I agree that this is the most important. Although I think many PNMs think they want to be a part of that chapter, even if they'd never really fit in there.

Is it all about looks?
 

No, usually, it's about the whole package. A good personal presentation, plus a good record on paper -- grades, activities, community service, etc.

I am taking recruitment out of the equation for a moment and speaking to the bigger issue (no pun intended):

If you are bigger than you want to be, even if you have health problems, and if you desire to work on your body, there is always something you can do to work your shape and your health.

- Add more movement to your daily routine.
- Add in 20 minutes of exercise, several days per week. Walking is a fine exercise, as long as you're challenging yourself with elevation, pace, etc.
- Drink more water
- Count calories. We often overestimate what we eat by up to a third! Just the simple act of counting makes you aware of what you are eating.
- Toning what you have can make you appear slimmer. Muscles are denser than fat.

If you so desire, you can lose 17-34 pounds SAFELY by the third week of August (not sure when recruitment is). That's 1-2 pounds per week.

I'm not saying you have to - you may be perfectly happy at your current weight - but it does seem to bother you.

If nothing else, you'll have given yourself a better state of health, perhaps built more confidence, and have accomplished a great goal.

Thank you, thank you, for stating this often-denied truth.
________

My recruitment experiences all come from the University of Mississippi, and I will tell you, some girls will judge you based on your weight. But most will not. Looks do matter, somewhat, but they aren't the most important thing to most chapters. What's more important is your GPA, extra curriculars, recs, and most importantly, your attitude.

Be outgoing and respectful. Meet girls from different chapters. If you're really that worried about it, try to lose some weight. But in the end do you really want to be in a chapter that cut you because of how much you weigh anyway?

Rainbows and lollipops. You can have all of those things and more but if you're obese or unattractive you're not getting a bid from my chapter. There are many chapters where this matters as well as many where it doesn't. There. I said it. Deal.

I say this with a big glass of water sitting next to me, after having just journaled my lunch (meaning I'm not denying what you are saying is 100% da troof):
Don't give overweight people advice on how to lose weight. It does little more than waste your time and frustrate them. Overweight people mentally know how to lose weight (or can Google 77543345 websites on the subject, most of which will start with all of the info in your post) - the issue is being in the right place in your life to do it. You have to decide that it's the right time for you, and you have to WANT it bad enough for yourself-not for a friend, boyfriend, or sorority. Then is the only time it will happen.

Not nice. But true.

I just want to say that it goes both ways. I came from a "weak recruiting chapter", and you know what? PNM's didn't want to come back to my chapter because we had fat women. I don't understand this, myself, having chosen my chapter, but it seems that some people think fat women don't make good friends or that cuter girls are automatically nicer people.

I imagine the people who would reject a chapter based on image are probably more interested in image than they are in friendships with nice people.

For this is the holy trifecta of sorority life.

You want your ball back now or later?

Thanks for taking the post out my fingertips.

OP doesnt allude that she's unhappy about her size, though it's totally possible. If she were to lose this 30someodd lbs you suggested, according to you, she'd only be doing it for rush. I mean, you could fight superficial with superficial, but really, your advice is really unwarranted.

That really only applies if you go through rush at a school which uses recs and resumes heavily and has to cut lots of people, fast. Not all do.

OP - you're overweight. Okeefenokee. Have the best wardrobe you can, killer shoes, and make sure your hair and makeup is perfection. Go into rush with a positive attitude - about ALL the sororities and about yourself.

But DO NOT say things like:

It's kind of like a dude walking up to you that you have no interest in and saying "I don't care what you say, we WILL be together." This decision isn't up to you. It's up to the women who are already members. Getting into a sorority is not like getting a 4.0.

Quoted for truth. Also, I think this is one of the frankest discussions I've seen about weight and recruitment so far.

You are only talking chapter level. What happens when it hits on an organization level?

It is an ugly "It works both ways" situation. That's why at the end of the day you have to know you and how you will fit in.

Believe me when you get to the other side, those "stereotypes" get old quick and you will find yourself hating your own chapter/organization.