on my cell phone, buy me a cell phone!
* Sorry %n, I’m working right now... but next time I decide to procrastinate, Ill get back to you.
* WHat's the difference between ET and a college student? ET phoned home.

let's see...these are some examples off one's up on my list right now.. i'll post some of my own later

*This sexy siren is sleeping.

*some people aim to get a 4.0, others aim for a 3.0, most just aim to come back to college next semester, I on the other hand aim to sell my books back for enough cash to get me alcohol for my week off of school!! :-D

*i eat white people

*If your name was sleep, I'd be doing you in my bed all night long, until the early morning's light

*So I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that's on the worst day of my life.

*You're getting sleepy...sleepy...or at least I am...Leave me alone and let me sleep...

*[remind me to add something clever to this away message]



ill add some of my own in a little bit, if i can remember what name i put them under

that was quick
 

i found them already


*trying to navigate the waves of the monsoon of drama and trama that has hit our side of campus. ugh.

*ahhh, school sucks, lets all gang together and beat it up .... who's with me?!?!

*baby, i may not be dairy queen, but ill treat you right : )

*see theres this HILARIOUS thing about school..its called HOMEWORK..well i guess its not hilarious, i guess it just SUCKS.. so...unless you have someting pertinant to add to my day, DONT MESSAGE ME! :-D

*if u know me, then u know where i am. so leave me a message since you know when ill probably be back

*well im outtie, two fingaz like a playa y'all

*smoking is bad for you. thats why thats what im not doing right now. yesh.

*playing snood, how addictive is this? i highly recommend that you go download it

*I didnt know running into the wall would hurt as much as it did. But here I am, laying in a pile of my own blood in a coma, hoping that my faithful penguin sends for help. Last time this happened the penguin just called me a pussy, took my shoes, and went to see "The Mask." To this day I still dont know if he liked it, and whenever I ask he just calls me a slut and throws ice cubes at me.

*welcome to my room...thats where you are right now :-) anyhow, im probably buried in one of the many piles im supposed to be cleaning, so leave one and hopefully ill be able to find my way to the computer
*And the waitress is practicing politics
As the businessmen slowly get stoned
Yes, they're sharing a drink they call loneliness
But it's better than drinkin' alone

*Point your lashes down
and you can picture my face-
I'm smiling...

Open your mouth, speak your heart
and you can see my soul--
I'm waiting...

Place your amrs around me
and you can embrace my
uncertainty--
I'm shaking...

Press your lips against mine
and try to catch me --
I'm falling....




woo...and I'm spent

Please tell me all the misspellings in this are part of the joke...

Mine are normally links, like:

this (You'll most likely hate me if you go to it...but I laughed my ass off when I went)

or a quote:

*"If someone loves a flower, of which just one single blossom grows in all the millions and millions of stars, it is enough to make him happy just to look at the stars. He can say to himself, 'Somewhere, my flower is there.'"-The Little Prince

*"Silly customer, you cannot hurt a twinkie!"-Apu from The Simpsons

*"I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol."-Stephen Wright

I used to have a bunch but then they got deleted somehow. Makes me sad:(

skjackee....that was HORRIBLE!!!! Haha it was amusing at first but what a mess!!!!!! I HAVE to put that as an away message just so everyone can go through that! Great link...kinda. :D

skjackee,

how do you turn it off???? i need to know, before I subject my friends.... That was hilarious though.

Meredith

skjackee, that was awesome!!! I have to put that up as an away message! But yeah, fill us in on how to turn it off...that might come in handy :D

BAN

please, for everyone's sake, post how to stop it.
It is finals week, and if someone's working on something and their computer crashes, they're going to be PISSED!
It was funny though, if i could stop it.

Here's one my son (who is away at college) left last week:

"Malaria, that must suck!"

Huh?

ctl+alt+del
then end that program

I think that's the only way to get it to stop without shutting down your computer.

"Every time you masturbate, an angel gets its wings"
on a friends away message

"dis tyrone, i aint home...*beep*"
on my away message, taken from a comedy stand-up on ComicView about how short outgoing phone messages can be at times.

"sergeant pepper's lonely hearts club band"
when im feeling melancholy