Jacquelyn, you bring up an excellent point. There's been a lot of spending unaccounted for on the corporate credit cards. We need to stop this spending before it becomes a brush fire. We really need to clamp down on unnecessary expenses.

Does that mean you want me to cancel some orders? Mike in accounting wanted me to order him some porn, should I cancel that?

Also the big shot has been putting his private expenses on the credit card. What should we do?

Since I am in charge of spending, Im def seeing a HUGE amount spent on shoes, purses, booze, porn, and strippers. Should we tell everyone to limit it to just work related items?

lol

Can you please define unnecessary expenses??

Maybe we need to form a committee to review spending, see what's a financial drag. Or we could bring in a hired gun to review the numbers. We need some radical, integrated competence here.

this may be the place to bring in consultants.

I just want you in sales to all focus on STAR today - SERVICE TO RELATIONSHIP. Let's make friends with our customers, let's make them need us, and need our product.

Also please remember to SWAT - SELL WHAT'S AVAILABLE TODAY. Let's not be relying on the warehouse.

Our SPH are way down from LY and we need to do $3000 to make plan.

Any word on whose being looked at. They need to realize the the following items are allotted:
Starbucks
Daily Lunch
Shoes
Makeup/Skincare

Perhaps we should make sure they run the numbers a few times. Just to be on the safe side. I'm thinking this will take at least 6 months. Till then, continue as normal till results can be analyzed and new requirements are in place.

Speaking of unnecessary spending...Can we get company cell phones?? I really think we need them.

I think we'll need to develop and implement a strategic plan for the objectives we'd like to pursue with the consultants.

Stragtegic plan definitely. Possibly bring someone in for that as well.

Company cell phones, sounds good. Possibly consult someone for upgrading to Blueberries and get the phone subscription?

Anyone get the new memo on the water cooler?

I've heard that mu_agd is working on getting a Heineken water cooler for us, but we'll need to double-check that with Acquisitions ASAP. Did anyone get the conference call from corporate? I was on a coffee run so I missed the projectiles for next year.

So no matter what you do today, ask yourself, "Is this good for the company?"

Oh and by the way, next Friday is Hawaiian shirt day. So feel free to wear a Hawaiian shirt and jeans.

As a cost-cutting measure, the IT department would like to recommend that we migrate our existing Windows NT servers to Linux instead of Windows Server 2003.

A license for Windows Server 2003, Enterprise Edition, costs $3999. $3999 can buy a lot of beer. Just keep the beer out of the server room, please.

A Cinquain on Office Beer
 

Fosters
Australian Beer
Drinking Dancing Playing
Tasty Foamy Golden Goodness
Delish

Sorry to join the meeting so far behind the power curve. I've been doing lunch with a client. Can someone bring me into the loop?

Re: A Cinquain on Office Beer
 

You're waaay existential. :)

I think we're working on bringing in some outside forces to solve our little water cooler dilemna. Did you get any leads from the client? It's important to our five-year plan to follow up.

Let's not get into the summer slump!

Moving forward, we should also explore options of having Sierra Nevada and Widmer beer available.

I'll make sure everyone gets a memo on it.

We also need to explore the options of different water coolers in each office. Everyone needs to drink more.

Healthy employees are happy and productive employees.

Can you send that memo via e-mail? We're really trying to cut corners here if we're going to challenge the best of breed, and the place to start is office supplies. It's a quick win.

My office would like to request a cocktail watercooler in our area. Votes are undecided on what cocktail yet. I sent a memo around, should hear back COB.

Does this mean my office should NOT send a memo requesting that office supplies be replaced with ones in their favorite color?

Perhaps we need a staff meeting to find consultants for these needs?

I was told that I could listen to the radio at a reasonable volume from nine to eleven, I told bill that if Sandra is going to listen to her headphones while she's filing then I should be able to listen to the radio while I'm collating so I don't see why I should have to turn down the radio because I enjoy listening at a reasonable volume from nine to eleven.

Um yeah...I'm going to need you to email me that reminder to email the memo on Saturday.

I'm also going to need you to email that memo to everyone on Sunday too...we've got a whole new group coming in and they'll need to catch up on everything.

We're gonna need to go ahead and move you downstairs into storage B. We have some new people coming in, and we need all the space we can get. So if you could go ahead and pack up your stuff and move it down there, that would be terrific, OK?

Made me spit out my watercooler cocktail. lol.

Being part of the financial dept, it seems that we are spending much more than we are making. Any idea on if any of the work is actually getting done?

As for moving people to the storage area, great idea. I think it will def give us more space for other things.

Anyone up for some shopping for some new office furniture? Im thinking of grabbing some shoes as well, I hear some sales are going on.

We can save some expense dollars by not plugging them in. I mean, how warm can the water get?

and please, don't forget to give me my stapler back. it is causing me much grief to know that you are pretending it is yours.

on the heinekin watercooler front, we are good to go and just need to know when it should be installed. i was able to get the corporate rate for it.

OK it's been brought to my attention that some of you are taking liberties with the company dress code, so we're going to have a presentation by the HR director to remind everyone what is appropriate in the work place and what isn't.

halter tops and flip flops are kosher, correct?

I was told I could listen to my radio at a reasonable volume, I like to listen to my radio I was told I could listen at a reasonable volume during these hours...

Should a consultant be consulted for this dress code policy?

Are there discretionary funds in the budget for a consultant?

Oh, and excuse me, but who's cost center will it impact? I don't have a line item for consultants.

Project Time!
 

No consultants are necessary for the dress code meeting.

We will be "making over" people who do not meet or surpass our dress, hair, makeup and nail requirements.

Get ready people. It's going to be a blast!

Me either, we're still holding out for new colored office supplies.

They say that if you buy people the color and type of office supplies they want and like they are less likely to waste and over-consume because they are satisfied.

Re: Project Time!
 

Can we get the Fab Five in? While Kyan and Carson are making people over, Ted can work on the cafeteria food, Thom can remodel the office, and Jai can make sure we have only the best music for the sound system in the break room...

ETA: Ted can also help us pick the BEvERages for the office. ;)

Could not have said it better.


Also vote has come back. My office would like 2 coolers. One with pineapple juice and rum and one midori sour cooler. These will need to remain plugged in also to keep cool.

We will share with other offices.:D

Is this true? Can we get some case studies on this? What about a budget forecast using colored paper versus white paper?

Just got a request for scented as well. It adds something extra, don't you think. ;)