Oh no no no. Not at all into that. And even though it might have been a faux pas to even bring up working with rats to these girls, I at least know enough to make something up as a job rather to say I worked in a morgue if that were the case.

I would love to know where you ended up

So if you could continue, like, now? :)

Haha morgue makes me think of Drop Dead Gorgeous where Kirsten Dunst's character had a job putting make up on dead people. That would be fun to explain and recruitment.

My rush crush was a mortuary science major. We had a great conversation and when I got bumped I thought my sister was going to kill me. It took her a bit to figure out why we were talking about mortuaries during RUSH. Thankfully she was a girl who was able to talk about more than her major since most girls would have been very uncomfortable by that.

So I guess I should have held off and not made my recruitment story a live one, and waited to see what the ending was.

Tonight is pref night but I got called in for a meeting with my gamma chi this afternoon and told that I was not extended an invitation to anywhere. I am completely and utterly crushed.

Sorry to report that this tale does not have a happy ending.

Did you ever read Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH when you were a kid? :)

I've been enjoying your story. Carry on!

So sorry -Feel better :(

Ditto to all of the above.
Ben and Jerry's is amazing at this time.

I will also ditto this - there is no reason to be sorry. Hurt, yes - sorry, no.

I wish you all the best and hope you can take the time to heal, then move on to other things that you enjoy.

Thanks for your support everyone. I'm just extremely disappointed because I desperately want to get involved on campus and I have now officially either not fit it or been unable to make the cut on every organization that would ever mean anything to me on my campus.

I was in your situation last year. It absolutely KILLED. I would attempt not to burst into tears when I saw a girl wearing something sorority related, but often tears did happen. I got involved with the Residence Hall Association, Relay for Life, and did a lot of Freshman classes (Freshman Seminars, Freshman Interest Groups etc.). I also took up running, and focused my attention on training for a half marathon. Personally, it did not fill the void of not being in a sorority, but it was the best I could do. If you want to PM me, you are very welcome to do that.

P.S. may I suggest Nutella?

Not to be rude, but what part of tried pretty much everything on campus isn't clear? I wish I was exgerating when I said I tried everything with the exception of groups that I obviously didn't qualify for (African American, Gay/Lesbian, etc groups) or clubs with majors totally different than my own. I did everything I could last year to fill the fact that I couldn't rush last fall, but I either didn't fit in (Cru, Intramural and club sports), they no longer exist (Hall Council), or you have to for the most part be greek to get in them (Student Government and Student Alumni Ambassadors).

the part where you say you dont "qualify" for certain groups or clubs with different interests/majors. you do know you can do stuff outside youre typical interests and major, right?

youre just going to have to try a little bit harder then to do something thats not greek life. nto being greek doesnt mean youre a social leper. most of the non-greeks i know have awesome social lives in college.

it hurts now, and youll cry. but at some point youll get tired of crying and being hurt.

Question... since I want to know what my options are. If all chapters reached quota, does that mean that they are all over total and there is no chance of open recruitment?

Total and Quota are two seperate things. Quota is a number determined by the number of girls rushing and the number of sororities. (at least on my campus) Total is the total number of girls in the chapter at a given time determined by panhellenic. You can go Quota plus additions in the case of suicides etc, and can snap bid to Quota after bid day if you don't fill Quota.

You can COB to total at any time through the year. You can only go over total if it is to fulfill quota.

Hopefully that makes sense, it's been awhile since I have had to study the greenbook and it is different on a small campus like mine was I am sure.

I've been involved in groups that I didn't exactly "qualify" for, to use your words, but these groups do have open events so you can be a peripheral member and meet people. I'm a Protestant with a Northern European background but I go to events put on by the Society of Black Engineers, faiths other than my own, Nepali night, intramurals, Latina/Latino/Multicultural Greek orgs programming, and I've been pretty active with the Gay Straight Alliance, though I am not GLBTQ or anything but me. Hell I've been invited to MECHA and I definitely don't "qualify" though at least for my campus there is a lot of openness among groups (the Greek system is a whole other story).

You don't have to join a club, you can go to events and meet people. Obviously you're upset right now, so wait a bit and go back out and see what's on campus.

We were allowed to go over total on two occassions during my four years because quota was higher than the spots we had to total since the other NPC was struggling and our campus total had remained locked for 3 years straight. So like I said Total can only be gone over in the case of a higher quota than total so it is not a total is the final number period situation.

I'm sure it's rare, and unlikely to happen on any big campus, but on our very small two NPC campus it has happened, and from talking to my little who is chapter key advisor this will most likely be the case again this year.

Sorry this went off topic a bit....

IloveSephora good luck, I know it kind of sucks right now but you are being very mature about all of this and you may still find a home in the Greek system. Being Greek is not the be all and end all though!

Yeah I realized that after I typed it, sorry I was just like wait what you mean we couldn't do that.. but we did that. *face-palm* ignore me I need more flu pills.

Me --- (Support) ---> IHeartSephora

If you had waited and not shared your story because it didn't have a "happy ending" then you wouldn't know you had fans out there. I for one am rooting for you!

My succinct advice is to try not to let opinions from people who hardly know you at all get you down.

I am sorry to hear about what happened. We all wouldve liked to hear differently, but you know, this is just how it worked out! When one door closes, another one opens, I am sure you'll get involved in a great way! Get creative! :)

The rough part about recruitment is that though it can be fun and exciting, it can be brutal too. Everyone, sororities, those who get bids, and those who dont, experiences rejection of some kind.

You should be proud of yourself, you did a very hard thing that many people are not brave enough to try, you went through recruitment, you put yourself out there, and youre still awesome you. Girls who go through recruitment - and get bids or not - are awesome, brave girls. Its a great learning experience, and you are better prepared to handle life than anyone who hasnt tried it.

Rejection happens, but people do great things in the face of it!

I would disagree with Student Alumni Ambassadors. We had one come through recruitment (so obviously she wasnt a greek SAA). They do look for/require a high gpa and involvement in other campus activities.

Have you tried Alpha Phi Omega? It is a coed community service fraternity.

IF your major doesnt have a group on campus, start one! If your hobby/interest doenst have a group on campus, start one! This will give you a group to be involved in and a guaranteed leadership position.

College campuses usually have many opportunities available for community service as well whether it be events on campus that need volunteers or volunteerism in the community. Alternative spring break is another way to do community service. YOu can also call up local charities and ask how you can help (Humane Society, Habitat for Humanity, Relay for Life, Race for the Cure, women/children's shelters, etc).

You can also apply to be an RA. I was under the impression that your campus still had residence hall councils, atleast they are all still listed on the registered student organizations webpage for every dorm, along with the National Residence Hall Honorary group. The student government website still lists residence life council as a branch of student government as well.

YOu can contact the office of student life for the most updated list of student organizations and how to start your own if you are interested.

Good luck!

I've been there. It hurts...no doubt about it. Remember that in part it is a numbers game. I have no doubt that in a normal life situation any number of the sorority women would love you, befriend you, enjoy your company. Recruitmant is a necessarily regemented process. It isn't a final assessment of you and your likeability.

It feels like every door is closed, but there are committees and volunteer opportunites everywhere. Even a part-time job can lead to a community of close friends.

Best wishes...