"It's on like a chicken bone, lildaddy! I been cravin' them pig ears fa a grip now. Let's be out, a nigga honegary (hungary) like two fat chicks who ain't ate all day!" And the two of them pimped off to Pookey's '77 mustard yellow Cadillac with olive green crush velvet seats, diamond in the back, suroof top, dippin from the scene with a gangsta lean.....oooo ooooooooooooo

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Be true to yourself and the rest will fall into place......

so they were hoverin' down international blvd and spotted a lounge called apartment c...(bumpin' to...dun, dun, dun, dun, dun...dun, dun, dun, dun, dun)..."errrrrt...SHALAMAR!!! drop me off right here..."



[This message has been edited by CelestialBlu1 (edited July 27, 2001).]

When Pookie and Shawty Red entered the small and smelly apartment, Big Mama was nowhere to be seen. Everything looked normal: the food was on the table and there was even a big peach cobbler there for dessert--still hot from the oven.

"Pookie, I know you ain't trying that tired mess again, ordering out from "Lil' Man's Soul Food and Thangs", tryna trick me into coming up here by myself! Cuz you already know--I DON'T LIKE YOU LIKE THAT!!" screamed Shawty.

Pookie grabbed Shawty by the arm, and shook her as he spoke in a low menacing voice,
"Gurl, you betta kill all that loud $#@!,
'fore I gets pissed! I ain't gots ta lie ta gets mine, believe that. She WAS here when I left, and she said that she wanted ta holla atcha. We needs ta find her, 'cuz I gots other thangs to do than mess around with you!"

Big Mama was at the apartment but she decided to head over to Nettie and EunnieBelle's house, which was across town near the one club that didn't play all that noisy hip-hop and thug love music the kids listen to. No sir, this place was still dedicated to that down home blues and folks from miles around hit it up every Friday and Saturday to drink, talk and dance.

Nettie and EunnieBelle had some kin coming back home from Chicago and she wanted to be there to welcome them back. They left Jasper, Mississippi during the great migration to the North. In fact, it has been said that most African American's in Chicago have family still in sleepy little Mississippi towns like Jasper.

Big Mama knew they would return trying to "floss" their jewels, big city jobs, and the latest big city fashions. But Big Mama didn't care 'bout none of that. She only wanted one thing from the visitors. She wanted...

to find the key to the safety deposit box her beloved husband had left her in passing...but which had mysteriously disappeared during the last family function...

[This message has been edited by celestial_blues (edited August 02, 2001).]

... which was ten year ago. Big Mama had an idea who had the keys but she wanted to look the culprit in the eye. no he said, she said mess. Big Mama was prepared to confront the lower-than-a-snake relative. She got inside her black on black esplanade that her great grandson, anthony henderson (cornerback for the jacksonville jaguars) bought her to thank his "big mama" for rearing him during his "formative" years.

Pulling up into the driveway, Big Mama noticed the mustard yellow cadillac and said a silent prayer ...

"lawd...please don't let that be that wayward chile lil' miss thang...and her side kick pookey..."

so, Big Momma got of the truck and walked into her home to greet her long awaited guests. To no surprise she looked up and saw Lil' Miss thang and Pookey standing in the living room. Big Momma shriek, "Laawwwddd, I do declare! looka here looka here. "Isn't this a pleasant surprise". "Where have yall been hidin yow selves?"

sucked her teeth. then she said "Gul shut up! You always ranting bout watcha gone do. sit down here and eat some of this food I done spend half te day makin" All of a sudden there was a loud crash on the back porch...............

Big Mama ran to the back dow and removed the broom. She looked out to see what was all the comotion 'bout. It was just Big Percy and lil Cmore fighting over who ate the last chicken wing. She yelled out, "what I tell y'all about bringing that stuf to my back dow, if I got to come out there, y'all goin wish I hadn'T"......

BIG Percy and lil Cmore started blaming one another ova and ova again about who started it. So Big Moma told dem to hush dat rackit up, and git on in da house befo she crack bof of they skull to the fat meat. So they both went in the house....

...and sat down on the plastic covered couch across from Pookie and Shawty Red. At once they began to sneak glances out of the corner of their eyes, whisper, and snicker. Pookie shot them a highly poisonous look while Shawty sucked her teeth loudly and rolled her eyes.

Big Momma was confused about all the "attitude" on display, so she just came right out and asked, "Ok, little men--what GROWN FOLKS BUSINESS y'all done got y'all's noses stuck into now?"