GreekChat.com Forums - Normal Fraternity in 3000 person Greek System w/o BIADS?

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- - Normal Fraternity in 3000 person Greek System w/o BIADS? (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=71264)

BIADS makes me think of band-aids or bisexual athletic directors

I keep reading this and still do not understand where You are coming from?

To many variables and How You stand with So Called National? Are You The Flag Ship School? If You are, you arent in any league that We know of.

No, the Question is not What Greek System We are in, all You have to do is read some of the Sigs and You will know!

Still not sure after rereading this angain some more Over and Over.

Your Fraternity Condones underage Drinking? It is acceptable on Your Campus? Where the Hell are You in Outer Space?;)

Your GLO is agreeable, sorry Dude, think Not!

What do You mean Your Fraternity is not single out By Your National. Who is it singled out By?

I'm sure your brothers across the country will love their increased insurance rates and the increased risk in a total shutdown of the entire national fraternity if a lawsuit were to occur.

They will understand if you tell them it's all for the girls.

-Rudey

Quote:

Originally posted by murraj
A lot of people are reading way too much into this. I'm not sure what Greek system you guys are in, but underage drinking at frat parties is a NORM in ours, we have 16 sororities, 28 fraternities with 3000+ members in total. The sorority girls want wet events, I used to believe a lot didn't, not so. Most of the girls that join sororities here do so to party and be in the social elite, just like the guys who join the fraternities. Bottom line is in our greek system, life for both fraternities and sororities revolves around booze. While the sororities can't have booze, they just go to the frats to drink, I can honestly think of 1 sorority and 3 fraternities that don't necessarily fit this mold, and they are both outcasts, and from personal experience, I can say their members are odd.

I should also mention that my fraternity is not being singled out by our nationals or our campus. Instead we are probably one of the most moderate houses in our greek system when it comes to drinking. In most houses here, at least 3/4, usually more, of the members drink, most likely in excess. My house is being used as an example to help reform the system here, nonetheless, reforms must be gradual, otherwise they will be too large for people to buy into them. In a lot of ways, it's like the frog in boiling water story: If you put a frog in a pan of cold water and let it heat up he won't notice, won't fight, and will just fall asleep and die, whereas he would fight if he was thrown straight into a pan of hot water.

The problem is the current norm is for this stuff to happen and to some extent around here have open parties, a lot of fraternities still even use Kegs, which are banned by our IFC. My house will not do either, but we do want to be able to fit into this environment and not be the outcasts of the Greek system, and at this time this means occasionally having a party where alcohol is served to minors. I also should mention the police here even have said they tacitly accept underage drinking, and use the JACKASS rule when it comes to giving out MIPS.

I completely understand that this is stupid. But to get a social fraternity experience here right now, requires a substantial amount of alcohol.

Keep the conversation going, lots of good comments so far.

I'm addressing your last post piece by piece cause it has a lot of info in it.

Quote:

Originally posted by murraj
[B]A lot of people are reading way too much into this.

Maybe so, but we only have so much info to go on at this point. We aren't experiencing this like you are, so of course our responses may be a little skewed. It's just the nature of the communication we have going right now.

Quote:

I'm not sure what Greek system you guys are in, but underage drinking at frat parties is a NORM in ours...

It's probably the norm in a lot of places, but it's killing our organizations slowly but surely. I remember what it is like being an undergrad...but there are certain things the organizations can do (and should do) in order to not only change that norm, but ensure that everyone stays safe.

Quote:

we have 16 sororities, 28 fraternities with 3000+ members in total. The sorority girls want wet events, I used to believe a lot didn't, not so. Most of the girls that join sororities here do so to party and be in the social elite, just like the guys who join the fraternities. Bottom line is in our greek system, life for both fraternities and sororities revolves around booze.

That makes me sad. To me, that's saying that life for a college student revolves around booze, and while that is probably true in a lot of situations, it still saddens me. I'd love to see someone go against that norm. Not saying you have to totally abstain from alcohol, but it's depressing to me that a lot of college students these days can't build a close relationship with someone else and enjoy their company unless some form of alcohol is present. I've seen and heard of so many events where the guys get obliterated and pee/puke on themselves, and the girls are crying of embarassment and anger because their special event/senior year is ruined due to stupid drunk behavior (and vice versa)...makes you wonder why groups should even bother spending the money to host an elegant, formal event.

Quote:

Instead we are probably one of the most moderate houses in our greek system when it comes to drinking. In most houses here, at least 3/4, usually more, of the members drink, most likely in excess. My house is being used as an example to help reform the system here, nonetheless, reforms must be gradual, otherwise they will be too large for people to buy into them.

You should be proud that your group is being used as an example to change the norms!!! That means someone sees some leadership within your group.

Norms are VERY hard to change...they don't change overnight, they don't change after one tragedy (reference Chico and Colorado here, among others), and there is no immediate gratification involved. Therein lies the problem. People these days can't see 10, 20, 50 years down the road. They think that the one small action they do today won't affect the future, so they don't do it. They procrastinate change. GLO's say "Well, no one will catch on to the dry mixer idea, we'll be the only ones and it will be a waste of time, so let's just do the drunk biad this semester and we'll work on planning a dry event for next semester." People do the same thing about diets..."I'll start the diet tomorrow/next week, so pigging out on the all you can eat cake buffet today won't make much of a difference. I'm still overweight. I'll start eating right tomorrow."

Quote:

The problem is the current norm is for this stuff to happen and to some extent around here have open parties, a lot of fraternities still even use Kegs, which are banned by our IFC.

FYI...99.9% of the National Groups have banned not only kegs but also open parties. Universities have banned kegs on their property as well. It's not just your IFC. I'm sure you already know that, though.

Quote:

My house will not do either, but we do want to be able to fit into this environment and not be the outcasts of the Greek system, and at this time this means occasionally having a party where alcohol is served to minors.

I think that if you guys want to challenge the status quo, just don't attend parties where the minors are served underage. When people ask why your group isn't there, tell them that you choose to live your values, and that includes personal integrity and abiding by what you agreed to abide by. Just say that matter of fact, without "judging" the other groups, and without talking about how everyone else will get in trouble for violating policy. It's a choice you made...that's it. Continue to be fine, upstanding, honorable gentlemen on campus who drink alcohol (if you choose) but don't get crazy with it, and lead quietly by example. Use a guest list for your events, and treat the people on those guest lists as the most special people in the world because they have the honor of attending one of your parties. If someone gets obilterated and acts horrible at your party, they aren't welcome back. Host fun, non alcoholic events...show that you guys can have a great time with MODERATE alcohol consumption (instead of going hog wild with it like some groups do). Do some catering and sweet talking to the women too. They control the fraternity social scene WAAAY more that you think they do.

Think of this from a marketing perspective...you don't want to be screaming at the top of your lungs "ALCOHOL IS BAD!!!! REPENT!!!!", but if you go about it quietly, without a fuss, you'll begin to get people's attention. Especially when the other groups start getting busted for alcohol violations and are suspended (which I STILL think there's a reason why people are nudging you towards not having biads with groups who don't follow the rules. I'll bet they see the trainwreck coming and don't want you guys to get caught in the middle. You may want to consider what they are saying as a big HINT.)

Once again, all of this is based solely on the information you've provided for us in this thread. Take what fits, leave the rest.

PsychTau

reading many of these recent responses makes me so proud of greeks standin up against the stereotype of greeks as alcoholics! the future of greek life is looking a little brighter.

Seems to me that the problem here is not in the soial aspect but as far back as recruiting...."Most of the girls that join sororities here do so to party and be in the social elite, just like the guys who join the fraternities" . Maybe someone should look into their chapter's and organizations history. We are to be taking members who are morally, academically, and civically superior.....thus this should not be an issue if we didn't recruit for numbers. Its unfortunate, but I know it is what many nationals focus on. Luckily, mine were different as my chapter had 8 members for a while. I'm sure we could have recruited using alcohol or the promise of kick ass parties and frat boys, but we chose to live up to the standards we took a vow to hold true to. And with following the rules and respecting our organization, we had the largest new member classes the last two semesters on our campus and will have 20 members at the end of the fall.

I urge you all who are ont eh right track to step up and speak up...a little louder. you got it.