The posts that I referred to were deleted by the moderators, I believe. You can see some responses from me that look a bit out of left field.

My pm box should work, but I'll check it. :)

You were right...cleaned out old messages. I'm sorry.

I honestly never saw any direct threats on that thread. I'm sorry your daughter didn't find a chapter to join, Wary. Whether or not the shenanigans on GC had anything to do with it are open for debate. I think the take home lesson is don't put stuff out there that you don't want coming back at you. I've written back and forth with Wary. I don't think she meant to be offensive with her posts, but after the fact, she realized that it wasn't the best thing to post. You live and you learn.

I didn't really put much thought/ effort into the thread that Wary started but, it's really a shame that her lack of discretion could have hurt her daughter's chances. If that's the case--shame on anyone trying to live vicariously through their child by putting her beliefs/ thoughts out in cyberspace DURING recruitment.

Like I said, I didn't really pay much attention to who said what (as I don't generally get into recruitment threads too often) but, this is another reason why people should wait until AFTER recruitment before they feel the need to post about their recruitment experience. Once again, why does someone's mother have to come on GC and post someone else's (her daughter's) recruitment story?

Wary, I know you are so proud of how your daughter has picked herself up an moved on. Sorry recruitment didn't work out for her but it sounds like she has a great start to a great second year.

There is a huge difference in warning someone about the potential for a damaged recruitment (by "mom" posting here) and going all out and completely slaying the dragon. Creating user names to post on a thread, and having those user names mean something to Wary, so Wary knows that the poster knows who her child is is beyond super creapy. I am not going to sugar coat the situation. There is something really broken about what is going on here. This site should be about individuals that if Greek, honor their vows they took to their chapter and show a bit of honor and kindness. Not Greek? Then I guess it is what it is. The people who did this know who they are. And like I said earlier, Karma is circular. Here's to a bite smack on the center of your a$$.

Wary, don't beat yourself up. I didn't see the original version of the thread that Ellebud referred to but... even if you did something that may have "leaked" your daughter's identity, you told your daughter's story with integrity and good intentions.

In contrast, if someone deliberately sabotaged your daughter's recruitment just because they could, that's horrible. You get to walk away with your head held high, knowing that you raised a wonderful young woman that any GLO would be lucky to have as a member. The perps get to live with the knowledge that many of us on GC think they are despicable. I sincerely hope they are not really sorority women.

Ummmm....the usernames you're referring to were newbies and trolls. It also doesn't take much to go on a website and find names of groups and make up usernames (TexasDarlin, etc).

They were NOT longtime posters or socks of longtime posters. Their grammar was far too atrocious. I would have fed them to my 3 headed goat by now.

I think it just goes to show that the poster who WAS nice enough to warn Wary to dial back the TMI was probably right. That is, there are WAY more people reading than there are posting.

33..normally I am in total agreement with you. But when "trolls" use names that identify a person by group or even worse by a specific name, they are socks doing it to send a message. PM Wary. You might be surprise at what was done to let her know tha she was being watched.

lane swerve/

Essentially another "PNM's/aspirant's parents on GC" theme.

/lane swerve

Why should I PM her? Who were the trolls? Texas Darling?

You should PM her because the stalking goes so much deeper than that. I don't really want to publicly say what user names were created to make their point, (I assure you that the people involved, watching this thread, know what they did) but if you really knew how relevent what names they were using were, I hope as a mod (and more so as Greek) you would be horrified at the level of "big brother" that was going on.

From what I understand, this isn't anything new on GC. It's been going on for years already.

I heard of a story of a PNM who rushed at UCF unsuccessfully thanks to her lack of discretion here. It was discovered that she had transferred to another Florida school and hoped to rush again. Even though her new school wasn't publicly disclosed, the chapters at school #2 were inundated with "No-Recs" for her and even the Greek Life advisor couldn't believe how many people didn't want this girl in their sorority. :eek:

I'm sorry that an innocent girl had to go through this heartache, I really am. Still, I don't know what I would do if I found out that being released from rush was because of what happened here.

Maybe they do, but I don't.

This whole "I know something and yooooooooou don't" isn't my style.

Spill. If not, I'm just going to assume you're full of poo.

Dr Phil this was no lane swerve. What went on here was a campaign by one or more persons to hurt someone.

Anyone with a modicum of talent or education can create a user name and dumb down their posts to conceal their identity (ies). What happened here (and since deleted) was a hate campaign against a kid via the parent.

I keep wondering why the brave people who felt so free to skewer a kid through the mother, to (according to THEIR posts) sabotage a recruitment, don't have the guts to claim it. Notice that I don't say apologize, because I don't think she/they have the guts to do that.

I doubt that she/he/they are ashamed, but karma is a bitc*;

Actually what you are saying is EXACTLY what the bogus posters did: They said that they "knew" something about someone who was going through recruitment. What did they know? They wouldn't say. What they did do (and you can read my response posts that seem out of context without their accusations) was post a quote by Wary that had NOTHING to do with recruitment or the problems that they alluded to. Then they said that they had taken care of the problem by alerting....Panhellenic, chapters, to the unstated problem. They did, according to Wary (in a pm to me) made up user names with HER daughter's name as the poster to let her know that they knew who she was.

I'll say it again, reminds me of Senator Joseph McCarthy holding up a blank piece of paper and screaming, "I have a list of commies right here!" when he didn't. But the assertions ruined lives. Happily, Wary's daughter's life isn't ruined. She's picked herself up. And sorry, I think the people or person who did this are, for lack of a more descriptive word....poo.

I apparently wasn't on when all this was going down, and the posts were deleted completely (even from the Hall of Justice broom closet) so it's really hard for me or anyone else who didn't read it live to understand what all the brouhaha is.

THIS IS WHY PEOPLE QFP AND SAVE POSTS.

This is the only "out of line" post I see.

Trust me 33Girl, it got worse. What I summarized is bland compared to what was said and how much was inferred. Another moderator read at least part of what was said. IF there is a next time, and I truly hope that there won't be a next time.....I'll QPF. Perhaps the posters got a conscience. Probably not, but hope springs......

I am the lane swerverererer. This isn't my lane and I have limited knowledge of what you all are talking about.

I didn't see everything that was deleted so I'll just speak generally. GC has stalkers, crazies, and people who need hobbies. This point cannot be driven home enough. I said in a thread a week or so ago that I don't like people being researched and called out on the Internet.

But, I agree with MysticCat in that Wary was politely warned, QFP'd, a troll showed up to try to call Wary out, and yet Wary kept going. There comes a point where people have to see the nonsense for what it is. It is unfortunate for the young lady but people (most recently, usernames that claim to be parents) really need to stop ignoring the warning signs.

/back to my lane

Wary - Good Luck to your daughter. People (like myself and Wary) come on this board for information. Some of us look to the "experts" for advice. I didnt realize the penalty if you dont take said advice but live and learn. Wary and her daughter didnt deserve this...in fact noone would. I think people forget and feel confident sitting behind a keyboard and saying whatever they want no matter who it hurts. I think it is safe to say they are nothing but a bully. Life moves on and Wary's daughter is in a great place and that is all that matters. To the Bully....I pity you.

Without going into much detail: for instance, one troll/sock posted on GC what a particular PNM was wearing to parties that day. She had no idea how some stranger/creeper knew and it was posted as if to warn her, "I'm watching you."

I was able to delete it quickly and was horrified. I mean, this is stalking.

It is stalking. No one is saying that the outcome was good. What people seem to be saying is that the outcome was rather predictable, hence the warnings.

Preaching about crazy readers, sock puppets, and trolls doesn't make any sense. There is nothing that can be done about those beyond editing and banning. What can be done is people being careful about what they divulge and heeding warnings.

I'm not even talking about the mom who was "warned". This was someone else.

GCers often ask after someone has been attacked, "Why are you upset? It's only a message board." Yep...but I and others have been the victims of people who decided to go off the boards and tried to hurt us IRL.

Only some of you know what you're talking about.

This has always been an issue on GC and other message boards. People bring real life to message boards and message boards to real life. It is crazy but the people who do that don't care how people feel about it.

Wow..just Wow..I am sickened by this!! This person or persons is just perpetuating the sterotypes of sorority girls in a very bad way. I hope whoever you are feel horrible about this..but I suspect that you have no conscience or life..maybe you need to get one!

That's just it. No one knows (without names being given) who this sock puppet or troll was that did this. Instead of making generalizations, someone should call that person out. I'd be willing to bet that 9 times out of 10, the person who did that was not a regular GC member on here. We are all too busy with our lives to go above and beyond to worry about Patty PNM and how we can ruin her recruitment experience. Actually, I take offense to those posters who want to keep coming on here saying someone is being rude, disrespectful, spiteful, etc. Don't lump me (or many of the other GC members) into that category.

Also, if someone tells you that you are giving away too much information to the point it has become easy to figure out more about you or your daughter---take the advice and step away from the keyboard. People need to start taking responsibility for their poor actions before coming on a chat forum and blaming everyone here.

You're right, no one knows who these sock puppets or trolls are. I wouldn't bet that it wasn't a GC regular because I don't know what the people behind the usernames are doing. Instead of wasting time worrying about who did it and whether they were a GC regular, I think you were right that people need to focus on the lesson to be learned.

Question: Do mods have the ability to see IP addresses? If they do, that could certainly help at least the mods identify whether the people doing these things are regular GCers or not.


This.

I'll make this even more blunt for the rest of you:

Spend less time worrying that I'll follow your daughter through recruitment, and worry more about whether I'll be able to figure out who your daughter is - and of course the stalkers are the ones who are "in the wrong" but it doesn't much matter, because you only have control over one side of the equation here.

This is yet another reason why recruitment threads are kind of an abomination on the already-blighted face of the internet - after all, it's a "yay follow along!" thing, but then, like, TOTALLY all sad-face frowny when somebody follows along TOO MUCH.

First, I'd like to go on record and say I'm no sock puppet!

Second, I completely understand that a mother wouldn't think it's THAT important to keep your daughter's identity a complete secret. It seems crazy to me that anyone uses this site as anything beyond a little information, a little entertainment. But there are a lot of psychos out there, and many of them wear Greek letters with pride. In the future, maybe pointing out that there are people who are literally, in the flesh, in real life, stalking their daughters, would turn the lightbulb on. I'm really sorry that a girl who, as far as I've been able to ascertain from this tragic thread had no punishable flaws, had to learn this the hard way. But we can be glad it wasn't a lesson learned ending in real tragedy.

No we don't. Only John can.

BOY KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT HE'S TALKING ABOUT IN SORORITY RUSH THREAD. :)

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_gwhA-RGeXE...0/s320/yay.jpg

I've been staying away from this clusterfuck as much as possible, because this is truly awful. I can't imagine why someone would want to spend their time and energy stalking Wary and her poor daughter just because they didn't like some of the posts Wary made. It's really scary to think that someone's entire rush and Greek future could be ruined because of GC. To the people who tanked Zoe's rush because of an internet conversation, shame on you. You have no right to do something like that. You must have no life.

Well, assuming that's what happened. It's also quite possible whatever/whoever has a thing against Wary and/or her daughter was annoying here but had little to no influence on her actual rush.

Stalking.

That word raises all the hair on my neck and head, and I get a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. My mouth gets dry and I tense up.

One man who stalked me is now dead. The other is on the other side of the country. As long as I live, I will continue to be hypervigilant (ask AZ-AlphaXi and AOIIAngel, they've seen me in action when I perceive danger or what I think is a threat to my security and well-being).

So once again I mention Gavin DeBecker's The Gift of Fear. It was my lifeline during those dark days.

I'm not saying that's what happened here, but if people have concerns, it's an invaluable reference on what to do, how to act, and how to survive when and if you're stalked.

I was lucky. I lived. And I have two very protective Belgian Shepherds (a Tervuren and a Groenendael) living with me; they are formidable watchers over me.

Deep peace and blessings to all.

Does anyone remember which thread had the pearl picker?:D

I wonder if Wary's daughter pledged a spirit group.

Can I just say that this thread gives me the willies? Since it was bumped I went back and re-read. As a UT alum, familiar with the campus groups and dynamics, it was chilling to read back the history and then follow along and watch the trainwreck unfold.

Yikes.

I hope Zoe ended up happy and active in whatever of UT's many orgs was a good fit.