because soap is soap, its self cleaning.

Joey: Did I get you?
Chandler: You get me, you kill me!

Chandler is a complex fellow, one who is unlikely to take a wife.

Gum would be perfection.

Hey buddy, this is a family place. Put the mouse back in the house.

Is that a pink shirt?

It's salmon!

Did I ever tell you about the time I went backpacking in Europe?

Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you?

Stretchy pants?! Well those are the greatest things in the world! If I were you, I'd wear them everyday everyday!

Hey, can we turn the heat down in this pressure cooker?!

Hey, if we were in prison, you guys would be like my bitches.

"I like that. what's your name? "

[pointing tape recorder at Phoebe]

"Pheobe. That's, P, as in Phoebe, H, as in heobe, O as in oebe, E, as in ebe, B, as in bebe, and E as in... Ello there mate."

Some girl ate Monica!!

You were going to drink the fat!

Tartlet...Tartlet...Tartleeet...The word has lost all meaning.