When I was a PNM there was this one chapter that was double rushing (two pnms to one active) and I swear to god that the active that was rushing me and this other girl completly ignored me! She kept asking (Melanie was her name) all these questions and I kept trying to jump in and she'd just brush me off. This was only round one too! Needless to say I cut that chapter and who knows if they cut me cause I got all of my number ones back for the next round. It's funny cause Melanie went another chapter anyway and I have class with her this semester and can I say what a dull crayon!

When I rushed, there was one house that just didn't impress me at all.

They asked rushees what their parents did for a living -- tacky!

They didn't take the skit seriously at all, and kept messing up and laughing through it. You're not joining the house for the skit, but it shows how serious they are about making a good impression on you, and this was obviously not something they were too worried about.

The conversation I had with a girl at Pref was exactly like the one I had on the first day. ("Where are you from?" "What's your major?" blah blah blah.)

At another house, one of my rushers and I got onto the subject of drivers' licenses, since my sister was about to get hers. We were relating funny driving stories, and she told me about the time that she had accidentally broken the side mirror off some car in a parking lot and then drove off without leaving a note for the car's owners or anything. I don't think you want to be giving the impression that all ABCs are juvenile delinquents . . . :p I liked that house, but I think that ABC's story caused me to rank it lower than it otherwise would have been.

At another house that I LOVED, apart from this incident, I was rushed by a girl with a mouth like a sailor. I only talked to her for about 3 minutes, and I know she at least said "No isht!" and "You're f@$!ing kidding me!" during the time I talked to her. Who does stuff like that during rush?


Also, I agree with the sitting on the floor thing -- it's so hard to get up without flashing the entire room if you're wearing a skirt!

speaking of saying the wrong thing...
 

At one house I was talking to a sister about our love for scrapbooking. We were talking about how much fun it is to go to crafts stores and buy stickers and what not.... Well, the girl proceeded to tell me how a friend introduced her to an ALL scrapbooking store in town and she said: "I was so excited... that I almost orgasmed!" :eek: :eek: :eek:

Needless to say, I had to bite my tongue from laughing in her face! She didn't even flinch once she said that b/c I'm sure that she's used to saying that with her friends. Either way, she came off as a total ditz!

I didn't end up at that house, but I still see the girl around campus and at greek events... and I have to bite my tongue each time!

Re: speaking of saying the wrong thing...
 

LMAO!!!!!!!

Re: speaking of saying the wrong thing...
 

WOW. Must be some store. ;)

The thing that got on my nerves the most -
At one of the houses I rushed my freshman year, one girl kept would look completely bored, but then when I would say something or ask a question, she would perk up really quickly, and then as soon as she answered, she looked bored again. My rush group called her the "Insta-spirit" girl when we talked later.

It was a little wierd to have these girls I had never met before hugging me constantly, but it didn't really bother me. I thought they were sweet.

Are you serious, CG??? That seriously ticks me off. Did the stupid bimbo think Panhel gave the DZ colonization team a list of who was cut by the "top" sororities so they'd know not to bid them???

:rolleyes:

Not only did our Pi Chis say that but they were very against anyone dropping out for DZ. They tried to talk me out of it....but they were constantly telling everyone only use DZ as a last option....stay in Recruitment...blah blah blah...its funny another girl I know who dropped out after second round for DZ is one of my sisters.

I didn't (and still don't) like the rivalry that flares up between chapters. we're a small school so EVERYTHING gets around, I don't feel like it's as bad with my pledge class or the one above it, but there are a few upperclassmen girls in two of the chapters (mine included) who always like to point the dirty rushing finger or talk bad about the other sorority or make up stories that just aren't true!!!! I don't feel this rivalry and I know that there are members of the other chapter who don't either, but somehow it always get stirred up and creates a tension that has to be hidden from the pnms. I'm hoping that this fall won't be this way, I know that my chapter has made an active choice not to say anything negative about the other chapters so hopefully things will be better. It's just the one part of the fall that I am NOT looking forward to!

Never rushed... joined a colony instead.

LOL, there were many things that I didn't like about rush! I'm just not one for all that, I don't know, stuff.

At one house, there were 2 sisters for every PNM. I thought this was AWFUL because it ended up being the 2 sisters talking to each other the whole time like I wasn't there. Ho hum...

I also hated all the singing and clapping. Seriously, what does that have to do with whether or not I want to be a member of your organization?! I don't particularly like singing or doing clappy things, so it just annoyed me, not to mention that I don't think that you learn much of anything of substance from watching it, plus you have to sit there pretending that you find it just awesome. Really, and I hate to admit it, but I feel the same way about skits. They can be cute and all, but what's the point? I'd rather spend more time having an at least somewhat engaging conversation.

I was so intimidated by rush and was so nervous the whole time! Luckily I went through it with a friend and were in the same rush group.

The sororities were all pretty diverse and I was so excited about that. I am Asian, but I've always had friends from different races. I grew up in San Francisco and I knew that I wanted to be part of an ethnically diverse sisterhood. I was excited about my firs party and I didn't really think twice when I was automatically paired with an Asian girl. But, the whole time I was at the party, I noticed I had only talked to Asian girls! The same thing happened to my friend, who is Latina.

It got better the second night when I got a chance to meet other girls, but the first night really turned me off. I guess they thought I would feel more comfortable or something. I didn't.

Actually, I asked it of the house I am now in, and I was not told the truth. I know b/c I'm a sister! The PNM's don't need to know the nitty gritty, but a general, truthyful explination gives the PNM's the respect and the info they deserve.

At Wisconsin, we only clap and sing while the rushees are coming into the house or leaving it. Do other schools do it during the actual time set aside for talking? For some reason I assumed they all did it the way we do.

I agree on the skits -- I mean, they're fun, but in the long run they're really a waste of time and they tell you almost nothing about the chapter. That's one of the reasons why my chapter contemplated not doing one next fall and just using the skit time to get to know the girls better. We eventually decided against that, since every other sorority on campus does a skit, but decided that instead of just doing a normal skit, we would do a combination skit/slideshow that incoporated Tri Delta facts, quotes and pictures of the activities we do (Homecoming, Humorology [like Greek Sing], Trick or Treat with the Greeks, etc.) that would at least let them know a little more about our chapter than the average skit.

Our chapter incorporates facts into their skit. It's a great way to keep the PNMs entertained while learning something about our sisterhood.

We also only did the clapping and singing as they PNMs were walking in and walking out. In between would have been way too distracting and a little intimidating!

Re: what did you not like about rushing?
 

I really think every sorority both nationally and locally work to maximize conversation time in the house, and to give every prospective member an opportunity to meet people and to present herself as a potential sister.

PNMs are bound to be turned off by different things that might not offend or bother another PNM- I mean they are rushing into one house and out of another, it's hot outside and your make-up is melting, it's fast-paced-- at some houses sisters are snapping fingers or doing jazz hands instead of clapping when the president speaks, strangers are patting you on the back, you're being asked the same questions over and over.... holding your pee and smiling as you drink yet another class of water with lemon.... all the while trying to figure out where you belong.... That's quite a juggling act!

My best advice to the sororities as you head into recruitment: Do your homework in the form of a needs-assessment workshop. What kind of woman do you want and need in the chapter? Pour over those applications, know the girls coming in who are legacies or who have recommendations. Invent a name game or make posters for pre-Recruitment week to learn about who your top choices are (your top choices on paper, that is! Nothing is set until you meet them, but doing this exercise, you have a headstart!).

Also, do an assessment of your chapter-- make sure all of your members know about the sorority! Nothing is more embarrassing than a member who can't tell a PM about her philanthropy or who can't come up with a good sisterhood story when a PM asks, "How has XYZ really been there for you?" Make sure all members are equipped with key points to help the PNM learn about and want to be a part of your chapter.


Good luck!

Re: Re: what did you not like about rushing?
 

It certainly should not be a canned answer, and I've heard stories before about how all of the XYZ's told the same "personal sisterhood story" during a round (hopefully this is just sorority urban legend though!)

There's nothing wrong with making sure each sister who's rushing knows what her chapter actually *does*, and what her sisters mean to her--and that each one can effectively communicate her thoughts and opinions when a PNM asks her rusher, "Why are you an XYZ and why should I be an XYZ?" IMHO, if they can't answer that for whoever asks them that question, they shouldn't be on the floor. Period. Mock rush exercises are great things, I strongly encourage them for anyone who needs practice with recruitment conversation. Even better--they're lots of fun!

Poor conversation skills will offend a PNM folks! You've got to be able to make her at home in your home and talk with her, never at her or to her!

Y'all will never believe this but when I was assistant to the PH Director at Mississippi State, this one NPC chapter decided that they would only refer to each other at parties as "Sister Brown", "Sister Smith", etc., instead of Amanda or Jessica or whatever. We heard about it in the PH office during the first round and told them it was annoying the rushees but they said they wanted to do it because it highlighted their sisterhood.

You guessed it, they were cut by about 90% of the PNMs after first parties. The girls who didn't cut them that day did it the next one, it seemed. A week later, we sent out a survey for women who had rushed and most of them wrote about how much they hated that.

carnation, I think that tops every recruitment story I've ever either seen or heard of! Catholic school twilight zone flashbacks, at least :)

Just a quick question? Are you allowed to touch the rushees? At Michigan State we are not allowed to touch the rushees that is a rush infraction.....

When I went through rush (granted this was a long time ago) the sororities had singing and clapping stuff not just as the rushees were walking in or out, but also for a while after that. I remember standing on the sidewalk for a while in front of each house while they did a little "XYZ is the greatest!" song. Honestly, I found these songs terribly annoying.

i hate skit night. there really is no purpose. who cares if the chapter can dance and sing???? not me. plus i think it is rude that as the week goes on, pnms are expected to be more dressed up and the sisters are just sitting around in costumes.

we didn't have a philanthropy night when i went through rush. i would like to experience that, i think.

i was left by my rusher in one of the "popular" houses. literally, i was talking to her, she excused herself and never came back. were were all talking 1:1, but there were plenty of people around. she didn't even introduce me to someone else. i stood there for a few minutes in complete awe that this was happening. the president of the chapter came over and was like, where is so and so...lol...i told her i didn't know. she turned out to be sweet, but i dropped that house ASAP.

starting this year, our Panhel has decided to eliminate skit night from formal recruitment. They also voted to 'tone down' decorations.

I never went through formal recruitment here, so I would have liked to see how it has been done, but the older sisters say the decorations thing means they won't have to blow up 500 balloons a day, which I guess could be a good thing!

I think it's the same way most places. There are some schools where you can't ever touch a PNM, and others where you can't touch her at any round except Pref, but I think for the most part it's off limits.

What I hated about recruitment was that it took all day, but I was actually only at houses for about 2 hours a day. We had to show up about an hour before anyone actually left to go visit a house. We never just went straight from one house to another, we came back to a central location for about a half-hour. And to top it all, we had more rush groups than houses, so for 2 or 3 time slots each day each group had a 'bye' during which we had to sit in this room and do nothing. Well, we did watch Mary Kate and Ashley movies and color in coloring books and eat candy...which was fun, and I know they were trying to make it like a 'destressing' time for us, and there was nothing to do about with the schedule as it was. But man, it was boring!

Sarah

Carnation, I cut a chapter partly because of the "Sister X" thing. It was just creepy.

That's wild... I don't recall my school having any rules about touching PNMs. I guess it's so that you can't hug them?

I seem to recall shaking hands with a few sisters when I rushed and with a few PNMs when I was on the other side... but no hugs... I'm not the touchy-feely type.

Would there be an exception for people with relatives going through? I can't imagine not being allowed to hug my blood sister, cousin, etc. if she were rushing my chapter and I had the chance to talk to her.

Would there also be an exception for emergencies, or for unusual circumstances - a PNM trips and a sister catches her arm so she doesn't fall?

Hm - skit was my favorite part. It helped me see there personalities and such - which is partly why I picked DG. I went in thinking I need to find a down to earth sorority that focuses on school and sisterhood - but also knows how to have fun. DG's skit showed me EXACTLY that.

The part I hated the most was pref night. I know that should be the most important night, but I felt bad when many other girls were crying and I wasn't. It made me think that maybe they thought I didn't want to be there as bad - which wasn't true at all.

My #1 hate though was when I fell in love with *insert sorority name here* on the first day. It went beyond "what's your major" and yadda yadda yadda - we talked about things real friend stalked about. On day two, one of the girls I talked to on the first day came and said hello to me - and then the president came over and said "We've heard so many good things about you Andrea!" I was over come with joy because it made me think they really liked me - then that night they cut me. I was so confused I didn't even get upset about it. When I looked at my invitation list for the next day, I thought my eyes were fooling me that I didn't see *insert sorority name here* on it.

I figure the president was just trying to be nice, but it really does more harm than good. I mean after the 2nd day I loved this sorority. Oh well, everything happens for a reason, and I just couldn't imagine me being anything else but a Delta Gamma now.

It's supposed to be so that PNMs don't feel left out if they see other girls being hugged by a sorority member and they don't get hugged. Or, conversely, so that girls don't feel like the sorority is more likely to give them a bid if they get hugged and nobody else does.

I'm assume it wouldn't apply in emergencies. I can't imagine just letting a rushee fall down the stairs and split her head open just because it was against the rules to touch her! :eek:

I don't know if there's an exception for relatives -- I would doubt it.

And again, I'm not positive that they have this rule EVERYWHERE -- just that it exists at a number of places I'm familiar with.

I've never heard about the rule before... Probably because all of our sorority houses have these huge marbley-looking tile stairs in the entrances... and all our recruitment events take place on the second floor! We definately have to grab PNMs as they walk in or else I am sure that many of them would fall!

I don't know whether we have an actual rule about not touching PNMs. We're encouraged/expected to shake hands, but our advisors tell us to avoid touching them. I remember that being one of the things about which I was über-paranoid during my first time as a rusher. We were supposed to get our PNM at the door and lead them over to the rotation group. Mine was someone I already knew (we have winter rush) and she started to wander away, and I instinctively reached out and guided her along with me. Then I freaked out, 'cuz I remembered that we weren't supposed to touch the PNMs. "Bad touch! Bad touch!"

I think skit nights are pointless. We only have three rounds of rush, and we traded skit night for philanthropy night in 1998. Thank god.

I'm trying to think of a good way to explain the selection process to PNMs. I guess it'd be best to say, "Every chapter does it differently and the process is confidential, so I don't even know." I'd say "confidential" rather than "secret" because the latter implies exclusion, whereas the former suggests that it's to avoid hurt feelings, which is the reason that it's secret.

I don't think there's a rule against touching but we don't do it because some girls get really creeped out if you touch them. If we need to guide them somewhere, we might touch them lightly on the arm or we put our hand behind their back but don't touch them. I tend to be kinda bad about it and lightly touch their arm to sort of grab them but I haven't had anyone freak out on me yet.

Then again we had some weird sisters who are gone now who freaked out about some weird things. :confused:

I know that at Wisconsin we have the no-touch rule, at least for the first couple rounds (I can't remember about pref). When I was going through, my Rho Chi warned us that we shouldn't be offended if we try to shake the sisters hands and they don't respond, because if they touch us they get a rush infraction.

I think, but I'm not completely sure, that the rule is different at Pref. I vaguely recall shaking hands with the presidents of certain groups or girls touching my back or arm during the pref ceremony.

I have to admit that from my point of view, there are some girls who just have no conception of personal space, and it would freak me out if people who just met me were touching me too much. So I think just from a don't-scare-the-rushees standpoint, it's a good rule to have for the earlier rounds.

My roommate hated the fact that everyone hugged her during rush last year.
She is not an affectionate person at all, even with her close friends, so it really freaked her out. I don't mind in this setting if there are girls I don't know hugging me or touching my arm - I think it's a sweet gesture that can either make you feel at home, or let you know how at ease the sisters are. I do understand that some could be wierded out though.