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-   -   Poll: Tell Now or Wait for the Big Day (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=46608)

KSigkid 02-11-2004 09:19 PM

tell him now.

winnieb 02-11-2004 09:57 PM

Tell him now...
My husband was out of town playing exhibition bball games for 3 weeks when I found out I was pg w/ our oldest son. I decided to wait to tell him until he arrived home. My best friend knew I was pg. I still (son is almost 6yrs old) get crap from my husband that I told someone before him, and I waited 3 weeks to tell him.

My advice is this.....

tell him now
and
don't let him know that he wasn't person you told.


And congrats!!!!

-wendi

damasa 02-11-2004 10:11 PM

Tell him now.

If he asks you how long you have known and you tell him a few days then he's going to get pissed that you didn't tell him sooner.

astroAPhi 02-11-2004 10:34 PM

I would definitely tell him ASAP. Want the baby or not, it might freak him out a little bit. I think we all know what a huge responsibility a baby is!

ADPiAkron 02-11-2004 10:53 PM

How about this...

I think you should tell him now and I like the idea of V-Day with the card. Sooooo just tell him you got a great card for him for V-Day and you cannot wait until Saturday for him to read it...and then give him the V-Day daddy card! Just a thought to put the two ideas together! Congrats! How exciting...I am jealous!

Hootie 02-11-2004 11:06 PM

As much of a romantic I am and would do what everyone suggested with the Valentines thing....I'd tell him now. Seriously. Only because it IS such a big surprise that he may react in a way he'd feel uncomfortable if put on the spot!

James 02-12-2004 12:20 AM

Tell him now. His perspective might be different from your perspective . . so its important he knows soon. Did you guys ever decide what you were going to do about your, jobs, school, moving to Mexico, whether his parents are going to like you, marriage in general, or about life yet?

Tell him. Especially if you are not currently married.

He has a need and a right to know.

FeeFee 02-12-2004 10:15 AM

Congrats to the upcoming babyperson.

Tell him now.

:) :) :)

ADPiAkron 02-12-2004 10:42 AM

Sooooooooo did you tell him or not!?!?!

AlphaFrog 02-12-2004 10:43 AM

Ok, here's the whole story....

I did end up telling him last night and at first (I guess the shock of the news hit) he asked "Is it mine?"...I was like "What kind of stupid question is that?" and then the 'I'm going to be a daddy' thing set in and he drug me to walmart to start looking at baby stuff and rings. (It was adorable)

So the rest of the plan....

We are getting married in April (been planned for awhile, this is not a shotgun thing) and I'm going to continue in school as long as I can (since I'll probably be due around the first of Nov, I'll have to talk to my professors and see if I can arrange something). The plan is then to move to Mexico in December and then I'll have a little while to raise the baby and become absolutly fluent in Spanish and then the following August I'm starting work on a nursing degree from the Universidad de Veracruz. He's got a house down there and quite a bit of money saved up (at least enough for 6 months and some emergancies without either of us working...)

So, now the only thing left is to....ugh

Tell the parents all of this....
Since they will be in town the weekend we're planning on getting married, I thought about just springing it on them and saying "I know this is a shock, and we really want you to come, but if you don't we understand..." and leaving the Mexico thing out until later. I just don't know what to do. I know my mom's (at least after the initial reaction) going to be fine with it...she just wants me to be happy. My dad is a different story though (he's a bit racist and does not like Ernesto because he's "uneducated" [sorry he had to leave home at age 13 or 14 to start working to support his 11 brothers and sisters...not much of an option.]) So I'm really stuck as to what to tell them and when and how much and if I should start off just telling my mom and telling her not to even tell dad... I've had people tell me to just get married and don't even tell them at first, but I know my mom would be really, really hurt if I didn't give her the chance to go to my wedding...

Ok...another off the wall question for anyone who wants to jump in (especially you Shelia...) but what the heak, this is GC...Do you think it's inappropriate for me to wear letters while I'm pregnant since I'm still undergrad (but technically I'm alum)...like I said we're getting married in April so that would be before I'd start showing anything...

Tippiechick 02-12-2004 12:54 PM

As an alum who's back in school, I went through this same debate. I decided that it would be best for me to wait until the baby gets here to wear my letters again. I do have my license plate still on my car. But, I plan on having my letters on my car for many years to come.

I would ask your sisters on campus. Since you are still active, it might be better to ask their opinion on the subject.

Nikki_DZ 02-12-2004 01:20 PM

AlphaFrog-

First of all, congrats to you and your bf. It's an exciting time, and I'm glad you decided to tell him already (I woke my husband up at 5 am with "we've got to talk" LOL).

As far as wearing your letters, I don't see a problem with it, since you're an alumna. I'm 8 months pregnant right now (and pretty freaking noticable!), and wear my DZ windbreaker every morning when I walk the dog. My car has letters, and I often wear old party tees or whatever when running around. I don't see it as anything I shouldn't be proud of-if anything, I want my daughter to grow up knowing all about Delta Zeta.

Again, congrats!

Jaggergirl 02-12-2004 01:41 PM

We were pretty conservative about letters, so if it were me, I woulnd't wear them while pregnant until I was married. After that, its all joy!

Whatever you do, congrats and best wishes!!!


edited b/c I didn't read the whole thread like I should have.

_Opi_ 02-12-2004 05:41 PM

Alphafrog,

That's a real gift girl. Congratulations!

LXAAlum 02-12-2004 06:01 PM

Re: Poll: Tell Now or Wait for the Big Day
 
Quote:

Originally posted by AlphaFrog
Ok, I just found out for sure about an hour ago that I am pregnant....

This isn't exactly planned, but it isn't exactly unplanned...it was kind of...we know we want to have kids, and just figured it would happen when the time is right....I guess it's now!


First of all, speaking from experience- God does have a sense of humor - even if YOU don't think the time is right, He might...it happened to us 3 times - none were really "planned" - but we were elated nonetheless.

Congratulations - be sure to share the news while he's seated, or better, lying down, especially if he doesn't suspect a thing!


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