armpit massage. with all the hairy armpits these drag queens had to go through, the guys in return offered to give them their thick, long, and juicy.............

Famous kosher Sabbrett hot dogs! Funny, you wouldn't think hillbillys knew Jewish cuisine, but they do!

So, they went outside and lit the bbq grill, but accidentally forgot to...

...put on music, so they ran back inside and put "Color me Bad" in the CD player, and began dancing the horizontal chicken dance again...

then champ declared war on texas, new york, and florida. after the people in these states were slaughtered, he moved the nation's capitol to california...and then

the budget crisis, earthquakes, and fires drove all the good looking people back to NY. The desert trash didn't make it through the journey. Rudey was selected for his great genes to help fornicate. He chose a beautiful woman named...

-Rudey

named kitso, but kitso was really a guy who shaved his whole body and put on a dress...but still, rudey made sweet love to him without knowing she was a he....and then

Iowa Hawkeye. But then Rudey found out she was a fake and only wanted him for his fat stacks. Rudey threw her bitch ass to the crib.

did you just skip my post dude??

thats mean :(

(back to the story)

...they decided that they wanted to have a family. However, to do that meant they needed cloning technology and a surrogate mother. so they went to...

...Arnold Schwarzenegger, and started to tell him all about their idea. He sat there and listened, all the while stroking his....

...cat. Arnold then pointed out that human cloning was illegal, but as governor of Kaleefornyuh he would see to its legalization...

After all, he is a part of the Kennedy Clone -- I mean Clan -- at least by his marriage to...

Barbara, the elf with a pituitary problem. Barbara didn't want Arnold to legalize cloning until...

she got what she wanted. Arnold knew that no bills can pass without Barbara's support and mandatory demands. So, Barbara demanded that they make the playboy mansion their new govenor's mansion, the sex bunnies their servants, and to also move the capitol. She also wanted Hefner to make her one of his...........

...Pipe racks. So, she ended up holding a quivering, smoldering...

pipe (metaphor):p Barbara was liking this a whole lot better than being a governor's wife. and she was getting a little too close to ol' hugh. arnold didnt appreciate this. but his head is so big, that he wont admit something is bothering him. so this strange setup in the Playboy mansion continues. but things go to far when barbara gets talked into posing for Playboy's 'ladies of politics' issue.
......

...with an american flag delicately draped over her unmentionable areas. arnold, being a republican, believed this to be a sacrilege. so he went to his protestant church and...

...punched the alter boy, just then a bolt of lightening struck arnold and he was....

reminded that there are no alter boys in the Protestant Church. He had punched one of the...

packs of sushi. "Is anyone hungry?" they all asked. They started to dole out sushi to the masses when...

the taste of wassabi shot their nose right off and into the mixture of chicken fried rice. Everyone's nose began to bleed as if they had been sniffing.....

Fun Dip. Then Tom Earp being of unsound mind and body screamed out........

"MORE, BABY!!! MORE!!!" Little did he know that his mother had heard that. She grounded him for a month and punished him by...

covering him in mayo and letting the dogs lick it off. She thought this would punish him until....

she saw the huge smile on his face. He thought he had finally figured out what "sink o de mayo" means (groan! terrible pun, I appologize), so he called up all of his Hispanic friends and invited them to...

his annual streaking party. The last 5 people to cross the finish line had to jump up and down butt naked singing..........

The "Salute Your Shorts" Theme song as Tom's boxers are being sent up the flag pole. ...............when suddenly......

...everybody present loudly asserted that they were not drunk and that they most assuredly had not been drinking margartias (just look at how well they're typing...). However, the fact that they were singing the "Salute Your Shorts" theme song gave away the sad fact that...

While boxers flying in air with little care and Three Jackasses were placed at the Corner for all to see and Name, Hootie, OTW, DeltaAlum, Life, kitso arrived for the Name The Jack Ass Contest!

While "NOT Drinking Tekillya" they put their heads together and dicided to call the JackAsses:

"Damn," those are three good looking hounds. I wonder who all those other...

...fabulous people are. Especially that cute one with the glasses and awesome hair. MmmmMMMMmmm. I wonder what her name is. And why she's wearing that kickass Theta Pi sweatshirt."

They decided to move closer, only to discover....

the "girl" in question was a genuine Thai ladyboy!! :eek:
The three guys in question figured what the hell and...

turned their attention to the other two. after a llittle conversation much to their surprise...