GreekChat.com Forums - Movie Coming Soon: Diary of A Tired Black Man

GreekChat.com Forums (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/index.php)

- Alpha Kappa Alpha (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/forumdisplay.php?f=47)

- - Movie Coming Soon: Diary of A Tired Black Man (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=77477)

Quote:

Originally posted by The Cushite
The Clip was interesting. But it shows the all too overplayed scenario of black men and black women in dysfunctional relationships. My wife is trying to write a novel about this, but she is finding from publishing companies that people don't want to delve into the complexities of a 21st century adult love affair between a black man and a black woman. All they want is the dirt, the name calling, the cheating, the rampant pain and lies. My wife, an English Professor, just calls it "Low culture" (A literary concept that divides academic fiction or "High culture" from popular fiction or "low Culture"). The high culture literature would be subject for academic critique and address themes that would stand up to literary critique. Think about Toni Morrison or Alice Walker for "High Culture" writers and Eric Jerome Dickey or Terry McMillan for "Low Culture" writers. This isn't to say that Low Culture isn't or can't be good literature, but it is written for a broader audience, an audience that wouldn't appreciate certain literary devices that High culture writers would employ.

I said all that to say that this clip seemed to attract a "low culture" perspective on the issue. Just because the brother showed up with a white women, the black women labeled him "weak". He only defended himself by looking at material things he bought for the ex, as if this disproved her assertion of his "weakness". He then states that he couldn't deal with the "drama" that came from her every night (a stereotype of black women, that they are immasculating). Couple that with all of the profanity and you appeal to a wider audience, and an audience that is more stimulated by titilation and discord rather than keen insight and critique. I think the issue of inter-racial dating needs to get beyond the surface issues and look at the complexities of history, economics, politics, religion, sex, "the whole 9" as Prof. X (R.I.P.) of the X Clan would say.

Interacial dating is so much more than shallow black men, "weak" white women, and Jealous black women. And no, brothers, you are not let off the hook because you feel like it is "easier" to date a white woman. Strong black communities are started with strong black families. Strong black families are started with strong black romantic relationships. What is keeping you from that strong black woman, strong black man!!??!! What is keeping you, strong black woman, from that strong black man!!??!!

Blackwatch!!!!!!

I agree with this. I am tired of seeing movies that highlight dysfunction in the black community and do not address any of the underlying causes for these issues nor do they highlight any of the many wonderful aspects of the black family. From what I saw in the clip the characters seem to be very superficial and stereotypical, and I will not be wasting my money on this.

Blackwatch, well said and right on target!

Quote:

Bruh, on the surface I appreciate and believe it or not, even agree with much of what you say. And I concede that perhaps the content comes off as stereotypical, or "low culture" as you put it. But frankly, I personally am glad that there is even a movie that addresses what I am feeling about today's black women to a T, be it high culture, low culture, or no culture at all.

Because all too often, I am forced to see movies that are presented only from the women's side, or with the tired theme of men pursuing IMHO undesireable/unsuitable black women (those men I call "manginas"--a hybrid of "man" and "vagina"; you get the general idea of where I am going with this).

Too many movies ignore the "Average Joe" brother and his attempts to land a woman with genuine intentions of seeking love and companionship, often resulting the the brother being slighted by the "sista" for shallow, selfish reasons. And the only rationale people can provide for this was that "the brother must've been a weak-@** man" What the fuss?

Now there is a movie that addresses "the other side of the fence" and folk automatically want to dismiss it as "low-brow drama". I look at it this way, someone took the initiative to say that stuff like this happens to men and it needs to be portrayed on the silver screen.

Slightly off topic: Last year, there was a Direct-to-DVD movie called "Baby's Momma Drama", about four men (two black, one white, one Latino) and their issues with dealing with child support payments and the money-hungry malicious women they were dealing with. Sure it was "low culture". But IMHO it was on point because stuff like this was happening every day and no one bothered to portray it "like it is".

AFAIC, I am just grateful that there are more movies being presented from the "average black man's" point of view, rather than the women's or the "super Negro brother's" point of view. And frankly, in that regard, I don't give two snots about the high-culture/low-culture stuff.

Just to add with regards to that "inter-racial" dating stuff: I don't think of what will be happening to average brothers as inter-racial dating, but inter-CULTURAL dating, which is why I wish they had the brother date a foreign woman, even an African or a Carribean woman would have made the same social impact as hime dating a white woman.

Re: Re: Interesting

Quote:

Originally posted by Rain Man
Bruh, on the surface I appreciate and believe it or not, even agree with much of what you say. And I concede that perhaps the content comes off as stereotypical, or "low culture" as you put it. But frankly, I personally am glad that there is even a movie that addresses what I am feeling about today's black women to a T, be it high culture, low culture, or no culture at all. Because all too often, I am forced to see movies that are presented only from the women's side, or with the tired theme of men pursuing IMHO undesireable/unsuitable black women (those men I call "manginas"--a hybrid of "man" and "vagina"; you get the general idea of where I am going with this). Too many movies ignore the "Average Joe" brother and his attempts to land a woman with genuine intentions of seeking love and companionship, often resulting the the brother being slighted by the woman.

Just curious - IYHO, what "types" (my word) of women are considered undesireable/unsuitable?

Re: Re: Re: Interesting

Quote:

Originally posted by btb87
Just curious - IYHO, what "types" (my word) of women are considered undesireable/unsuitable?

In a nutshell, women who think just by virtue of the fact that they are women, are automatically entitled to get whatever they want from men, and/or are automatically entitled to get whatever man they desire, irrespective of whether or not they have anything of social, spiritual, or intellectual value to give in return. In short, they are spoiled brats, those that grew up getting anything they wanted, usually through their physical attractiveness, and thinking that as adults, they could still get by on their looks alone, while possessing a nasty, selfish, arrogant attitude

Usually, these types are the ones that loudly and arrogantly shout and proclaim that they are:

Independent women
Strong [black] women
Queens/Princesses
"Divas" (OMG, lemme leave this one alone) :mad:
etc, etc.

One thing I learned, the true strong, independent women (read: Proverbs 31 woman) NEVER has to proclaim any of the above, because their character and daily consistent actions always proclaims it for them without them saying a word.

Hope this helps.

I guess its just me, but why on earth would you want to see a movie that address the "other side" of a ridiculous stereotype and misconception? 'Cause let me tell you, it isn't just black men/women that deal with "baby momma drama" or the whole host of other issues that I guess we as black women have been "characterized" to do. :(

For every "neck rollin', let me stick 'em for his papers" sistah that is out there, you have PLENTY of ladies doing the right thing for the right reasons. But of course, no one will ever produce that movie because apparently, even some of us don't think it exist. :(

I guess this is just a movie rant in general. Blackwatch, PLEASE tell you wife to push her book to Intergrity Publishing!!!! PRONTO!! Now that sounds like something that I am familiar with and would like to see. :)

I agree with Blackwatch & Honeykiss.

I also appreciate the information about the high and low culture literature. I answers a lot of questions about why I do and don't appreciate certain things. Despite what some would say, it's not about 'being black' or 'acting white'. We need to stop seeing each other as sterotypes.

"I'll add a mf so you ignant n*ggas hear me" - Lauryn Hill

Re: Re: Re: Re: Interesting

Quote:

Originally posted by Rain Man
In a nutshell, women who think just by virtue of the fact that they are women, are automatically entitled to get whatever they want from men, and/or are automatically entitled to get whatever man they desire, irrespective of whether or not they have anything of social, spiritual, or intellectual value to give in return. In short, they are spoiled brats, those that grew up getting anything they wanted, usually through their physical attractiveness, and thinking that as adults, they could still get by on their looks alone, while possessing a nasty, selfish, arrogant attitude

...so once again, who exactly is forcing you to deal with these chickenheads? I mean, are they making you date/interact with them at crack-pipe point?

Really, all guys make a few "bad choices" in women along the way. That's life. But if a guy is consistently picking/interacting with women such as you've described, either he really does like that type and is deluding himself or he's got a self-esteem issue. Maturing men learn how to pick women worthy of themselves. The rest of this is excuse-making.

...and oh, yeah, the movie clip was stupid. but girlfriend in the green top with the pony tail was hot. :cool:

Re: Re: Interesting

Quote:

Originally posted by Rain Man
....

Because all too often, I am forced to see movies that are presented only from the women's side, or with the tired theme of men pursuing IMHO undesireable/unsuitable black women (those men I call "manginas"--a hybrid of "man" and "vagina"; you get the general idea of where I am going with this).

.....Too many movies ignore the "Average Joe" brother and his attempts to land a woman with genuine intentions of seeking love and companionship, often resulting the the brother being slighted by the "sista" for shallow, selfish reasons.

.....Just to add with regards to that "inter-racial" dating stuff: I don't think of what will be happening to average brothers as inter-racial dating, but inter-CULTURAL dating, which is why I wish they had the brother date a foreign woman, even an African or a Carribean woman would have made the same social impact as hime dating a white woman.

I see some of your points, especially the "man-gina" point in many movies (Tyler Perry movies have manginas all through them, and it drives me nuts. I don't think I'll watch any more of his movies). But, I also see in your response some resentment towards African American women in general, especially when you talk about inter -cultural dating. I agree with TonyB06, you probably need to be more discriminating with your choice of dating partners or mates, because if you think that the issue with African American women is their "culture" then you have simply chosen some "low-culture" African American women. This is the issue I have with brothers who want to generalize the sisters, and vice versa. Let's not generalize so much and do some critical self-examination. I think it is in self assessment, we will begin to lose some of the animosity that drives many black romantic relationships to the grave.

Blackwatch!!!!!!!

Re: YES! A MUST SEE IN-DEED!!

Quote:

Originally posted by Rain Man
YEAH-HAAAAAAAAAA!

*RM jumps in the air like the folks did in those old Toyota commercials*

ABOUT F[REA]KIN' TIME!

The preview clip was BRILLIANT!

I LOVED it when Brutha-Man put his foot up in those sistas' assets! The looks on their faces was PRICELESS!

If the rest of the movie is this good, then gosh-dangit I am straight up SOLD!!!

I got some fellow frat bruhs I need to run this by.

(and no, they are not APO bruhs, either) :p

This movie appears to be very low budget and superficial...

And the fact that RAINMAN endorses it is enough for me to give it the thumbs down sign...

ETA: And which FRAT is this if its not APO? You seem to be STILL avoiding the $60,000 question!

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Interesting

Quote:

Originally posted by TonyB06
...so once again, who exactly is forcing you to deal with these chickenheads? I mean, are they making you date/interact with them at crack-pipe point?

Really, all guys make a few "bad choices" in women along the way. That's life. But if a guy is consistently picking/interacting with women such as you've described, either he really does like that type and is deluding himself or he's got a self-esteem issue. Maturing men learn how to pick women worthy of themselves. The rest of this is excuse-making.

...and oh, yeah, the movie clip was stupid. but girlfriend in the green top with the pony tail was hot. :cool:

TonyB, this issue I have with Black women isn't limited to "chickenheads". Matter of fact, there is an old thread here in this very forum with some well-known individuals bragging and boasting of their " Pretty Princess/Queen" lifestyle. The funny thing about the whole thing was that the thread got locked after a brouhaha erupted over which one of them wore the bigger tiara, so to speak. So whether I am with a high-class sista, a homegirl, a hoodrat, or a hootchie, the mentality tends to be (note I didn't say "is") consistent across the board.

This whole mentality I speak of transcends the various "castes" of the African-American community.

^^^You need more women. Not just Black women. Women period. :rolleyes:

enigma_AKA

Re: Re: YES! A MUST SEE IN-DEED!!

Quote:

Originally posted by mccoyred
ETA: And which FRAT is this if its not APO?

*Rain Man chuckles*
Don't you wish you knew? :p :D

Quote:

You seem to be STILL avoiding the $60,000 question!

Very observant, McCoyred.

Besides, I'm waiting for the pot to swell to $125,000 before I even consider to "do my bidding" *LOL* :p :D

Quote:

Originally posted by enigma_AKA
^^^You need more women. Not just Black women. Women period. :rolleyes:

enigma_AKA

I'll buy THAT for a dolla! :D

BTW, you're absolutely right, Enigma.

More African women...

More Carribean women...

More Czech women *Grrrrrrrowwllllll*

RainMan...

In all of those instances, you'll find the Princess/Diva-esque attitudes...So, even if you branch out some/any/more, you'll get tired of women who think/know they are all of that and a bag of chips.

Every nationality has it's share of something. We got y'all....j/k!! :p

enigma_AKA