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-   -   rushing again (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=77622)

Rudey 04-24-2006 02:22 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by aopirose
That's what I think happened.

Rudey, I hear what you are saying and I agree. However, in the OP, it was stated almost ad nauseam about how much she hated the chapter and most of the girls. IIRC, she said that she was supposed to be in a better house anyway.

What's wrong with that?

The reality is this. Not all fraternities and sororities are the same. Some are bookish and intelligent, some are meatheads or pretty girls, some are rich and some are poor, some are good and some are bad and some are better.

And for whatever reason, someone may not fall in line with the rest of the house.

That's natural. There isn't any reason to sugarcoat it right? If someone doesn't want to answer her, they can just move on and if they want to tell her about their experience or just listen, they can do that too :) That of course isn't reality as we've seen.

-Rudey

utealum 04-24-2006 02:24 PM

Well, my guess is that if she was supposed to be in a better house, she would have gotten a bid from that house.

MTSUGURL 04-24-2006 02:28 PM

You could rush a local, but honestly, red flags would go up when girls came to our recruitment and they had quit another sorority after being intiated so recently. It's one thing if there are unethical things going on that make you feel that you have to quit, quite another to decide so quickly that you don't like it. Newsflash - when you join a sorority, you have responsibilities - one of which is reaching out to your sisters in friendship, and another is throwing yourself in wholeheartedly. If you can't do it in one, you can't do it in another.

Rudey 04-24-2006 02:28 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by utealum
Well, my guess is that if she was supposed to be in a better house, she would have gotten a bid from that house.
Really? I've seen pictures of groups of gorgeous girls and then right there in the corner is a girl who is anything but.

I guess we don't know and it's not for us to judge that - plus it's not what the thread is about.

-Rudey

PM_Mama00 04-24-2006 02:41 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Rudey
What's wrong with that?

The reality is this. Not all fraternities and sororities are the same. Some are bookish and intelligent, some are meatheads or pretty girls, some are rich and some are poor, some are good and some are bad and some are better.

And for whatever reason, someone may not fall in line with the rest of the house.

That's natural. There isn't any reason to sugarcoat it right? If someone doesn't want to answer her, they can just move on and if they want to tell her about their experience or just listen, they can do that too :) That of course isn't reality as we've seen.

-Rudey

Ok think of it this way. How would you feel if one of your brothers were on these boards... a chapter brother... and was saying how horrible your chapter was and how much he hates your house/chapter and woah is me what should I do?

aopirose 04-24-2006 02:49 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Rudey
What's wrong with that?
There isn't anything wrong with that. Everyone wants to be in a group where they feel comfortable. Many people, including myself, gave her great advice regarding the situation as she laid it out in the original thread. No one sugarcoated or coddled and some added their own stories. Life is way too short to be miserable. That's why I suggested originally, that if she can't make it work then she should walk.

Rudey 04-24-2006 03:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by PM_Mama00
Ok think of it this way. How would you feel if one of your brothers were on these boards... a chapter brother... and was saying how horrible your chapter was and how much he hates your house/chapter and woah is me what should I do?
But I'm not in her sorority and she hasn't come on here saying what sorority that is or what chapter.

We've all had members that weren't happy. It's just the way it is.

-Rudey

PhoenixAzul 04-24-2006 04:03 PM

Let's be careful with the "rush a local" advice. Locals still have selective membership, which often includes hesitation to initiate initiates of another organization. (without too much detail...my own sorority would probably not pledge/initiate a member of another sorority, however the situation hasn't presented itself in recent time).

This isn't a dig against anyone in this thread, honestly. I just don't want this girl to get the idea that locals will immediately accept her. I know that the advice was meant in the most constructive way, I just worry that it will get read as "rush a local/service, theyre almost as good as an NPC/NIC". Just as a note that fraternal organizations, service, local, and national, all have selection and requirements, and are all equally awesome :)

SigmaPezY60 04-24-2006 04:20 PM

I agree with my fellow Local Soror. I know that my sorority would be very hesitant for the simple fact that being a part of a sorority is not like a club that you can quit and just join another one if you don't like it.

Before initiation you have a new member/associate member/ etc process. During this process you get to know the traditions of your chapter and sisterhood. You learn the history, participate in activities with the members. If you don't feel that you belong, then you have the option to quit pledging before initiation. Sure it is totally different when you are a member, because you are even more involved....but in life you make decisions make sure you chose wisely.

If you were just initiated, then I say don't quit. Obviously you accepted your bid for a reason, and continued with the new member process for a reason as well. If you have concerns about your sorority not being what you thought it was during the NM process-talk to your sisters about how you can change that. Chances are if this is the case it will keep happening and weaken your chapter.

Don't quit...just get involved and take pride in your decisions-because you wouldn't have decided to join if you didn't want to be part of the organization.

FSUZeta 04-24-2006 06:16 PM

check your pm


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