Happen to have her number?


I KID!!!!

Like use the term GDI? :rolleyes:

That set aside, I have huge issues with this statement. I was active at a small, very conservative campus, where I served as the president of College Dems and engaged in some pro-choice activism. I am sure that gave many people on campus a bad impression of my sorority. Are you implying I shouldn't have done it?

LOL, Banditone. :cool:

With regards to the GDI, while in some areas it's seen as a negative, it's not always. Some "GDIs" use the term because they're not Greek but hang out among Greeks, etc. My mom has paddles.... er... "wall plaques" from guys who were GDIs and put Gamma Delta Iota on the paddle.

When was this?
I know a woman was featured as a centerfold and mentioned she was in a sorority. I believe it was ZTA she is apart of. She never mentioned specifically. I also believe she was a collegian at the time.

Depending on where you went to school, sure. And even then there are always people who are anti-choice or are not Democrats. If anything I think the pro-choice activism would spark more bad impressions than being a Democrat.

And what about being openly homosexual or bisexual within a fraternity/sorority? I'm sure that would cause controversy at some campuses. Some people think that shows a lack of morals.

Thats an interesting point. If your group has a policy of not discriminating by sexual preference, then it would be hard to expell a homosexual member that was sexually promiscious . . .

Am I the only one hoping that she had the class to replace the felt on the pool table?

At my campus each chapter had very restrictive rules for sisters whether or not they were in letters. No dancing with a drink in your hand. No smoking in public. No visiting frat houses after 2am. Some may think this is ridiculous. These women are adults and should be allowed to do as they please. BUT, these women also chose to be members of organizations with standards.

You know the guy like signed the thing or something. Or just marked off a tally. Guys have a way different mindset on that sort of thing...

If you were trying to get rid of him/her for blatant and public promiscuity, then what would sexual orientation have to do with it? As long as the very public proof was undeniable, then what would be the problem? Certainly not their sexual orientation.

My thought was that as long as both heterosexual and homosexual members were held to the same standards, then it shouldn't be a problem. If heterosexual members were blatantly promiscuous and didn't get disciplined, then a homosexual member who did might have cause to claim bias/a double standard. But if issues of promiscuity were dealt with consistently in the chapter, then I wouldn't anticipate any sort of problem.

(And let's hope that one individual chapter didn't have too many issues of blatant promiscuity to deal with in any given school year, otherwise that could certainly be the sign of a larger issue...)

GDI is not an offensive term.

As for the second part, no. You should be allowed to do whatever you felt was right. However, I would most certainly have refrained from wearing letters at any such event, dicussing things like that in letters when I KNEW it was going to turn into a heated argument, and not mentioning the sorority while engaging in such activities.

Would you recomend expelling them for posing for playboy? No, thats a personal decision and as long as they're not advertising their letters in the pictorial, I don't see the big deal. Then again I like Playboy.

Would you recomend expelling them for taking their clothes off in a Steven Spielbergh Movie? No. It's art.

Drug use? If it was a huge problem (i.e. not just ocassional marijuana use), then probably.

Alcohol use? Again, not unless it was a huge issue or they were doing it in letters on a regular basis.

Shacking with 3 or 4 partners or more a semester? No, that's none of the sorority's business.

OK, as far as the whole sex thing goes....
Someone once told me:
If someone slept with another sister's boyfriend, its not a reason to be brought up. That is their own business to take care of, not ours.
If a girl sleeps with the whole football team and now everyone thinks that (some group) are sluts, then that is our problem.
We have a lot of rules on drinking. First and foremost, no where near the house or any other place near the sorority quads - no matter the age. You will be thrown out or denied to any event and even the house if you are drunk or had been drinking. Even if you are of age, no pictures unless it is at a public place where everyone is 21+. You are responsible for any dates you have at any events. If your date is drunk or does drugs just prior or at the event, its almost like if you had done it.

There are some people on the war path about this stuff at my school and one sorority has already been suspended from social activities for a full year.
Mostly because of pics on facebook!

The plain and simple thing is that if you wouldn't do it in front of grandma or that grandma would be ashamed, then don't do it.

Very well said. No one is forcing you to join a sorority, so by joining and remaining a member you are agreeing to abide by the standards (aka rules) of the organization.

Yes, it most certainly is!

Who cares?

Apparently that would be fantASTic, Geeky Penguin, and myself. Perhaps some others as well.

We don't need your stamp of approval on what's discussed.

1. If she tied her letters to it, yes. If she didn't even say she was in a sorority...I don't know. I don't have a problem with Playboy but I know some sisters would.
2. Again...letters?
3. Letters? Dealing? Smoking/snorting in public (like at a party) or doing it in chapter housing...yes. But there's something to be said here...if NO ONE knows, then how can you get in trouble? In other words, keep it to yourself. Then it can't be a problem.
4. Letters? Drunk to the point of blackout consistently? Causing them to do things like the aforementioned sex on the pool table? First I personally would like to offer them help, like support in going to an AA meeting. If they wouldn't accept that and wouldn't change their behavior then yeah...see yeah.

Again, to some people, maybe, but others use it to describe themselves. It depends on the campus culture.

You know, I've heard that before but for the life of me I can't understand how calling anyone a "God Damned anything" couldn't be considered offensive.

Maybe some people describe themselves that way but that doesn't mean that it's okay for Greeks to do it. No one in my chapter used the term. It was considered a lowly form of communicating. The word "independent" works just fine.

We could call them, The Alphabetically Challenged . . . :) TAC for short.

I've always found that calling people by their first names tends to work pretty well.

I find this all very interesting- it's funny while I was in school there was girl who was in Playboy (ended up being a playmate) who was in the chapter to one side of me, the chapter on the other side, had a member who "danced" at a gentlemen's club in Washington, DC.
Another chapter had a member who had a child- and the kid was in bid day pictures and I believe wore letters- it was somewhat scandalous- definitely was shocking to my 18 year old brain at the point (10 + yrs ago)- and I definitely thought that being an unwed mother was not your typical sorority girl behavior.

After I graduated a one of the sisters of my chapter got pregnant & gave the baby up for adoption. Her parents wanted nothing to do with her- they basically disowned her. My chapter took care of her, advisors gave her maternity clothes etc. she lived in the house during her pregnancy and was very involved w/ PH. I remember thinking it was bizarre and really not
an "ideal" situation, but then I thought about how she was surrounded by women who cared for her, had people watching out for her, making sure she ate well, etc. and I know now it all worked out...

but honestly when I think "sorority girl" do I think lamaze class? NO.

Or gee, I dunno "Gosh Darned?" That's the first phrase that comes to my mind.
(And I'll bet you anything the GD in GDI came from the Is themselves.)

This isn't a racial or ethnic slur with social context where it's ok for people to self-identify but not ok for the majority to use the same term. It's a silly little phrase that isn't really a big deal. No one is condeming anyone to hell by using it. I'm so glad your chapter was above such a lowly form of communicating. :rolleyes: That's so totally impressive. On your campus that was "normal." That is why I said "it depends on the campus culture."

I've seen pictures on myspace where a girl from one of our chapters has a baby and the daughter wears little ASA shirts and comes to recruitment.

Reeeealllllyyyy......

To each their own, I suppose.

"Gosh Darned"? Are you serious? Who these days uses the term "gosh darned"? Do you go to school in Mayberry?

Well, since you can only bet and I could only bet, it's a moot point.

I just think it's hypocritical. I see all the moaning about bad images of Greeks on this message board, yet people don't even think about their own behavior. (I'm not directing that at you, Drolefille. It's just in general.)

Do these women know when they accept their bids that they'll be forced to possibly alter their behavior as a condition of membership? I mean, groups and rushees are told not to talk about drinking or smoking or boys at rush, how could they know they'll have to conduct themselves in a certain manner regarding these things? Do you tell them that during rush or on bid night?

And as for all these girls who are apart of (actually, the proper grammar would we "apart from") a sorority, I don't understand how anything they do would matter since they're not members. :confused:

We've got a lot of chapters at small schools with untraditional populations. To ignore that fact and/or not embrace it there would hinder our recruitment abilities.

Would you kick your biological sister out of your house if she got pregnant? If not, then why would you do it to your sorority sister?

As you said, that's probably not the ideal situation. (Ideally, her parents would have stood by her. :mad:) But how wonderful that the chapter rallied around her and provided her with the support she needed.

I don't think the big surprise (for me, anyow) is so much that the sisters still stand by her, as the fact that the baby was at recruitment events. I have kids, but I definitely wouldn't take them to recruitment. (There are kid-friendly events, and then events that are not so suited for kids. IMO, of course.)

Though I am semi-surprised that a young woman with a baby would remain an active undergraduate member of the chapter. (Only because of the time and financial commitment involved in undergraduate sorority life - seems like it might conflict with child-rearing and school obligations.) Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that the sister should be kicked out either! I'm just thinking that - if it were allowable according to the terms of that group - it seems like that would be an appropriate circumstance to allow someone to take alumnae status early. She would remain a sister, be able to participate in events, yet not have the mandatory event or dues obligations that come with being an undergraduate member.

I can't even imagine trying to make all the chapter meetings, pay my dues, etc. while also raising/financially supporting a child and attending/paying for school. Yikes! I'm not suggesting the early alumnae status thing as a way to "hide" or "shame" a sister who happened to get pregnant while in school - rather as a way to possibly make her life a little easier.

Actually ideally the unplanned pregnancy would have been prevented...

It was wonderful that the chapter supported her when her family wouldn't and the greek system as a whole was v. supportive as well.

Well, yes...I suppose you're right. :o Perhaps I should re-state my orignal post to read that the second-ideal situation would have been for her biological family to stand by her, with the ultimate ideal situation to be that she didn't have to go through the situation at all.

(Though I suspect that the adoptive family is grateful that things happened the way they did...)

I think the way my chapter did it back in the day is a good medium..
We wouldn't kick a woman out for becoming pregnant, but we would ask her to go alum or inactive (depending on if she was planning to keep the child or give it up). I know to some of you that means the same thing but we had very involved alumnae so it would work. Our perspective on it was that she is moving on to another partof her life and would need time and money to focus on a child rather than her sorority commitments. She would still be able to have a supportive community of sisters and still wear our letters and claim affiliation, but would be able to devote herself to raising a child (if she chose). A pregnancy is a very tough experience (especially unwed) and a member doesn't need to be thinking about paying dues or attending all kinds of mandatory events during it.

As for behavior.... We signed a code of ethics stating that we would follow all sorority rules & state and national laws or we could be held accountable by our chapter-- Last time I checked, drugs are still illegal and I'm pretty sure every chapter should have a blanket no tolerance rule on that.

I know who she's talking about, and I have to add, that this woman is not only a mom AND a sorority sister - she's the PRESIDENT of her chapter.:eek:
That is some woman for you. She must have all kinds of support, and I think that's great. Don't get me wrong, it IS completely unconventional, but still none the less amazing.

I think you learn a lot about what is acceptable behavior and what isn't during the New Member period. You either get with the program or you take a hike.

But, do you really want to be recruiting strippers and girls posing nude in magazines?

That wasn't my question. My question is do the girls know what they're getting into before they pay fees for rush or sign a bid that binds them for a year to this group. Considering the poster said all the sororities on her campus are like this, I'm guessing the possible membership pool is pretty homogenous and they're not going to complain about Draconian rules.

I'd rather have a stripper or a centerfold who is an active member and a loving sister than a born again Christian who blows off all her duties and continually hurts other sisters by her lack of support. But I guess my priorities are just messed up.

Um, the phrase I've heard most often is "Gosh Darned Independant" mostly because people choose to say that over saying "God Damned."

I can only bet because I'm not familiar with the entire history of the phrase, and neither are you.

I fail to see how saying GDI or even "God Damned Independant" equates bad behavior. Again, you keep ignoring that it is campus culture. I'm sure the guys who gave my mom paddles with GDI on them feel really oppressed right now.