First of all, thanks for all the comments/suggestions. Let me explain a bit more.

I was married before, to a man who was only capable of romance as an apology ("I'm sorry I ____. You know I love you."). When he asked me what I wanted for my birthday once, I said, "romance," knowing that we didn't have a lot of money. I got party hats & candles that wouldn't blow out. So, if I sound a little nervous, I'm sure you'll understand that I'm only telliing y'all the tip of the iceberg.

My fiance & I do have issues, major issues, and we need counseling on a lot of areas. This is obviously one of them. Again, I don't need roses every week, or extravagant displays, but a simple "I'm thinking about you" email or such would be huge in my eyes.

Meremere, I completely understand what you're saying, and realize its truth. Those little things are wonderful! But at some point, we have to get this issue straightened out to both of our satisfaction.

On the surface, my parents weren't very romantic at all, yet every night, before they went to bed, they said "their speech" to each other, a 3-4 sentence statement of their love for each other that my mama won't tell me what it exactly was until she too passes away. The day my daddy died, he doodled my mama's name while on the phone. Maybe they set the bar too high, and I'm expecting too much.

I completely understand where you are coming from honeychile. In the beginning romance IS important, especially if you are used to only getting romance when he did something wrong. Some guys, however, just don't get it. It doesn't mean they don't love you or care about you, they just don't get it that they need to TELL you these things.


have y'all tried counseling? people think its for people with problems, but it actually is helpful for happy couples to keep their relationship running smoothly. Its a good way to have a non partial mediator to communicate your feelings to one another.