I usually say something like this. Those people are so clueless.

I dont think it is true that greeks pay for friends, i know that it is for mixers, formals, philanthropies, insurance, housing, yadayadayada. but you have to admit that the reason you join the "american society of civil engineers" is to network with engineers. you join "habitat for humanity" bc you want to build homes for the homeless. the reason you join an honor society is bc your grades are good or whatever the requirements are.
you join a social sorority/fraternity to make friends. I doubt anyone joined their glo bc of the creed or the philanthropy or because they play intramurals. all that stuff is something you can do whether you are in the glo or not. we joined to meet people that we wanted to be friends with, people who would be our brothers and sisters forever. it's not a bad thing, but you can't say that the statement is completely false.

I can kind of understand the guy's point of view. There are some greeks where they be nice to you when you are pledging so that way they have your dues and your number (for total). also you will automatically accepted if you go to other chatpers and travel to wherever there is a n ABC sorority. this is my two cents. Please no bashing.

No reason to bash-its your opinion!

Anyway-today I'm just trying to keep my distance from "the annoyance". I think everyone is pretty much annoyed w/ him because of his "attack & run" attitude. Its like he was scared that what we would say to him would actually make sense so therefore he just didn't want to hear it. Well, its his problem-not mine. I'll never regret joining Sigma Kappa.

Unfortunately the stigma
 

A lot of people say that about greek life. But come on, sounds like a lot of ignorant hating to me. Activities cost money, you're not paying money in a frat for someone to be your friend. You're paying to facilitate a number of activities. And the friends i've made are worth much more than frat dues. So maybe i should have paid more ;)

When one is talking one on one with a friend, there may be some point in responding by explaining why the "paying for friends" line is an unfair characterization.

But, in a group situation like you describe, I think the best and most effective response is to completely ignore him. Completely. If he keeps it up, don't argue or try to set him straight -- reply with a dismissive one-liner (like "then I didn't pay enough" or whatever works for you), then continue on with the conversation as though he hadn't said anything. He really doesn't warrant more.

You can do the "if I paid for my friends, I sure didn't pay enough approach" or you can retort by saying "and you were rejected a bid/or dropped from which fraternity for that attitude?"

If he says he wasn't greek - then politely (if you can) tell him not to form opinions over something he obviously knows nothing about....for it's better to be thought of as an idiot by keeping your mouth shut than by opening your mouth and removing any doubt.

i don't understand why he can't form an opinion about greek life if he wasn't a part of it. we have opinions about multitudes of things which we have never participated in. and i think that is pretty arrogant to think that he thinks greeks pay for their friends bc he wasn't given a bid. granted, the guy we are talking about does seem like a weenie for the hit and run comments, but it is a valid opinion. we joined purely (most of us, anyways) because we wanted to socialize with people. there isn't anything wrong with that

Hmmph. Sounds to me like the best response for him might be, "You might want to buy some, cause you sure aren't making any around here."

I like that one-I might just use that next time! LOL!

This one comes up a lot during recruitment--I try to make this comparison because the whole 'you pay to join other student organizations' never seems to work.

Some things an average high school senior vs. greek pays for:

Senior dues $50-$100 vs. National Dues
Yearbook $60
Senior Picture $50 vs. Composite

Prom tickets $75-$150 vs. Formal
Tux $100
Limo/Dinner $150
Flowers…$35

Homecoming $75-$125 vs. Semi-Formal

Sports $50-$200 vs. Greek league intramurals

And these are just some of the comparisons you can make.

My thing is about the whole 'paying for friends' comment.

If I'm paying for these friends, how come I don't get along with everyone? Or how come I don't like everyone? Or how come everyone doesn't like me?

HELLO!!!!!

You CAN'T like everyone. That is a fact of life. Some personalities just do not mesh.

I can't say that I have adored all my sisters but I have RESPECTED them all because they are my sisters.

This guy really needs a reality check.

I asked my sister's boyfriend if he was in a fraternity in college. He said, "No, I don't pay for my friends." Both of my biological sisters looked at me like :eek: ! I thought that it was funny and laughed. He's a nice enough guy, but he doesn't really know much about greeklife. I really don't get offended by remarks like that. I think that they are usually a joke or a reflection of ignorance.

When I was a student, I paid my dues which went to National, the campus, and to chapter operating costs including social, sisterhood, and service events as well as postage. I remember I had over 45 sisters, and dues meant that I paid less than $3 per sister per semester. That's a bargain! And it included my formal ticket. :) A date was extra and optional.

Don't worry about it when people say things about paying for your friends. You know that it isn't true. You don't need to explain yourself to anyone. It's not like you give each sister or brother money to be your friend. I'm pretty sure they know that.

I am not sure how I could pay for my Friends! I stated the Local that Became a LXA Chapter!

Pay for my Friends, then why have I been doing for almost 40 years!????:confused: :)

Why do I love meeting with Brothers few that they are of my age, and Brothers Who are so much Younger and in between for this long!:confused:

I and many others of Not only My Fraternity and Those of Soroities have been doing for so many Years?:confused:

If that is paying a cost for Friends, hell, count me in to that Group!:cool:

Okay, Example, just look on Greek Chat Threads to find the answers!:)

Just how do you pay for your Friends, by dues that make your Organization continue to function:confused:

God, Mental Peas are on board our Ship! SOS!:(

I admit, I pay for friends ... and they pay me back. Sharing is the idea behind it, and that's what we call BROTHERHOOD.
:D Go Greek!