My parents are like honeychile's....even if I could pay them money for living here, they wouldn't accept it. I'm an only child biologically, and my step-father has four grown children (all of them have children, so I'm the youngest of his kids) so my step-dad is one of the biggest deterrents for me to give him any money. He told me tonight that all he wants to do is make sure that my schooling is paid for, so he's not concerned with how much money it costs for me to live at home...food wise, I eat a lot less than he does (my mom and I together probably equal what he eats, so it's not too much difference if it's just my parents or I'm living here as well) I also get some good rates for my car insurance (which my parents pay) as well as the other bills. I do pay my own medical insurance (which is over $200 per month) and I'm working on paying off some of my student loans with my biological father's help (through the divorce settlement my parents arranged many years ago). I'm also doing lots of things around the house that help my parents out, so even if I'm not directly contributing monetarily to the household, I'm still pulling my fair share of everything.

My parents are also concerned about where I go, so I make sure they know where I'm going and if I'm running late or something, I give them a quick call to let them know what's going on. I really don't mind doing it....after 23 and a half years of living, I'm used to keeping them updated with what's going on and I don't want to worry them unnecessarily! :)

Having grown up in a very traditional parental background and being the daughter in the family, my parents would never condone me moving out until the day I get married.

Let's see....three of the guys I have dated in the past year have lived at home. (Two were 21, one was almost 26). Which means when we wanted to be alone somewhere, it was almost always my apartment....I didn't really mind, but it is kind of a weird situation. I did hang out once with the one guy at his parents' house, because he kind of has his own wing or whatever, but it just felt awkward making out with him when his parents were right downstairs.

i could never live at home again (even for summers or breaks anymore) because of my parents current house. its hard to explain coming home drunk as shit at 4 am to your parents when there bedroom is across the hall from you and there is no way to sneak in.

This particular studio was at about 81st and Madison -- Upper East Side. It was OK physically -- just small. Remember, this is not even a one bedroom. Just one room with separate bath and small kitchenette.

At least it wouldn't cost much to furnish.

ETA I looked at housing in Santa Monica a couple of years ago, and you could find a one bedroom or even a one bedroom and den for a fair amount less.

So are you moving to NYC?

I should know this Friday whether they're going to tender an offer, and I'll make a decision very quickly if they do.

In some ways, it will be easier if they don't and I don't have to decide. Commuting home every couple of weeks will be OK, but it might be easier to stick with status quo...

It's just that NYC is he number one TV market in the country. I never really wanted to work there until I outgrew all of the other markets besides LA...

Good luck whatever happens. I wish you the best! :)

I don't think I could go back to living with the parents; but I don't know, my circumstances allow me to live away from home and do ok.

Living in Boston is a drain on the finances, no question; but I got a good apartment at a great price in Brookline (suburb on the border of Boston) and it all worked out well.

However, there may be circumstances where I'll have to move back...you just never know.

I will say this though - I can cook, clean, and take care of myself when necessary.

We've been looking for studios and one-bedrooms across the park (West 70s-90s) and I haven't found anything that much yet! I might end up trying out Brooklyn Heights, Park Slope or Williamsburg if the prices are much more than what I'm paying just a few blocks up--and I'm willing to pay $1500 for a studio if it's nice.

I'm 24 and have lived at home all along. I had apartments in college, but would visit frequently, and always stayed home for the summers. FI did the same thing. We both felt like it was kind of expected.

I'll be living at home until I'm married, whcih is in exactly 4 months! FI and I bought a condo 2 weeks ago; he'll be moving in soon.

He lived with his parents post-graduation because he was unemployed. After he found a job, he continued/continues to live at home. It's not ideal, but the tradeoffs were that he could buy me a gorgeous engagement ring cash, have money for a downpayment on a house, and still have plenty of savings in the bank.

Neither of us pay rent, but we both do help out a lot. FI does the yard work for his parents, does housecleaning, laundry, cooking (he's totally domestic!) I help my mom with the housework, the grocery shopping, etc. We don't pay rent, but we do "earn our keep"

I see no problem with living at home if you are (1) in school (college, technical school, whatever), OR (2) you are contributing to the household, via paying rent, bills, and/or buying groceries...

I lived at home during various points thoroughout college (I currently don't live at home). My mother required that I pay her rent, and I resented her for it b/c: (1) I am a first-generation college student, (2) I am paying my own way through school and working (3) I help her and my siblings out financially when I can and when it's needed...Not to mention the fact that the last time I lived at home I didn't even have my own room (or a room even) to sleep in, and she was charging me an amount for rent that wasthisclose to what I could've paid to have a roommate. :mad: Also, she expected me to come home at 11pm and wash other people's dishes and clean-up other people's mess :eek: :rolleyes: (mind you, I was paying rent and she expected me to do this. And sh held the fact that I needed to live at home shortly over my head and in my face whenever she could..So, needless to say, I can't imagine myself living ther again and putting myself through te drama unless I was going to be homeless (and even then, I would still hesitate about moving back there)...

Okay, I can see people living at home either for college, emotional support, financial reasons, whatever. What I find a little odd and quite frankly disturbing is a girl (23 years old) who is fully capably of supporting herself deciding that she couldn't hack it and moving back home. The reason I find this disturbing is not because she decided she needed to move back home, but because she decided to move in with her parents instead of living with her husband! (Her parents and husband both lived in completely different states) To my mind being married to someone means that you are now committed to this person and tied by certain bonds. One of these bonds is that if you're going to live with anyone it should be the person to whom you're married. Whatever floats her boat though . . .

That must have been before they repealed rent control in Santa Monica. Now, a cheap one bedroom is $1500, average is $1900 and up.

If someone has to live at home, that's cool. I just knew before I got married or lived with a man, that I would have to live on my own. I didn't want to go from my Daddy's house to the sorority house to my husband's house. But, not everyone has it so well. People lose jobs, get divorced. Houses burn down or are flooded.

That's probably true. Still, for that money in Manhattan, you get a 15x20 foot "studio."

For anything less, you put the key in the doorlock and break the window on the other side of the "room."

No question LA is expensive, but not as expensive as NY.

Plus Santa Monica is gross.

-Rudey
--There are way more street people there than in NY ewwww.

If I do move there, I'll be working at about 67th & 3rd, so that's the epicenter where I'll concentrate my search because I really want to walk to work, etc. if that's possible. Lots of neat stuff around there, too, as you know.

There are a fair number of studios in that price range in the Times online classifieds -- but I chatted with a realtor and he tells me that they rent in a hurry.

Be nice to hear yes or no from the potential employer so I can make a final decision.

Oh I sooo feel you on that one. I am in college and since I went back to get certified to teach, I get no financial aid other than loans, so everything is out of pocket for me. There is really no way to go to school full-time and make enough on a part-time job to pay rent, car insurance, and pay for school. My parents are sadly mistaken if they think I am going to pay rent and I am already paying for everything myself. They did not pay a dime for anything the entire time I was in college. So I would not be over exaggerating to call us somewhere close to even.

Dr. Phil has a link on his site --

"Want Dr. Phil's Help Getting MOOCHER To MOVE OUT?"



https://www.drphil.com/drphilplugger...ugId=A96700001

Most people I've talked to go through the Village Voice. Brokers are good if you're from out of town and need a nice place in a pinch. I have friends who got a broker apartment for their first year and ended up someplace a little cheaper by going through either people they know or the VV.

Yeah, I really like the UES, but it just doesn't make sense for me going to school in Morningside Heights. Maybe after I'm out of here. :)

So...how's your relationship with your parents?

I have lost a LOT of respect for my father over the summer (long story). I'm sick of certain extended family members starting drama with our household. Once I leave, I don't know if I want to associate with my family on a regular basis. They pretty much know that and are trying to do ANYTHING to keep me home. If everything goes the way I expected, I can leave next summer! I think our relationship would've been better if I left earlier!

This is really interesting.
I went to college and came home to live with my parents. I had been in a really bad car accident involving a semi and still needed help. Then right after I finally finished all the therapy and surgeries I needed I tore my ACL which meant more down time (this was from 2002-2004). I had a full time job the entire time, but my parents wouldn't take money from me. They always had it in their head I would just live at home until I was married. As soon as I was recovered from my ACL tear I moved out. My parents were SO upset, but I was 24! Had I not needed help because of the situations I was in I would have been out sooner. My parents and I are EXTREMELY close, but I am too independant. Now they would HATE for me to move home.
My company shut down in April and I was out of work for two months. Because I worked for a non profit unemployment wouldn't kick in. I appealed and won, but for a month and a half I had NO income and not enough in savings to cover everything .My parents gave me a loan to tide me over. I've since paid them back, but that is how it is in my family.

My relationship with my parents is great; it's evolved enough over the years that they show that they care, but at the same time don't try to stick themselves too much into my business. They know that I have my own life and that they don't have a whole lot of control right now.

At the same time, when I had health trouble the past couple of years, they've been amazing at being able to drop what they're doing and be here as quickly as possible.

I couldn't see myself being able to live at my parents house at this point, since it's been so long since that's happened, but my relationship with them couldn't be any better.

Funny this is a topic right now...my husband and I were just arguing about it. He'll be separating from the service in January. We're hoping to move to another state, where we just looked at houses this weekend. He was freaked because the cost of living is a little higher there. We've got money saved and all, but I haven't been working...I'll be having our second child in November. He's just had a major injury, so he's hoping that he'll be able to fall into a military-assisted help job.

Being Hispanic, my husband comes from some of the same schools y'all have mentioned. He immediately said, "We can't afford it. We'll just move in with my mom." She has plenty of room, but I just don't think so. There are any number of reasons why adults may be forced to move back in with their parents, I just wouldn't want to!

I moved out when I was 18 and havent been back since. I come home sometimes for weekends to visit and when I finished college I went home for two months. But other than that I havent ever moved in to the rents house after leaving for college. My family and I are close. I talk to my dad everyday, mostly about business stuff, and my mother almost every other day. Usually I talk to my brother every couple of days but within the last month and a 1/2 I've been talking to him like every other day. He decided to follow my lead and went into the same field of business as I did. In doing so, he has a million questions to ask me and so we speak to each other all the time.

When I lived at home I was the bad child. I was the one who threw all the parties, always got busted. I'd have the entire cool population of my highschool at my parents house with an endless supply of beer and weed despite me not even drinking or smoking till my Senior year. I always got busted and got blamed for parties even if my brother had his friends there, too. Both of us had the police bring us home a couple of times, but my brother got arrested more. I had several girls try to say they were pregnant with my kid but DNA tests proved otherwise. If anything went wrong in our neighborhood all the neighbors blamed me or my brother. I always had the school calling my parents because of something I did that was fucked up. My friends and I got busted for writing our names on the football field's grass in diesel 3 days before graduation. We got busted for writing all of our initials all over the baseball dugouts. My crew and I got in trouble for coming to the class above our's graduation all fucked up on shroom tea and for having a 30 minute conversation with the school resource officer about how he didnt know shit. :D I jumped off a bridge nakked in front of the whole school and was almost expelled. And I would have been expelled had I not gotten the principal his job in the first place due to me telling him some kid brought a gun to school when I was in 7th grade and he busted him and was made principal of the highschool cause he looked tough on bad behaivor.

All that aside, I was still a good kid until I got to college and my parents and I maintain a close relationship. However, the only way I'd move home would be if I was building a house and needed free rent for the time it was being built. Other than that, you couldn't pay me to live at home again. Sometimes I get the feeling like they're always going to look at me like I'm still their little boy. I guess you can count me lucky, they do give me all the space I need. If I don't answer my phone....they stop calling and let me call them back. My girlfrined, though, her mother will call 5,6,7 times in a night if she doesnt answer....fucking bitch. :mad:

I moved 2 and a half hours away when I went to college, so 18 was probably the last time I REALLY lived at home with my mom. And I will tell you, I don't think I could ever do it again. My mom is pretty controlling. She drives me up the wall even without living under the same roof!

Living in my own place throughout college really made me independent and kind of set in my ways. I would not want to have to live under her rules again. When I would go home for vacations and stuff, I was pretty much free to come and go as I pleased, she just asked that I let her know if I was going to be really late or not come home that night. Perfectly understandable because I know she worried.

After I graduated, I considered moving back to Dallas and home, but instead decided to just pick up my life and move to a city where I didn't know anyone and just be out on my own. And I still think it was one of the best decisions I have ever made. It made me responsible for myself very quickly. She ended up moving down to Austin almost a year after I did. I know she mainly did it to be closer to me (hello- only child), but at that point, it just felt really good to have her at least in the same city again.

When money was really tight for me a few months ago, I debated whether I should move back in with her for awhile or get a teeny tiny efficiency on my own. I decided to stay on my own, mainly because it is just better for my relationship with her. We get along MUCH better when we don't live together.

I feel like right now I have the best of both worlds.... I can take care of myself and support myself, but my mom is wonderful and she is close enough that if and when I need something she can help. It is great. :)

I completely understand some people moving back home for awhile to get on their feet... But I don't really understand people just living at home to mooch off their parents, or guys who live at home because their mother babies them so much and they don't want to have to take care of themselves.

Also, I don't think that my family would ever be the kind to say, "You can't leave home until you're married." I'm way too independent for that.

I think alot of parent's would be proud to see their kids out there on their own trying to take care of themselves. As I told my mom, they should be proud to have raised such independent, strong, and competent adults. :) Not trying to say that people who live at home aren't, but you know what I mean.

Sorry for the long post. :)

I havent lived with family since I was 18.

Cant imagine it now. But thats just cause it woudl be wierd. If push came to shove, I could do it I guess.

In Florida we can't be moochers because there's no basements for us live in down here. And I'd be damned if I got stuck with being put in the attict.

Shoot - I WISH I could. Imagine the $$$ that could be saved (while helping with bills of course).

Let's see...
I now have a Mortgage, GAS bill, water bill, garbage bill, satellite bill, telephone bill, internet bill, insurance bill, not to mention groceries, diapers, formula, school supplies, etc.... why'd I want to grow up so fast again???:(

Hm, interesting.

I moved out to go to college & came back when I was finally done. My job pays me enough to move out on my own if I budget myself real well but since I am to be married in January, it just made more sense to stay at home w/my mom & 2 sisters. The house Mike & I bought will be finished being built in October but he'll move in before me & I'll move in after the wedding. I don't call people losers for still living at home at any age but it does make me wonder if they have ever tried being entirely independent at least once in their lives.

I have lived at the dorms until this year. I wanted to save some money since I have one more semester left.

Anyway, my great grandmother moved in with us, and things have become stressful for me. I have to share my room with my 12 year old sister and she leaves food wrappers and chip bags in my room (ewww...) I shared a room with my sister for almost all my life. I liked it until last year. I have grown tired of it. I love my family, but I NEED my own space. My friends have their own spaces. After I graduate, I will get a good job, get my driver's license and move out.

i moved out when i went to college. haven't lived with them since i was 18.

i got all that too.....but mortgage is WAY better than rent.

don't forget about the condo association