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-   -   Something for PNMs to Remember (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=35965)

AlphaChiCutie 07-21-2003 01:07 PM

I think all the advice people are giving is so helpful. I wish I had heard all this when I was going through (just to save some headaches and confusion). My advice, after seeing friends set their hearts on one specific chapter and not win out, is just to BE OPEN MINDED throughout the process. Don't talk about your "favorites" with other PNMs. Don't think you have to go where other girls from your city/state/school/neighborhood have gone. You will be much happier if you fin the place right for you, not other girls with the same zip code as you.

KappaKittyCat 07-21-2003 02:03 PM

I agree. To a certain extent, I think that we could take a lesson in discretion from our NPHC potentials and our NPC PNAMs. It'd be much easier for PNMs truly to follow their hearts if they didn't have an entire group of friends/colleagues pulling them this way and that. Also, keep in mind what your mom always taught you: If you can't say something nice, keep your trap shut! ;)

justamom 08-01-2003 08:32 AM

As things get near, I just want to reiterate what KappaKittyCat and AlphaChiCutie have said.

College is the time when you step away from the crowd and become your OWN person. It's a time when you need to discover who you are in your OWN right. It can be difficult to look beyond the old hometown pull and the pressure (tent talk) of those you've known over the years or girls you see and think they have it all going on. How can THEY possibly know what's best for YOU?

Many girls have gone through rush and at the first moment of disappointment, quit. Others have never gotten over the "loss" when they see their friends going to "different" parties, more parties OR, as they have been led to believe, better parties.
Do not let this deter you. IF you want a Greek Life and IF you're
open, you may find more happiness and opportunity to become the person you were meant to be than had you followed the norm.

May I add-not everyone IS suited to sorority life. Sometimes as you go through the process it may become clear that this really ISN'T you. There is nothing wrong with those feelings. Just don't
deny yourself an opportunity based on someone else's experience with recruitment.

MSKKG 08-01-2003 10:19 AM

Excellent advice all around! Standing ovation for everyone!

Not a Mezzo 08-02-2003 11:31 AM

Bravissima, ladies! I hope at least some of you were Rho Chi's, because your advice is so marvelous and helpful.

I got sort of lucky when I went through recruitment. I rushed as an older, wiser (sometimes ;) ) sophomore. I'm from New Jersey at a school where most people are from North Carolina, so no same-zipcode issues. Also, I'm a music major, and most of us tend to stay "with our own kind" as far as venturing out of the music building goes. There are also three excellent music fraternities, so many who want Greek life look to the School of Music itself to provide.

That said...the week of recruitment is very emotional. For me, everyone looked wonderful, and I had a difficult time choosing where to go back. Just quiet all those clamoring thoughts, doubts, ideas, emotions, etc, and listen to the quiet voice of your heart. You really will know where you fit best, if you take the time to relax and let your true feelings show. You may end up somewhere completely unexpected, like I did. But no matter what, you'll end up somewhere amazing. Good luck to all of you. You are each amazing women who will be assets to whatever sisterhood you eventually call "home."


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