I think it is a good idea to live together. Yes it would be nice to have that new expierence when you are first married. The only thing is if you get married and can't handle living with each other drving each other nuts you can end up divorce. I think its better to find out if you can work out and compromise things while living together before marriage. I plan to get married once and stay married so I rather do everything I can to know it will work out more than likely.

Move in together, but only if you're one of those girls that have to clean all the time. I love those girls. They just come over and cant stand to see a mess, they gotta clean.

I really, really agree with this.

When I was 20, I moved in with a guy I had known for one week. Yes I know that's a little extreme, crazy even. Of course it didn't work out, and the relationship lasted for about 6 months. Do I regret it? No, it was an interesting experience, and I believe that it's better to do something than to regret not doing it.

I would also never marry someone without living with him first. I don't think that you really know what you're getting into until you live together, and I think it's pretty darn important to know what it's like to actually share a home with someone. I couldn't live with OR marry someone who expected me to do ANY of his laundry or do more than half of the work around the house, and you don't really know how a guy is going to hold up his end of the deal until he actually does it.

Any of his laundry? C'mon Valkyrie, isnt that a little extreme? Chicks are supposed to do some of it. Thats just the price you pay for not developing a penis.

Hahahahaha!!! You're funny! I've never done a guy's laundry and I never will. Mr. valkyrie doesn't seem to mind, either. ;)

I wouldn't know how to respond to a girlfriend that told me that.

Well, cash, I think it goes without saying that a guy like you and a woman like me would never date. ;)

I said I would never do a guy's laundry either.......ha lets just say things change ;) Thats all I do now....between my husband and our son discovering dirt is portable, laundry is a part of my daily routine - only a tiny portion of it is mine.

Since I've been married and divorced twice, I can honestly say that I'd have saved a lot of money and heartache had I lived with either of my exes first. I would not have married either of them if I had lived with them first!

As for laundry.. it's ok to do some of his laundry as long as he does some of yours too. It's got to be a two way street! Same with cooking, cleaning, etc.

Dee

My fiance and I are living together... but we didn't move in together until after we got engaged (with a wedding date set), and we had already been together for 3 years. After we got engaged we decided to go ahead and move in together, so that neither of us would be stuck in a lease with another roommate at the time of our wedding. I don't regret it at all, we get along great.

I think it's decision that only you and your boyfriend can really make, because every relationship is different. However, if it's a new relationship, I do think it's a little soon to get that serious.

This is something I've been grappling with as well. Although my relationship is not new or fairly new (3 and a half years this week), we're going to wait until we have set a date.

The reason for the relatively long wait? I'm pretty young, and I wanted to see what it was like being a young woman living on her own in the city. I remember there was an episode of "Friends" where Rachel's mom regretted the fact that she went "straight from [her] father's house to the sorority house to [her] husband's house." If you've already experienced life on your own (outside of college!) and a few heartbreaks, I'd say go for it. Otherwise, it really can't hurt to wait.

If the relationship is "worth it," living together can wait--especially if you're very young and the relationship is new.

Off Topic: I bet you are usually the more dominant one, in a relationship Valkyrie?

If we do your laundry we are going to ruin it.

We wash everything in Cold. And believe the dryer solves all clothing problems.

Let us wash at your own risk. We ruin our own stuff.

Thats why I send my laundry out.

Well, roxydiva, you've gotten lots of advice (I won't say good or bad!) on this issue. I will throw in my two cents in a minute, but I do want to make one important point to you. EVERY relationship is different. Only you know where your relationship is, and what could make or break it.

With that said Mr. ajuhdg and I lived together for six months (good idea to have a short lease, just in case!) after we had dated for a year. It was TERRIBLE. He was a spoiled rotten brat...okay well I am too! Neither of us was prepared, and the six months ended with me kicking him out and him moving into his frat house. We were broken up for about three months, and it allowed us both some time to reflect. (I know it sounds cheesy!) We both knew that we wanted to be with each other, and our living together made us realize that real relationships are about compromise. We dated for four more years, and we've now been married for a little over two.

Here's my point...I personally would have killed him if we would have never lived together before we got married....it's just TOO different! Plus, living together lets you see how much work you have ahead of you! ;) It took me a year to train him to put the toilet seat down!

aj

Hahaha!...lol. Thats pretty funny.;)