This used to be one of my managers at an old job.

"Fuckkk milwaukee cops. Seriously gonna b assholes to my girl Em of course when I'm not around. U know Id b snappin on they asses if I was there. I got 3 days off to sit in jail. Nbd. Wouldn't b the first time. Judgmental cunts. Ahhh!"

Wow, this person was in charge of other people??

Now that I've changed jobs, I've friended most of my co-workers, and the president and VP's wives.

This was the best autocorrect ever, from the VP's wife:

"Happy anniversary to the greasiest husband and ever!"

This dude is the least greasy dude ever--and this is at an engineering firm where none of the dudes are greasy.

From a friend on Facebook who goes to a community college:

"maaan i hayte english yo. Wats dat point, evrthang on computers now"

We can tell.

This has nothing to do with grammar.

If someone's Facebook page has nothing on it except "Happy Birthday" messages from the last three years, I'm not going to post "Happy Birthday" to them because they probably don't log on to see it anyway.

Bumpiing because there has to be some good ones out there!