When you ask about finances (although, I would hold off until after the treasurer does her presentation), it doesn't hurt to mention that either you have a part-time job that will help you cover your dues, or if mommy & daddy are paying "I'm so glad that my parents support my joining a sorority" (I would use "support" instead of "are paying for"). Honestly, there are groups out there that will cut girls if they think they won't be able to pay for dues. It does them no good to offer a girl a spot, and then have her drop because she realizes that she can't afford it.

I ditto that, Alpha Frog. Nothing turns a rusher off more than to hear a rushee ask lots of questions about money. In the south, it's often considered rude to bring up money in polite conversation. Though we've had many an argument about archaic ideas of good manners, lots of questions about money makes people think that you have a money problem. No one wants to ask a girl to join just to have to beg her to pay dues later. Know before you go into rush how much it will cost on your campus. Panhellenic should have those figures. Automatically expect to pay a bit more for extras....that being said, these things are EXTRA...if you can't afford it, don't buy it!

Nothing kills me more than a girl with 50 sewn letter shirts, 3 totebags, etc who can't pay her dues.:rolleyes:

Yeah, I didn't think asking about finances would be appropriate during rush until they told us. :) I'm just wondering, do we have to pay extra for all of our shirts and stuff we get, or are they included in the dues you pay? Or is it different for every sorority?

I think most chapters would have t-shirts as extras. Dues are already high enough paying for national fees, parlor fees, panhellenic fees, etc. Parties and shirts are usually in addition to dues. If a chapter has them included in dues, I'd expect their dues to be significantly higher than those who don't have these items included.

...Really? We pay about 260/semester and all our Tshirts are included, as well as everything else.

Wow...that's really nice! Our dues were a little higher, I think, but we had to buy all of our t-shirts. In a way I like it that way...if I didn't like a shirt, I didn't buy it. If it's included in dues then you are obligated to buy. Anyway, all of the chapters on campus ran that way. Is your chapter different than the other groups on campus or is that the norm for you area?

What good is it to get a new girl who has to drop because she can't afford it and didn't know? I think it's pretty bad if she can't ask how much dues are a semester and are extras included...that's one pretty basic question. Panhellenic figures are not guaranteed to be updated and accurate at all times.

That IS archaic if she can't ask that much without being cut. I'm very much southern myself but do not see the offense in asking a very important question like that.

It probably is a rule, but maybe it doesn't have to be presented so explicitly. Here I am not sure if we HAVE to include it or not, but every sorority had the cost of dues and initiation fees on a tri fold board or something during Philanthropy or Theme night. Most PNMs probably get to see these figures. I did, but I was looking closely at everything. Some people might become nervous and not notice all small detail. If PNMs ask at our school we tell them. I haven't HEARD of anyone getting cut because they asked about finances. All I know for sure is that my chapter hasn't done that since I've been here. I doubt any of the five would cut a girl for asking, though. (Then again, the range for dues is from $250 to around $400 a semester, so many girls can afford it if they have a job. They just might not be able to buy t-shirts or something.)

I think they way y'all do it is a great idea. I don't really see ettiquette as an excuse, personally. I love being southern but by no means do I think that "southerness" shouldn't move to keep up with the times. Of course it does a chapter no good to pledge a girl who will never be able to keep up with her dues, but on the other hand assuming that she won't be able to based on questions about finances is very short sighted! I guess that's one of the downfalls of NPC Recruitment.

I didn't mean that they shouldn't ask about money at all. Of course they should if they have concerns. But they shouldn't ask EVERY sister they talk to, or question after question about it.

If the sorority hasn't mentioned it by the party BEFORE prefs (you don't really want to discuss $$ at prefs, it kinda ruins it), then ask about it. Good way to phrase the question: "How much would you say your average dues are for a new member, and what all does that cover?" AND if you need to, you can follow that up with: "Does your treasurer have a payment plan?". But, then leave it at that. Don't go on and on about how payments are broken up, and what extras there are (because extras are EXTRAS), and what if I can't pay this semester, etc.

I didn't say ask a lot of questions either and provided a very similar example to yours. I don't think ettiquette should eliminate such an important question.

Notice I did say LOTS of questions. The occasional well worded question about finances is not a problem, but like other people have mentioned, if you ask every sister who rushes you a question about money, at the meeting that night, you may be remembered as the girl who won't be able to afford dues. This may not be correct, but it's an assumption I'm sure a lot of people will make when cuts are made for less!

Is it okay if I ask a question that might be stepping over the line, such as:

Interviewer: Why did you want to join ABC sorority?

Me: I see a lot of potential for leadership opportunities in philanthropy and other areas.

Interviewer: Give an example of the other areas where you see leadership opportunities

Me: Well, when I rushed last year, I met a lot of girls who mentioned that they were Christian or Catholic, and as a member of Intervarsity (A christian group on campus), I was hoping that, if I have enough support, I could start a Bible study with the girls. I also see this as a potential opportunity to create an even tighter bond within the sisterhood