The life of an alumna is completely different to that of a collegian. I have a hard time believing you didn't have time as an undergraduate and now as a graduate student (who I hope has a life outside of school) you have time. Sorority membership for many was a sacrifice during the undergraduate years, and there are a bevy of women (and men) on this site who made it work time wise. I can think of women and men on my campus who worked and went to school, and since they wanted it bad enough made it work. Some of my sisters took five years for school, and managed their membership, an even in professional and graduate school show up for alumnae appropriate events.

There are plenty of other groups to get involved in, why an NPC sorority after graduation? To be blunt, the fact that you didn't try or make time as a student is a huge red flag to me, and for me, works against you.

If you read threads on here about Alumnae Initiation, you should understand.

I'll be blunt. A lot of GCers are taken aback, and I might even say offended, by PNAMs who "sorority shop". Many of us feel that sorority membership is a privilege, not a right. The general reason for people not liking sorority shopping is that many of us (myself included), feel that an AI should have a personal connection to the sorority that they're seeking membership in. As opposed to looking to see what groups do AI and going from there.

The main membership source for NPC sororities is collegiate recruitment. That's the lifeblood. Many of us feel that AI should be used to honor people who have made a special commitment/relationship to the sorority.

I could probably go on for awhile, but if you read threads on here (look for ones from several years ago when it really got hotly debated) you'll get the idea.

I'll also ditto that becoming an AI is MUCH MUCH MUCH different that being in the group as a collegian. You are not a member of the collegiate chapter. You are not invited to their events (except for alumnae focused events). You do not do the things that the chapter does. At all. Again, your membership will have little to nothing to do with the collegiates.

You're also likely to run into these feelings from people in real life as well, so if you're going to go about this the way that you seem to want to, you should be prepared for that.

An excellent explanation KSUViolet, as usual.

Think of AI as a precious gift given out of love, respect and gratitude. Expecting someone to give you a gift because you deserve it is presumptuous. Asking someone to give you a gift is rude. Doing things solely in hopes of receiving a gift is selfish.

I don't really understand how some people say their course load was SOOOO heavy there's NO way they could have joined. Right, because those of us who were capable of joining just took slacker courses at slacker schools...it's not like we learned time management skills or anything. I understand that there are other legitimate obstacles but course load? Really?

ETA: I should have read ahead. I agree with the other posts, especially VandalSquirrel's points about time management.

I have to chime in here too, just because, I think it is valid to underscore that that there are serious students in collegiate chapters who still find the time to devote to their sororities. My daughters are pre-med as well as some of their sisters. They go to class and study an additional 8-10 hours a day. They also volunteer several times a week which of course takes time. They both have 4.0s taking some unbelievably difficult courses. They attend their chapter socials, etc and just spent 36 hours awake and on their feet at Dance Marathon. It can be done!
/end of rant...and I'm only on my second cup of coffee.

All of this to say, we can't reclaim the past, or recreate/remold our college experiences.

I have only heard of AI twice in "real life" vs on GC. Once was actually in my husband's fraternity. A professor that taught in the major that most of the guys were in took a personal interest in many of them and in the house. After MANY years of his involvement in the men and in the fraternity, they conferred a special status to him so he is now considered an alum. He was probably in his 50's at the time and he did not pursue it! The other time was a well loved and long time NPC housemother that became an alumni initiate.

I know there are only two data points here, but do you see the theme? These two people had contributed to the organizations for years with no intent of this reward. Alumni status was conferred as a high honor and a way to convey heartfelt thanks.

I honestly don't know if my own NPC does AI, but if a grad student or young married gal approached my alumni group about it, I think we would give her a blank stare. Nothing personal, but it. . . just. . . isn't. . . done. . . at least where I come from. And to quote someone from earlier in the thread--it kind of creeps me out.

Unless you met girls from the ALUMNAE chapters, it really doesn't matter how sweet they are. The collegians will not be the ones voting you in.

I'm enclosing the only thing that could make this thread not blow chunks.

Well, jeepers, then, ok, that answers all of my questions, you're right, you should be IN! You were busy as an undergrad? Really? Gee, that sounds so unusual. That IS a special exception I bet. Hey, good luck with your "rushing" the national orgs. I bet it'll be everything you're expecting it to be and it'll be JUST like you didn't miss those precious 4 years of active undergrad membership. Hope your Big Sis spoils you bunches!

As far as I know, none of the four groups at TAMU-C (KD, Alpha Phi, Gamma Phi and Chi O) allow grad students to initiate as collegians. It sounds as if you are now seeking an undergrad experience as a grad student and that isn't going to happen. Alumnae initiation is a completely different thing and alumnae do not hang out with nor participate in daily collegiate chapter operations. I think you are quite confused about what you are looking for.

So true. All but one of the women in my group are old enough to be my mother. It’s a very informal group that meets once a month and the focus is primarily social, although they are involved in some community service projects. Are you OK with socializing with women who are more than likely older than you, and with whom you have nothing else in common with except your sorority affiliation? Because active alum participation is definitely not the kind of social experience you would’ve had as an undergrad. There aren’t any college “hi-jinks”, we don’t have socials or exchanges with other GLOs, and while everyone loves the sorority, they have children, grandchildren, husbands, aging parents, and a whole host of other things going on. It’s not glamorous, but that’s OK. I’m willing to bet most people would consider our get-togethers (gasp!) “boring”. So you wouldn’t necessarily experience the same kind of sisterhood or even support that you would expect if you were an undergrad, maybe living in the house, where any number of people could/might drop everything to “be there for you” however you needed/wanted them to. Does that make sense? Also, where I am, the local Tri Delta collegiate chapter was closed a couple years back, so there’s not even a collegiate chapter nearby, and the resulting bitterness and hard feelings by the local alums of that chapter has resulted in their decreased participation. So yeah, it’s definitely not college!

I so agree with the post above. I'll be blunt as well. If you went to school (Grad Girl 08) at A&M Commerce, then one of the sororities you're shopping is mine. My very humble opinion, FWIW, is that you didn't make time to pursue greek life while you were on campus. Many of my sisters were busy...beyond busy with studies in everything from performing arts majors to science majors and they still made time to be a part of our organization. I think you saying you had theatre hours 40 hrs/week and couldn't participate is a copout.

I agree.

Like many of my own sisters, I was involved in many different organizations - in addition to full time course loads with difficult majors AND working 30-40 hours a week.

We all made it work. There is no reason anyone else couldn't.