I don't have cable so I haven't seen this show. But if I were in the situation described, I would have politely informed the Norwegian that using the 'N' word is inappropriate, even if he hears some African Americans use it. If he intended to be malicious, I still would not have struck him.

Why do we allow this word to have so much power over us? The 'N' word is just that. A word. Yes, I fully understand the history behind its use. Yes, I have been called a n*gger on more than one occasion. However, I am intelligent enough to realize that 'others' use this word to provoke an ugly response from us. When we stop providing everyone's entertainment, like this young lady did, there will no longer be a reason for 'others' to use it against us.

Maybe I'm not being sensitive enough again, but that's my $.02.



[This message has been edited by MIDWESTDIVA (edited February 15, 2001).]

I'm sorry, but I can't get all emotional/sympathetic for Ayanna or any other person of color who purposely goes on these shows for the publicity, then acts an ass/gets all new to the game, whether they feel their behavior is justified or not. There ARE better ways of dealing with perceived or real acts of racism; hitting a person on national televisoin is not one of them. I don't think losing one's mother to cancer can be used as an excuse.

Ayanna HAD to have understood the game; she has been on an MTV show before. Thus, she understands that these shows are heavily edited to fit the producers' desired plot lines (slutty guy/girl; troubled gay/lesbian; innocent do-gooder; angry black guy/girl, etc.). She also understood that she was playing the role of "fiery/angry black woman". So, just as some on this board are saying the Norwegian guy shouldn't receive any sympathy (he should have known better), IMO, Ayanna shouldn't either (cuz she CERTAINLY should know better). Hitting someone is not right, and Ayanna's behavior simply played into MTV's and the wider world's perception that blacks are emotional, volatile people who act on instinct and can't think rationally and long-term.

It's really sad how we as a people will coddle even the most inappropriate speech and behavior from one of our own, making excuses all the way, but have a freakin' coronary about others' inappropriate speech and behavior. We always use the same tired excuse "racism in this country gives us a right to act an ass," or something to that effect. Yes, I understand that the lingering effects of racism do pervade our existence and thus inform our actions, but the blatant sting of racism dominated our foreparents' every move/opportunity, and most of them didn't cut the fool like some of us feel free to do.

Right is right and being black doesn't always give us carte blanche to forget the good sense our foreparents gave us.

Sorry for the book yall!

EXACTLY!

I don't believe that MTV is out to portray blacks in a negative light because there have been many black cast members that haven't acted irrational-Kameelah, Cynthia, the girl from London, Heather B, etc. Yes, at times they might have gotten mad and said things, but how many of us and the white people on the show haven't?

Everybody on that show gets rilled up. MTV doesn't pick the happy, straight, calm, friendly, on-track, etc. people (no matter what race) because that's not interesting to the audience. I know that I wouldn't watch it if it were so and not many others would. MTV has never been the norm and never will-that's what makes it so popular.

Plain and simple, this girl was out of line. She was CRAZY then and still is CRAZY. If she is so emotional about whatever is going on in her life, then she shouldn't have went back on the show-considering all the drama she went through the first time. She should have used the time to get her life on track.

Unfornately we may need to occasionally school "others" about race relations. However first we need to start with ourselves. Calling another Black Man a Ni88a is not okay simply b/c you are Black. If you think in terms of a Ni88a, you'll always be a Ni88a. Nor is it acceptable for females to call each other Bit*hes and Hoes. But why should we be called anything but, when so many of us are acting like Ni88as, Bit*hes & Hoes.
You can't expect more of others than you give of yourself.


------------------
"Don't hate me because I'm beautiful"

Amen!

I couldn't agree with you more. I think it's a shame that people do that..at some point I did to, but we must break all those cycles

Interesting to note that the Lieutenant Governor of California, Cruz Bustamente use this blasphemy at dinner put on by the Black State Capitol Worker's Union...

No, we don't own words to describe our worlds. However, as my old english professor would say, "Words are powerful, they are the symbols of ideas..."

VERY LONG POST, TAKE HEED!!!!!

Okay, now I've seen the show, now I feel warranted in voicing an opinion.


My take on Christian:

I don't believe that Christian is as innocent as he claims to be. As those of us who watch regularly know, this was not his first faux pas, but in my opinion, it was his least offensive.

I was a lot more OUTDONE when he told Ayanna and Laterrian that he "couldn't understand them sometimes, because they talk JIVE." and that sometimes he just, "says yes" even though he doesn't know what they're talking about. He must have access to somebody telling him something about black people to use the word JIVE, unless he's been wathing videos of THE MACK, or AIRPLANE 1, because who in the world still uses the word JIVE.

Then there was the time when he told Ayanna and Laterrian that he "must have some black in him", because he has big lips and a large nose. Now, he was told with love, respect and maturity that what he said was insulting. His response was to basically tell Laterrian that, "you know I don't mean it as an insult", so basically, quit tripping. What were Laterrian and Ayanna supposed to do, keep grinning until Christian stated making them sit on the back of that stupid bus. Or wait until he started getting off the bus late at night wearing a white sheet and carring a gasoline soaked cross, and some matches? Come on. IGNORANCE IS AS IGNORANCE DOES!!!!!

My question for Christian is this.... If you took a long vacation with your in-laws for the first time, and you kept putting your foot in your mouth, are you going to continue making yourself look like a jerk, or are you going to ask you spouse what is the best way to connect with your in-laws?

He had PLENTY of access to black people who were willing to assist him. HE NEVER ATTEMPTED TO GET AN INSIGHT. Christian spoke first, and dealt with cause/effect second.


My take on Ayanna:

I do not condone violence. I thought Ayanna was WAY OVER THE TOP in her reaction to the situation. There was absolutely no reason for her to put her hands on Christian. After all, she's not out at Ku Klux Klan rallies roughing up folks, so I don't agree with her methods at all.

However, Ayanna recently suffered a terrible loss. Speaking as a person who lost her father just nine short months ago, it's a devastating blow. Things that would be a 3 on a 10 point scale, suddenly become a 5545454 to the 11th power. I think christian really caught her off guard with his comment. The day before, she had opened herself up to him, and to hear him make that comment probably felt like somebody rpping the scab off of a sore that was just starting to heal.

My problem with Ayanna wasn't that she wouldn't apologize to Christian. Heck, who wants to apologize when they feel that they haven't done anything wrong? My problem is that she wouldn't OWN her behavior. She wanted to say "It's just me being real to myself. I couldn't sleep if I wasn't true to myself." That's bull and she knows it.

My question for Ayanna is this... If she could have a conversation with cancer, would she want cancer to tell her that cancer took her mother because that's what cancer does? Cancer was just being itself? It couldn't sleep at night if it wasn't covering, destroying, rotting and breaking -down the organs of humans (my father died from liver cancer)? Or would she want cancer to say yes, it took her mother, but maybe there was another way it could have been handled.


Okay, these are just my opinoins.


Miss. Mocha

Quote:

He must have access to somebody telling him something about black people to use the word JIVE, unless he's been wathing videos of THE MACK, or AIRPLANE 1, because who in the world still uses the word JIVE.

Sidebar: LMAO! That is too funny. You really took me back. I love that movie. Remember the part with the nuns talking jive and playing the guitar!?! ...The sick girl with the IV that got knocked out!?! http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/eek.gif

Whew! I gotta catch my breath. Thanks for the trip down memory lane! I gotta go rent that movie. http://www.greekchat.com/forums/ubb/biggrin.gif

[This message has been edited by Serenity (edited February 17, 2001).]

:confused:

Hi everyone. I realize this topic is four years old, but it touches on a topic that my friends and I have discussed many a times. I do not want to offend anybody and if I do, please let me know. I sometimes have trouble wording things. Just a little background on me... I am white. My parents were never married, so I grew up in two very different neighborhoods which I think has helped me be a well rounded individual. One neighborhood was predominately white and in the other we were the only white family. The color of skin is not one of the first things I notice. However I do live in the south. I overheard someone say the N word one day when I was about 5 and when I went home I said something with that word in it. My mom smacked me across my face and I haven't said that word sense. Personally,the N word makes me cringe whenever I hear it. I think it makes people sound uneducated and direspectful. As someone said earlier, African-Americans call each other Ni..a and it is perfectly acceptable, however if someone outside of that race (with the exception of extremely close friends) says it, it is an extremely hurtful phrase that can cause fights and riots. Its kind of like girls calling each other sluts, hoes, whores, etc... it is okay for girls to call other girls that, but as soon as a boy calls a girl one of those names, a smackdown is in order. I have an 8 year old brother. He picks up on a lot of phrases he shouldn't...however in my opinion some of the phrases he picks up on shouldn't be said in his presence. The problem I have with groups being able to call members of their groups names without consequences is children pick up on the phrases and start using them. They see girls calling each other hoes and laughing it up, but the minute they say the phrase they get smacked and get into severe trouble. Every group has an adjective that is hurtful when used by people not in their group (and sometimes by people in their group)...African-Americans-Ni..a, White folks-Cracker, Gays- Fag...And I am as guilty as the next person for calling my girl friends sluts, hoes, and homewreckers.... but what I don't understand is why we have to use the words at all...why do we have to teach the next generation these spiteful words? Sorry my post got so long, and again it was not my intention to offend anyone and I am really sorry if I did. Thanks for any input...Elicia

It's very interesting that you brought this thread back to the top b/c the following article popped up in my inbox today. Since it is fairly long, then I will just quickly say that I can not condone the usage of the "N-Word" in any form from anyone. I have heard the arguments regarding the spelling of the word as well as those saying that we need to take ownership and change the meaning of the word. However, for myself and those around me, I feel it is a slap in the face to my ancestors to make light of a word carried so much pain and hurt for so many years.

Marie

A Hip Hop Clothing Store Called 'Nigger'

My name is David Sylvester and I recently completed a charitable bicycle
trip in Africa, riding over 7000 miles from Cairo, Egypt to Cape Town, South
Africa . The trip made me the first and only African American to cross two
continents on a bicycle. I have plenty of great and fascinating stories.
Many are funny, others bittersweet, some are poignant, but all are
entertaining. Surprisingly one story has stood out and if it was not for the
fact that I have a picture of it, many would never believe it. and it is for
that reason that I am sharing it with you.

While in Lilongwe, Malawi, I came across a store by the name of "Niggers"
---that's right " Niggers"! The other riders, who were all white, could not
wait to inform me of this to see my reaction. Initially, I thought that it
was a very bad joke but when the other riders were adamant about the
existence of the store, I had to see it for myself.

What I found was a store selling what the owner called 'hip hop' style
clothing . It was manned by two gentlemen --- one of them asleep! (Talk
about living up to or in this case down to a stereotype) I asked the guys
what was up with the store name. After hearing my obvious non - Malawian
accent and figuring out that I was from America, the man thumped his chest
proudly and said "P-Diddy New York City! we are the niggers!"

My first reaction was to laugh, because many things when isolated can be
very funny, but it quickly dawned on me that this was so not funny at all.
It was pathetic. I did these bicycle trips across the USA and through the
'Mother -Land' in honor of one of my good friends, mentors and fellow
African American, Kevin Bowser, who died on 9/11. Here I am, a black man
riding across the world on his bicycle in honor of another black man, riding
'home' and what do I see?? Some Africans calling themselves Niggers! They
were even so proud of it they put it on their store front to sell stuff.
When I relay the story to folks back home in Philadelphia, most of them
laugh too and rationalize it by saying 'well, we can say it to each other'
or 'there is a difference' or even 'they just spelled it wrong. It should
have been 'nigga's' or 'niggah's' Gee like that would make a difference.

The issue is not the spelling. I was wrong. We are wrong. There is no
justification for an infraction of this magnitude. The word and the
sentiment behind it is Flat out wrong! We have denigrated and degraded
ourselves to the point that our backwards mindset has spread like a cancer
and infected our source, our brothers, our sisters, our Mother Land. I have
traveled all over the world and have never seen a store by the name of "Jew
Devils", 'spic bastards' , 'muff divin''' dykes' or anything like that- Only
the store niggers!

I am to blame for this. Every time I said the word I condoned it, by not
correcting others or rationalizing it gave it respectability, by looking the
other way when others said 'hey nigga what's up' allowed others to see it
and ultimately that when I purchase CDs, DVDs, T-shirts and other stuff, I
enriched it. I now see the error in my ways and I am so so sorry black men
and women. The flame that we called entertainment, that was only to warm and
entertain us, now engulfs us and scorches our own self esteem. If a child
only knows to refer to men and women as niggers, bitches, pimps and hoes,
then what is he/she to grow up thinking of themselves and others as he/she
gets older?

This is no joke you can see my site
www.contribute2.org/<http://www.contribute2.org/> and read some more
stories. The bottom line is this I rode over 12000 miles on 2 continents
through 15 states and 13 countries and broke 2 bikes in the process to get
to a store in AFRICA called niggers. I am willing to step and admit my part
in the havoc that we have wrought on our mindset but I think that We all are
to blame.

I finish with 4 things:


if you don't like being called a nigger, bitch, faggot, dyke, spic, Jew dog,
wop, towel head or anything of that ilk- then THINK. THINK before you speak
those words, write those lyrics, support that rhetoric and most of all THINK
before you purchase! Purchasing is akin to compliance- I may like the beats
and rhythms of some songs but I can not support it any more. You rappers are
intelligent- find another word to describe your selves

Slaphappy
 

Interesting that that doesn't happenend that much these days... That's why the next generation won't learn the difference...

The "N" word
 

We need to actually realize the negative connation that this word has on our race. It was thrust upon us by slave masters....who wanted to demoralize us! why some use this word as a term of endearment is mystry to me. The good point is more and more educated mothers and fathers are teaching their children not to use this vulgar term so loosly. I know at times I act a fool on the board and kid around but some issues I take more seriously than others. Some need to do more history searching on the terms they use. History can repeat itself in different way. :eek: