isukappa
 

you really conjured up quite an imaginativellook of yourself in my mind from your response about your fashion sense. i imagined a pnm coming in to a swanky sorority house wearing an old faded, stained, stretched out of shape t-shirt that belonged to her dad, and equally faded out pair of sweat pants, the legs of which were pulled up to just below the knee, a dingy pair of atheletic shoes, and her hair in little pig tails all over her head. i needed a chuckle and thank you for providing it for me!!

legacies
 

I disagree with saying "I prefer not to say". That leaves a lot of questions unanswered. The chapter member is then spending her time trying to figure out why this girl won't tell her legacy chapter rather than trying to get to know the PNM. You can make it clear that you are keeping your options open and be up front about your legacy status at the same time. Refusing outright to say what chapter you are a legacy to may be looked on more negatively than just answering. It is a natural question and no one should be surprised if it is raised.

But then the PNM needs to be aware that by answering her chances of being cut harder may be raised. I know it varies from chapter to chapter and campus to campus but the possibility does exist. All I'm saying is that she shouldn't feel like she absolutely has to answer the question if she doesn't feel comfortable doing so but by no means should she lie about it. Same goes with any other question that may come up during recruitment.

FSUZeta How did you know??? That's exactly what I wore to 15-party day! ;) :p

She should know, too, that a lot of houses will rush her HARDER because she's not their legacy! Some campus have a friendly rivalry going on -- they try to "steal" each other's legacies. It's all in good fun because (at my school, anyway), the legacies almost always go where they're a legacy at.

We stole a triple-threat (grandma, aunt, mom) one year. It was great. :D

i was one of those girls who broke alegacy. my mom, aunt, grandmother, and two cousins were chi omega, all holding leadership positions, and one who worked for nationals for 10 years. i went to chio up through pref night, but preffed sig delt, and i made the right choice. yes, it was difficult- my grandmother was obsessed with me being a chi omega, and is angry and resentful about the decision i made, but i have to live my life for me, and sigma delta tau is where i belong.

our legacy experience
 

Our experience with recruiting legacies has been all over the board! I am the Chapter Advisor for my Alpha Delta Pi chapter. We have seen the last couple of years go from 2 legacies participating in recruitment to 12 last year - a tremendous number for our university! (We pledged 10 last year, having released one.) If a particular PNM just isn't fitting in, we do release her, but early so that she may consider other chapters.

If you are a legacy and list it on your application, other chapters will notice. If they are "competitive" and try to steal you away, beware if they say, "They only want you because you are a legacy. We love you for who you are." There is another chapter on our campus where a couple of our legacies have pledged, and this has been known to happen. As a result, we find it hard to know how to treat PNM legacies! If we seem overly excited to meet her, she might think that to be the truth. If we ignore the fact she is related to an alumna, she might think we don't care at all. Catch-22!

Bottom line is go where YOU feel most comfortable. Not where your family or another person tells you that you are most comfortable! Have fun!

Beth Wright
jwright25