My family's been a longtime member/supporter of the United Filipino Council here, and every year they invite 18-20 year old women to participate in their Debutante Ball. So yes, it could be through a family's connections in society. Mine was a dream -- it was held at Washington Place, the governor's mansion.

Then you have the individual "coming out" galas thrown by families whose daughters weren't invited to the really big one. The idea's the same -- formally introduce the girl to Hawaii society -- but at the same time the parents like to show off how much money they have (to get back at being snubbed by the UFCH).

The only one I knew of in Pittsburgh was the St. Joan of Arc ball...thrown by the Diocese of Pittsburgh to recognize young women who performed community service/good works and were catholic (i believe, I could be wrong). But I remember my good friend was chosen and she had the most beautiful dress.

I believe there are only two recognized ones left in Toronto. One is the Helicon Ball, thrown by the (Hungarian) Helicon Society of Toronto. The other is The Cotillion Ball, which is held by a Carribean society. I tried to get one started for the Dragon Ball, which is a big deal fundraiser for the Yee Hong Geriatric Centre (seniors' centre for Chinese speakers), but it didn't work out.

There's the Cinderella Ball too, but the closest I've gotten to that is knowing a guy who was an escort.

There are more in Pittsburgh; there's one for hospital volunteers (the St. Cecelia, but you don't have to be Catholic), one for Polish women (I forget the name), the Southern Club, etc, etc.

I think every city has several, it's just finding the "Right One" that becomes important (in some minds).


I loved loved loved the ideas of a day at a spa or the Waterford vases! When I got married, my bridesmaids all got Waterford. It's gorgeous and never goes out of style!

I know my friend was a deb. and it was a ball thrown by foundation supporting a hospital I believe.

I just saw this - I had a friend who came out at the Cinderella Ball (but it was before I met her). The pictures are incredible!

I had a sweet sixteen which is just like a deb ball only i had mine while still in HS its a big deal in the southwest amongst mexican american families and a lot of fun .... i dont know about being a part of any association to have one .... In San Antonio Texas its just tradition you know and who gets to go well ofcourse your family and the sponsers (those that helped to pay for the party) the court of honor and their guest and anyone else the deb. wants to invite .... I have been to many over the years and still have more to go too .... w00t for a big family with kids still approcaching the 15 - 16 yr mark which is the usual time when we have them

I almost forgot about the gift
 

I forgot bout the gift ....

engraved stuff is ok and all but sometimes you can get to much of that ... I know i got it all the watch and jewlry and frames and dolls etc etc .... the best gifts came from my friends which were journals and cds and necklaces with oils and special pendants on them ... sometimes its the fun things that we remember and not the overpriced frilly shit ... thats just my opinion though

I don't think 16 is too young to be a deb. The people I spoke with at the Helicon society recommend that the deb still be in high school, because the Helicon Ball is held in February, right before Reading Week (second semester break). They don't want girls to come home "just because".

I didnt think 16 was to young to have one either .... some ppl find it weird that i had one at 16 when i told them about it at college ... for me its the norm and 18 and 19 seems like whoa

There are many debutante balls in New York City between Thanksgiving and the first week of the New Year.
The Mayflower Ball is for descendants of the Mayflower. They used to have their balls at the Waldorf and the Plaza Hotels, but now it's held at the University Club.
At the International Debutante Ball each deb has two dates: one in White Tie and the other in military uniform.
The Junior League also has one of the more exclusive debutante balls.

The movie "Metropolitan" shows the debutante season in NYC.

My friend was 20 or 21 when she made her debut. Her photograph was in the New York Times. :)

The last deb ball in Vancouver died out in about 1989. It was called the Governor's Ball and the Lt. Gov was the guest of honor in attendance.

<hijak>

Mr. A and I are going to hit this one next year. (Cant' furnish a new house and go to a ball in NYC in the same year. ;) )

If we end up having daughters, we're making sure they know this is an option if they'd like to debut.

</hijak>

--add

Sixteen isn't too young, but a lot of people consider your debut the point in time after which you can date.

I wasn't allowed to date until I was eighteen, so obviously a debut at sixteen would've been silly for me.

I'm not so sure about debuts at 20, 21, 22. One of my sisters *just* had one, and she's 23 (I think?) I'm guessing the meaning of the debut has moved less from "I can date now, and here's my introduction to society" to more of an, "I'm eligible for marriage now, and here's my introduction to society as a woman in my own right."