I was VERY fortunate that my parents and grandparents covered everything that my scholarships and grants didn't, but I still had a job through most of college because it was nice to have money I didn't have to explain or justify to anyone, and it put me well ahead of my peers for obtaining employment and other positions later. Beyond the financial aspects it also helped with time management and letters of recommendation for graduate school and work.

I'm suggesting a part-part time job, for say 10 hours a a week so she can contribute if the economy is still blah, and be an example to younger siblings. I babysat as a teenager and worked at a summer camp before college, so you can start your younger ones now, and if the money isn't needed later, BONUS.

Would it be awful to ask her to get a small part-time job on campus to help with costs? I know at Ole Miss many sorority girls have small part-time jobs to help pay for t-shirts and things like that. It's not unheard of and I don't think she would be shunned or looked down upon if she had a small job. Just an idea.

ETA:
Money was never discussed at Ole Miss either. To my knowledge it is only discussed at Orientation during the summer. The averages on the PHC Website are rather low I think too.

I'm with the members on the train leaving the station and really in agreement on a lot of members just not knowing dues.

Sure I have the break down spread sheet somewhere in my binder but I don't know it, honestly this thread reminded me I have to pay my dues for the semester and I don't even know the total amount.

I can definitely feel for the financial strain you are feeling during these tough times, but I'm not sure what the point of knowing the costs would be at this point either. Would you be advising your daughter to rank her chapters based on their costs? What happens if only the higher cost chapters invite her back and she is in love with one or more of them? Would you require her to drop out of recruitment? What an undue emotion burden to put on a woman already stressed by one of the toughest recruitments in the country.

The time to have discussed how everything would be paid for was before signing up for recruitment. I don't think having your daughter get a small job to help pay for her sorority expenses would be unreasonable, but I think her knowing that might be a possibility beforehand would have helped her weigh whether or not belonging to a sorority would be worth the extra work.

By the way, there are also other expenses to consider that wouldn't be listed on any rate sheet, no matter how inclusive. Thinks like formal dresses, non-sponsored events and trips with her sisters (ie: road trips to games, spring break), gifts for sisters, fines, donations etc. etc. can also add up. So there's really much more to consider than just the costs that have been revealed/not revealed.

Even during the best of times being Greek, especially at a school like Bama, is a luxury. You may simply need to have a frank talk with your children about the current realities of life in your family and re-evaluate whether or not anyone should be taking on the extra expense of being Greek at this point.

Wow, I must say that I am disappointed by some of the comments here. I joined the forum seeking insight and information, and feel that I am getting chastisement instead for "letting the train leave the station" without looking into this first. If the posters making these comments would look carefully at what I have posted, we DID look carefully at the costs prior to registering for recruitment. The issue is that the rush packet lists over $6K per semester as the high, whereas the websites we were looking at when she decided to go to Bama and go through rush there listed the highs per semester at more than half less than that amount.

Suggesting that we re-evaluate the expense of allowing her to go Greek is not even an option. As I said we DO have money to pay for it WITHOUT a payment plan. We are not trying to just "shop" for a deal. However, I personally think it is very irresponsible to teach a kid (or in this case a young adult) to enter into contractual obligations prior to even knowing what those obligations are - perhaps that is part of why our country is in such a mess today, due to the fact that too many people have the notion that it doesn't matter what something costs, as long as you want it badly enough. Would any of the posters here really enter into a contract on a house or a car without knowing if you have the funds to cover it?

I realize that some people have fixed incomes, are independently wealthy, etc., but think that they should respect hard working upper-middle class people that are trying to provide the best for their families without entering into massive amounts of debt in order to do so. I also am amazed that some here do not seem to fathom that we did indeed investigate the costs, but that the economic crisis facing our nation has had an effect on our income. I have long thought that everyone should have to work on straight commission for awhile, then they would appreciate the consistencies of a salaried position much more.

All that being put out into the open, I do really appreciate some of the people that have endeavored to offer insight, such as Zillini. It is not my fault, nor that of my daughter, that the information we originally had MAY HAVE BEEN erroneous. I don't know, maybe the costs went up since we first looked into this. I was just shocked that it appeared to be such a difference. For those that keep saying the highs and lows aren't that big of a difference, I still contend that more than double the cost is a big difference.

Thanks to those that offered support, encouragement, and help! To those that think she should not go Greek because we wanted to know the potential costs, well, I do not know what to say, except that I am glad you have plenty of money so that you do not ever have to ask questions such as these. :( I hope that your situation remains the same, and that you never have to be concerned about issues like this. I have hope and confidence that our economy will improve, and our situation will as well. (By the way, it's not like we are in dire straights or anything, gee . . .)

Benefits
 

Margretlee, Our daughter is currently in a New Row Sorority at Alabama. The cost for the 1st Semester of her Freshman year was about 3600.00. This included dues, fees, pictures, tee shirts, a sorority pin, a sorority trip, ect. Our daughter made the Deans List her first semester and I am convinced being in a sorority played a big part in her success. It is expensive but in our opinion joining a sorority is money well spent. I wish your daughter good luck this week.

So you think that "hard working upper-middle class people" should be respected in this regard, while equally hard working middle class or working class families should be shunted aside? Your point would have been just as, or even more valid, if you had just said "hard working families."

Awesome!

Thank you, Bear, for your insights! That is the kind of info I was interested in.

Munchkin03, I never said anything about ANYBODY being shunted aside at all. I did not realize that this was a place for critiquing other people's grammar. You have just reminded me why I seldom ever participate in forums of this nature - why must people insist on trying to stir things up by misreading and misinterpreting things??? I try to give everyone the same respect. It is unfortunate that you would purposely misdirect my point in this manner. If it is in the slightest bit offensive to anyone, then I apologize, as that wa not my intent. But I cannot but wonder how many people would have actually taken it that way without your inflammatory suggestion.

Stand down!

I wasn't offended, since I can't be bothered to be offended by something a nameless, faceless person has to say, but you have to be aware that Greek Life is socioeconomically diverse. People, regardless of their backgrounds, make a way to pay for what they really want to do. For some young women, it was getting a job, or forgoing a ski holiday, if they wanted to be in a sorority.

The fact that you are, or perceive yourself to be, upper-middle class, has absolutely nothing to do with the point at hand. Right now, a lot of families thought they'd be able to take care of dues--but scholarships and loans are much harder to come by, so family budgets and college funds are stretched to the limit. Even families of modest means, who expected to be able to take care of something like Greek Life because their kids got Bright Futures or HOPE scholarships, can't do it for myriad reasons.

Each year, I write recs for girls from my hometown--some of whom are rushing right now with your daughter at Bama. Since I don't live near my hometown anymore, I talk to them on the phone. Several of them noted the exact same thing I said above--even though their families might not be "upper middle class," their parents wanted their daughters to take full advantage of what college had to offer. But, as you know, home values plummeted, college funds tanked, and credit lines were slashed (not that I'm condoning using credit cards to pay sorority dues, but you get my point). Suddenly, that money that a family was thinking could pay for sorority dues ends up having to pay for insurance. So, yeah--it's not just the "upper middle class" that's feeling the pinch of this here Great Recession!

I think that your comment just may have seemed to be a sweeping one, rather than one that referred to your own circumstances, which is what I think you intended.

Don't fret about it.

ETA: in a somewhat related note, I really do hope that girls and their families thing about what the financial obligations are before they get initiated. I've known a couple of girls who dropped out because they decided in the hierarchy of expenses, it wasn't "worth it." The chapter will budget based on the number of members, and when you drop from active status before you graduate in all but the most dire circumstances, you are hurting the chapter and bailing on what you should see as an obligation. Sorority membership isn't designed to be the equivalent of a gym membership or something.

OP, I definitely understand where you're coming from, and I think it's great how supportive you are of your daughter going greek despite the cost. When I entered college in 2006, my parents had enough money in stocks to pay for 4 years of college and few years of grad school for both my sister and I. Even though I received some financial aid, Hopkins is a pretty pricey school. Today, their financial situation is at a point where they can only pay for less than one year of college tuition for one of us. We're taking out loans, getting a bit more financial aid and making it work, but it's not easy.

As for being Greek - they were never terribly supportive of my going greek. But while they were happy to help me out with dues for the first few semesters, dues are now entirely my responsibility because they have become a luxury. We have had a few girls leave the chapter or depledge because of financial issues, and it breaks my heart. But these are the times we live in - and our dues are FAR less than Alabama's. We don't have houses, and at their highest (as a new member) my dues were ~$550. So, I work 40 hours a week in the summer and 20 hours a week during the year to afford my dues and the optional extras like t-shirt orders, dresses for formals, gifts for Littles and Little-Littles, etc.

My point is, I don't think it's at all unreasonable to expect your daughter to work a part-time job to help cover her dues, especially if she ends up in one of the more expensive sororities. At least, I would expect her to cover extra sorority-related expenses. Obviously it's your family's decision, but if I were you I would tell her that you'll be happy to pay the average cost listed on the website (since that's what you budgeted for), and have her make up the difference if it's going to be more expensive. It probably would have been better to have this discussion earlier, but if you didn't have that information until now, that's not really your fault.

Margretlee - as a mom I understand your questions and concerns, I don't think you are out of line in the least for having those questions and hoping someone here could help you. Good luck to your girl, please stay with us and let us know how it goes!

I think most people are aware of the economic crisis you don't need to tell us about it. I know how it's effected me and ability to pay for my education. I make choices.

Honestly you said you investigated and the highest number was 6K go with that then the worst that could happen is you spend less. If it's really a concern like make or break on joining you could of called Panhel and inquired for more info before entering into recruitment.

Oh and you referring to the fact you can afford it WITHOUT a payment plan on multiple occasions makes you seem kind of snobby when in the next paragraph you're telling people to take head of the economic crisis.

How on earth a simple inquiry about potential prices turned into this is unfathomable to me. If I made comments about my personal situation, it was for clarification in response to someone else's comments. I said that we had set aside money because people suggested payment plans and such, not because I am a snob. I referred to the economic crisis because some thought we did not prepare or investigate in advance. Most of my remarks after my initial inquiry were in an effort to explain why I was asking about costs. I really was not seeking out opinions about whether or not my daughter should rush, what personal financial choices my family should make, etc., but thanks for the input. I really just wanted to know if anyone here knew about which ones fell into the upper range. I was also wondering if anyone knew why the discrepancies in the prices found online at Bama's websites. I think it's time for me to bow out of this converstaion before it gets out of hand. I mean, really, "I think most people are aware of the economic crisis you don't need to tell us about it."?That is so rude. Yes, most people are aware of the crisis, but no one here has any idea how it has affected me and my family without my informing them of it. Honestly, is all the negativity helping anything at all? Why not just say that you have no idea what the highest cost sororities at Bama are, or say nothing at all???

At least I do not have listed under my hobbies" Making fun of trashy, pretentious people", as Munchkin03 does. For heaven's sake. Yes I am "nameless and faceless" but so are you, Munchkin. I felt anonymnity was in order since it is the middle of the recruitment process, and it is obvious some people on here are involved in that process.

I hold no ill will, but respectfully ask that you please refrain from the rudeness. Isn't that one of the first rules in a sorority - to treat people with respect???

Pardon me for jumping in, but I think the questions have been asked and answered.

*Edit* I can't type as fast as KSUViolet. :)

I think the "upper middle class" thing is what stuck in people's craws. You didn't need to throw your status (or what you perceive to be your status) in there - it's tacky.

The fact of the matter is - your daughter is looking for a lifetime home, not a sweater. You can't comparison shop in a bloodless sort of fashion. If the highest figure you have seen anywhere is $6000+, I would go with that and if you can't afford it, your daughter either needs to get a job or drop out of rush.

If this is the first time pamphlets were passed out at Bama, I would wager some of the groups simply forgot them - it's easy to forget your head in rush craziness. To assume that it's a don't ask don't tell or that they don't want members who aren't rich is being just as rude to those groups as you are accusing people of being to you.

Rude? You want rude? I'm taking bets on how long it will take for mom to come back to complain how those snobby high priced old row houses cut the salesman's daughter.

I think you received very good and polite answers to your questions that also took your daughter's happiness into consideration.

You know, I love being Greek but I would have not only survived but thrived without it. I can't believe how many people now think it's some sort of right to go Greek, no matter what their current circumstances.

I felt the need to use this, again.

http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a1...h/how_rude.jpg

In my personal opinion, OP has been the only poster who has been rude in this thread so far. Many of us have dealt with balancing finances while in college. The OP asked a question and involved her family's personal situation, and we gave her the best advice we could based on the information provided. If that's not good enough, well, you got what you paid for it - it is free. There's no reason to get all up in arms. This was a pretty open and honest and thoughtful thread. There's no reason for OP to insult the members of GC and complain about the reactions given. They were very honest and up front.



Now I will go wait for the flounce to be followed up by a return visit after daughter goes through cuts.

I can understand that wanting to know what to expect when it comes to dues is important. I'm sure most of us will agree that it is important to find out, especially before joining a sorority, no matter which college you attend. However, like many other posters have said previously, set your budget high because now that she is going through recruitment, there is no way to know which sorority she is going to join if one at all. If she winds up getting a bid to a sorority that is less expensive then that's great. I hope your daughter finds her home in any one of the great sororities at Alabama.

Wow. I haven't updated my profile in about 5 years; even then, it was an inside joke between me and people who rarely post on GC anymore.

I'm not being rude at all--if you read my second post, you'll see where I explained that it's not just "upper middle class" people feeling the brunt of this recession and having to make a decision between paying sorority dues and paying for books.

In before the flounce and lock!

off topic: my sister was a Phi Mu at Ole Miss! /backontopic

To the original poster: I can give you the costs of one of the houses that is old row. She lived in the house last year and this year so my comments are based on the actual costs we have paid. Nat. Dues, Local Dues, Housing, Meal Plan, $200 in her purchase account = $3400/semester. We have found that to be much cheaper that when she lived in Campus Housing.

I think I, and maybe some other gcers, were confused about what the intent of the original question was being used for. Was it for budgeting purposes or was it for mom to tell daughter "you need to rank XYZ and ABC lower because they cost too much." Which looks from the outside like sorority shopping based on cost. Also, I think posters were also concerned that should daughter accept a bid and then drop out because of finances, she may have taken the spot of someone who could afford it and was possibly left bidless.

To be honest, when I went through recruitment I know the costs were told to me in some parties, but probably if you asked me right after the party I wouldn't have remembered. As an 18 yr old I was far too concerned with making a good impression and learning about the sororities.

I think that this is a good thread for any panhellenic to see in this type of economy if they need to inform parents of correct costs prior to recruitment begining.

I definitely agree with your last statement! Costs were not discussed during my recuitment, and at school such as Bama (as with mine) it's considered taboo to ask about costs during rush parties. Unfortunately, it's just not something that you do.

When I read the initial poster's thoughts, I felt she wanted to know total costs of each organization as she would be paying the bill. She appeared to me as if she was doing her research beforehand and felt what she was finding were extreme costs from low to high. I applaud her for being concerned and wanting to be ready to fulfill a contractual obligation. She is wise to be concerned and I wish many more people would be like that. I have witnessed so many poor instances when girls/moms/dads should have done more research. When people are not well informed it does hurt more than just that one member. It is a problem for the whole organization.

ITA with MaggieXi that panhellenic should see a thread like this. I feel in a good or bad economy people should be well informed. Of course, you can't account for every single penny that will be spent, but you can give a very solid figure for every organization based on the prior year. It can and should be made available for each group. It should be posted or readily available if anyone needs to reference it.

At the very least, maybe we can learn from this thread.

I can understand how the costs would be a concern. However, this question has been answered and people have even shared their own personal circumstances. Littleowl's situation is a great example of how our older children can respond in an adult manner to changing circumstances. (Littleowl- your parents have raised a smart girl!)

The poster from Bama who posted the price of approx. $3500.00 sounds quite realistic. This is what we paid (for living in the house) at a major university in neighboring Florida.

I can understand how you would be apprehensive about calling the Greek Life office and asking in the middle of rush. However, in this economy I don't think you would be the only one.

For heaven's sake, why? I don't think they're going to notify the sororities that Zsa Zsa's mom called about costs and they're going to freak out and cut her. I'm sure that the fwap fwap is in the air and this would be one of the LESS annoying calls they would get.

if the op wanted to phone panhellenic, she wouldn't necessarily have to identify herself(or her daughter) by name.

however, i have a feeling that panhellenic would say that that information will come from the chapters. it is certainly worth a try though.

It did seem to me also that if she found out that certain ones were much higher, she would have instructed her daughter to drop them. Perhaps that was not her intent but it came across that way to me - hence the "train has left the station" comment. I can't imagine a parent doing something like that to her child int he middle of recruitment.

She also asked what she would tell the 2 younger sisters when their turns come if they could not afford a group as expensive as their sister's. I don't feel we're qualified to answer that. We don't know the other girls and what they can handle,etc. And they may decide not to go thru recruitment when their turns come. It just seems to me that all this should have been decided before the young lady signed up for recruitment....not while she's in the midst of it.

hijack/

I know in my org (and others that are similar), dues will change from year to year, but not by much ($10-50 tops). Do your (NPC) change dramatically from year to year (I'm sure this is a "varies by org" topic, but just in general)?

Also, couldn't someone ask a current member how much they were charged in dues (ex. I walk up to a KD active and ask if she could let me know approximately how much dues are)? Or is that taboo?

If this has already been answered, sorry. I don't want to go back and read through this thread.

/hijack

National ASA (or KD or KKG or whoever) dues are the same at every chapter - the difference here is in the local chapter's dues and housing costs. There are probably NPC groups whose national dues are higher than other groups, and who have different sorts of payment plans, but that's not really what's creating the issue here.

I understand the bolded part. Would local dues vary THAT much from year to year? Would parlor fees, for example, go from $2000 (random number) to $4000 in one year?

I'm not even sure if all orgs are required to report their specific costs to Panhellenic. So I doubt they'll have any more accurate info than is available on the website.

On the University of Alabama campus there is one accounting firm that handles almost all of the sororities and fraternities, Greek Resources. The OP or any other interested party should call them. While I doubt they will give out GLO names, they will be able to provide far more accurate info about costs than probably any of us. Their contact info is even listed on the UA Greek Life website "Parent's Guide".

This could happen if a new house was built or if a new suite was opened or something. Or if major renovations were planned.

Makes sense. Thanks.

/hijack

The apprehension lies in the perceived attitude, "If you have to ask you can't afford it and we'll cut you because we think you can't afford it". Plus, many of the actives don't actually know how much their dues are because mommy and daddy foot the bill.

I don't know why each chapter doesn't fully disclose their dues and what those dues cover (whether they are all inclusive or what they include/what is extra). Without disclosure of finances before recruitment, I am sure every chapter gets new members who end up dropping because they decide they can't afford it. That hurts the chapters too.

I'm suspicious that the OP has so blatantly instructed GCers to "either tell me what XYZ's dues are or don't post" and that she "would like her daughter to avoid the high ones". She has the high and low figures, so why does she need to know which is which unless she plans on telling her daughter not to pledge the high ones?