GreekChat.com Forums

GreekChat.com Forums (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/index.php)
-   Risk Management - Hazing & etc. (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/forumdisplay.php?f=30)
-   -   advice for appealing probation / termination decision (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=144557)

amIblue? 10-31-2014 05:52 PM

Holy multiple posting, Batman!

thetalady 10-31-2014 06:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sweetheart272 (Post 2298293)
i feel it's very unfair that one incident (whether it is worthy of strict punishment or not) could mean that i couldn't even participate in alumna teas 50 years from now. do you really think i'd still be a crazy PR risk as a 70 year old lady? .... i don't think mistakes you make in college should limit you from doing things later in life as an adult.

YES YES YES the things you do in college absolutely DO limit your options and opportunities in later life! Your actions at this point in your life can easily follow you F-O-R-E-V-E-R.

All I keep seeing over & over in your many posts is ME and I, what YOU think. I guess it needs to be said more pointedly that it does not matter what YOU think is fair or unfair. Sorry, I know that you disagree, but that is life. You don't get to choose what is considered fair by other people.

Sorority membership is a privilege, both as an active and as an alumna. If your chapter has gone as far as to vote to terminate your membership, I am afraid that "the tribe has spoken."

sweetheart272 10-31-2014 07:32 PM

in reply to everyone who's posted, it has been really kind of you to offer your opinions and information.

this is a complicated situation in which i didn't have any reliable resources to turn to for advice and feedback, so i am grateful that so many of you have come forward and provided that for me.

it seems the consensus is that my odds aren't good, but i guess i'll have to wait it out and see if they will see the good in me and all i am willing to offer. i feel that my dedication, perseverance, and passion would make me a great attribute to this sorority. hopefully things will work out the way they were meant to be.

thanks again everybody, perhaps i'll keep you posted if you'd like

pinksequins 10-31-2014 08:34 PM

Do check out the possibility of early alumna status. It could be a quiet way to put the entire matter to rest. Keep that concept in your back pocket for the work world also. Many people's rewsignation is a face-saving way to avoid being fired.

als463 11-01-2014 10:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pinksequins (Post 2298330)
Do check out the possibility of early alumna status. It could be a quiet way to put the entire matter to rest. Keep that concept in your back pocket for the work world also. Many people's rewsignation is a face-saving way to avoid being fired.

I don't think early alumna status will work in this situation. I get the impression that the entire chapter does not want her there after she made a mistake. Usually, early alumna status is given to people in extreme circumstances or circumstances that are beyond their control. I know chapters that absorb local sororities and give the original members early alumna status or chapters that allow early alumna status to members in programs that go beyond 4 or 5 years. It can also depend upon a person's major and if they are in something like pre-pharmacy that, at a school near me, does not offer a B.S. but, sends a student straight to graduate school after year 2.

OP, you kind of made something that was "confidential" into something public by coming on a public site. I say this because I've watched people who are being considered for termination speak up on social media sites and further smear the name of their sisters without mentioning school or organization. Once you look at their profile, it is easy to determine what school or organization to which they belong.

AZTheta 11-01-2014 11:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sweetheart272 (Post 2298303)
thank you for this post. it's good to know that i'm not the only one in the world who's had this struggle, lol.

those first stories sounded very similar to mine, but unfortunately there wasn't an advisor in my case.

i feel like the reason i'm making such a fuss about this and having a hard time accepting accusations and consequences is mostly because of that.

had all the proceedings of my discipline followed procedure properly, been supervised by an expert/unbiased party like an advisor, and i had been explained what the issues were with valid evidence and adequate detail, it'd still suck to be in trouble, but i'd accept it because i felt like i deserved it since the policies were followed and i got punished, fair and square.

i guess its too hard for me to swallow my pride and be like "yup i was guilty of everything, totally responsible, they're totally right" when i know for a fact my case was misrepresented and included accusations of things i didn't do.

if i was guilty of something, i'd take the blame. but when you don't agree your guilty, it's hard not to fight back

No.

Just, no. You still don't get it. Now you're contradicting yourself all over the place.

Woke up this morning with a huge knot on my forehead. Realized it came from beating my head against the brick wall that is sweetheart272.

#stickaforkinmeI'mdone

sweetheart272 11-02-2014 02:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AZTheta (Post 2298369)
No.

Just, no. You still don't get it. Now you're contradicting yourself all over the place.

Woke up this morning with a huge knot on my forehead. Realized it came from beating my head against the brick wall that is sweetheart272.

#stickaforkinmeI'mdone

i apologize for having frustrated you. i'm happy for your thoughts, if that's any solace.

sorry.

sweetheart272 11-02-2014 03:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by als463 (Post 2298363)
I don't think early alumna status will work in this situation. I get the impression that the entire chapter does not want her there after she made a mistake. Usually, early alumna status is given to people in extreme circumstances or circumstances that are beyond their control. I know chapters that absorb local sororities and give the original members early alumna status or chapters that allow early alumna status to members in programs that go beyond 4 or 5 years. It can also depend upon a person's major and if they are in something like pre-pharmacy that, at a school near me, does not offer a B.S. but, sends a student straight to graduate school after year 2.

OP, you kind of made something that was "confidential" into something public by coming on a public site. I say this because I've watched people who are being considered for termination speak up on social media sites and further smear the name of their sisters without mentioning school or organization. Once you look at their profile, it is easy to determine what school or organization to which they belong.

do you feel that is the case in my situation?

i don't feel there's any identifying information anywhere, short of identifying factors like "member up for discipline" (me) and campus with non-residential sororities… which is also many.

i do realize the risks of posting on a site, however anonymously, but as i said i exhausted all other resources accessible to me and i am glad i approached this site because you all helped me gain perspective.

it was never my intention to identify anyone or anything, so i hope i've maintained anonymity as much as i have attempted to


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 06:57 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, vBulletin Solutions Inc.