Hey, hijackers, stuff a nut in it! :rolleyes:
http://www.storesonline.com/images/c....width.max=400

And have a good Turkey day! (even if it includes cheez whiz, I suppose...)

You are unbeleivable for someone who is supposed to be an ASA and a Greek!

You should belong to a Sororority that have a snake as its mascot.

Your tail rattles and your fangs show!

God, I love chating with you! You are a waste of a good body!

F U and F O!:rolleyes:


You really Cannot Understand Normal Thinking can you?

Now, back to the original post and thought train!:D

Look guys, I got Earpus really pissed off this time.:D

Irony.

Are you suggesting that Sigma Kappa is a poor sorority to be a member of? Fangs are quite useful. We get ours at initiation.

Wait, why are you posting here again? Don't you have a happy fun place to play?

Oh right, you're a hypocrite.

To All Our Family and Friends,

Just a note to let you know we are hoping to see you Thanksgiving, however, Martha Stewart will not be dining with us this year. I thought it best to give you advance warning. Since Ms. Stewart won't be coming, I've made a few small changes: Our sidewalk will not be lined with homemade, paper bag luminaries. After a trial run, it was decided that no matter how cleverly done, rows of flaming lunch sacks do not have the desired welcoming effect.

Once inside our home, you will notice that the entry hall is not decorated with the swags of Indian corn and fall foliage I had planned to make. Instead, I've gotten the kids involved in the decorating by having them track in colorful autumn leaves from the front yard. (The mud was their idea.)

The dining table will not be covered with expensive linens, fancy china, or crystal goblets. If possible, we will use dishes that match and everyone will get a fork. Since this IS Thanksgiving, we will refrain from using the plastic Peter Rabbit plate and the Santa napkins from last Christmas.

Our centerpiece will not be the tower of fresh fruit and flowers that I had hoped for. Instead we will be displaying a hedgehog-like decoration hand-crafted from the finest construction paper. The artist assures me it is a turkey.

We will be dining fashionably late. The children will entertain you while you wait. I'm sure they will be happy to share every choice comment I have made regarding Thanksgiving, pilgrims and the turkey hot line. Please remember that most of these comments were made at 5:00 a.m. upon discovering that the turkey was still hard enough to cut diamonds.

As accompaniment to the children's recital, I will play a recording of tribal drumming. If the children should mention that I don't own a recording of tribal drumming, or that tribal drumming sounds suspiciously like a frozen turkey in a clothes dryer, ignore them. They are lying.

We toyed with the idea of ringing a dainty silver bell to announce the start of our feast. In the end, we chose to keep our traditional method. We've also decided against a formal seating arrangement with engraved place cards. When the smoke alarm sounds, please gather around the table and sit where you like. In the spirit of harmony, we will ask the children to sit at a separate table. In a separate room. Next door.

Now, I know you have all seen the Norman Rockwell version of Dad carving a turkey in front of a crowd of appreciative on-lookers. This will not be happening at our dinner table. For safety reasons, the turkey will be carved in a private ceremony. I stress "private" meaning: Do not, under any circumstances, enter the kitchen to laugh at me. Do not send small, unsuspecting children to check on my progress. I have an electric knife. The turkey is unarmed.
It stands to reason that I will eventually win. When I do, we will eat.

I would like to take this opportunity to remind my young diners that "passing the rolls" is not a football play. Nor is it a request to bean your sister in the head with warm tasty wad of dough.

Oh, and one last reminder for the adults: For the duration of the meal, and especially while in the presence of young diners, we will refer to the giblet gravy by its lesser-known name: Cheese Sauce. If a young diner questions you regarding the origins or type of Cheese Sauce, plead ignorance. Cheese Sauce stains everything.

Before I forget, there is one last change. Instead of offering a choice of 12 different scrumptious desserts, we will be serving the traditional pumpkin pie, garnished with whipped cream and small fingerprints. You will still have a choice; take it or leave it.

I hope you aren't too disappointed that Martha Stewart will not be dining with us this Thanksgiving and...She probably won't come next year either.

Remember my friends, the original Thanksgiving Tradition is Thanking God for our country where we can freely practice "Worshiping our God" as we choose. May God leave stains of love and fellowship on your tablecloth, wherever you are this Thanksgiving and through out the year!

^^^This is hilarious! The turkey in the dryer part CRACKED ME UP. Happy Turkey Day!!

Not at all, I just take the post as something ignorant as usual.

Maybe you will answer the qestion about calories and my gooey buns some time soon!

Drolefille
really?;)

What was the "qestion"?

He's offended that I said his Gooey Buns have 5000 calories, as opposed to the 1100 in a Thanksgiving meal. Apparently, he doesn't understand that 5000 was a random number, and I'm not going to take the time to figure out how many calories CheezWhiz, balogna, hotdogs, relish, mayo, etc equal, but I'm pretty confident that it's more than turkey with all the trimmings.

LOL like none of the other ingredients dont screw up the taste of gooey buns...