GreekChat.com Forums - Resigning/Disaffiliating... Help!!

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- - Resigning/Disaffiliating... Help!! (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=112110)

Quote:

Originally Posted by gagirl90 (Post 1906344)

No I see where you are coming from, and my motto for recruitment is to strive to find girls that make me want to be a better version of myself (oh and hunting for a little! lol)
But when I say obsessed with being top tier, I overheard so many girls talking sh*t about other girls based on looks/popularity/etc. There were many comments on ranking cards (I don't think this recruitment info is too top secret lol) about looks and who hangs out where. Littereally, one girl came up to me before a round and said "OMG the girl you have hangs with guys in XYZ frat. Make her want us" (Naturally we did not get along and she pledged the right glo for her instead of me trying to lie about reasons she should join us) And as for the overachieving thing, no one pushes us to improve ourselves- it's all about the friggin image!
That is what I can't stand, that people care more about reputation than sisterhood. And I go to a cutthroat SEC school with the rich and gorgeous- "top tier" is about the frats you mix with and the labels on your clothes
However yes I do admire the prominent student org leaders and community service leaders in our house. I just wish that could be the focus instead of this cookie cutter "good involved girl" image. Just because I don't walk around with my resume on my shirt doesn't mean I'm not an asset, and just because I stand up for myself doesn't mean I should be treated like I'm not wanted.
Should I go to nationals about this or something??

By all means. That will certainly make things so much better for you with your sisters.

Look, you're miserable. You don't fit in with the culture of this chapter. Things aren't going to get better from your perspective. You're in school for an education, the social experience provided by a sorority is secondary. I think you already know what you need to do. So just quit already, move on and stop thrashing your sisters in public like this, because it's only going to make things much worse for you in the long run.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ggirl617 (Post 1906435)

another downside is still paying...

Yeah, exactly.

If she was at my alma mater and felt the same way, I'd say "just go to the required things - don't wear your letters - hang out with your non Greek friends a lot and join lots of other groups - stick it out and then you can be active as an alumna."

But the fact is anyone who's an active at an SEC school is putting a SUPER BIG CHUNK O' CHANGE into that sorority membership and not using it to its fullest is kind of nuts, especially in these economic times. You should probably either be the whole way in or be the whole way out, unless your last name is Trump and you can spare the $$.

I was more thinking she just do the mandatory/required things while she was trying to decide what to do. Definitely this is not the answer for the long haul...maybe just for the rest of the semester.

Transfer schools to one that doesn't have your sorority. You'll be an alum. Otherwise, I don't know what to tell you. You want to be in the national sorority and be affiliated for the rest of your life, but you also don't want to be affiliated with your chapter. Well, you are stuck between a rock and, well, you get the idea.

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnotherKD (Post 1906835)

I hope you're being flip and funny and not serious in the least.

Definitely an issue to talk with someone you trust in the fraternity. Before I resigned, I spent hours talking to the president, whom I trusted and respected very much. The final result was that he told me to do what I felt was right, which ended up being resigning and joining another fraternity. People over the Internet do not know your circumstances/feelings. It's a lot better to talk to someone in real life.

Being from a small college and small oncampus sorority, the only thing I can suggest is that you talk to your campus advisor about how you feel. Put it in terms of your feelings without blame. Maybe she/he can get to the bottom of it all. Good Luck!

Quote:

Originally Posted by TitaniumGene (Post 1906989)

Definitely an issue to talk with someone you trust in the fraternity.

Except, of course, she's in a sorority.

Quote:

Before I resigned, I spent hours talking to the president, whom I trusted and respected very much. The final result was that he told me to do what I felt was right, which ended up being resigning and joining another fraternity.

Which is not an option in an NPC sorority. Ever.

Quote:

Originally Posted by MysticCat (Post 1907146)

Except, of course, she's in a sorority.

Some of us are technically in fraternities.

{/nitpick} :p

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 1906920)

I hope you're being flip and funny and not serious in the least.

Should have put in the :rolleyes: ... sarcasm is so hard to show over the internet...

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnotherKD (Post 1907343)

Should have put in the :rolleyes: ... sarcasm is so hard to show over the internet...

Too bad there isn't a sarcasm font. "Wait, what is she saying? Ooh wait, she has the sarcasm font on, now I get it". OF course, even with the sarcasm font on, that still doesn't guarantee that i would get it... :rolleyes:

Quote:

Originally Posted by CougarGrad (Post 1907179)

Some of us are technically in fraternities.

{/nitpick} :p

I know, I know. :p

I actually almost said "a sorority (or a fraternity for women)," but I was trying to keep it simple.