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-   -   Too Many Recs? (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=243932)

naraht 06-20-2018 01:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EliBean (Post 2457235)
naraht, to answer your question, it is an SEC school. That's one of the reasons I didn't think having four recs for one sorority could possibly be that big of a deal. Everyone says to have one or two for each sorority, and even if that one sorority writes her off as trying too hard for having more, at least there are plenty of other options.

Oookay. As the others have commented, there are lots of threads about rushing at SEC schools, you can probably find one within the last couple of years specifically on the one she is attending...

And I recommend a Merlot.

FSUZeta 06-20-2018 07:21 AM

I read a great article that suggested that the parents head out for a trip after their brand new college student is safely ensconced in her/his dorm room. The reasoning was so you don't straight home and turn junior's room into a shrine. We never had a chance to do that due to other obligations, but it makes sense. The trip is something to look forward to, after a potentially sad event.

NYCMS 06-20-2018 10:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FSUZeta (Post 2457250)
I read a great article that suggested that the parents head out for a trip after their brand new college student is safely ensconced in her/his dorm room. The reasoning was so you don't straight home and turn junior's room into a shrine. We never had a chance to do that due to other obligations, but it makes sense. The trip is something to look forward to, after a potentially sad event.

Fabulous idea. Even better if it's somewhere that keeps you really occupied so the details of rush don't break you down!

One point I'll add for the OP is that at some SEC schools (Ole Miss is the one I'm most familiar with) is that moms send "rush gifts" during the week to "keep the spirits up" of their daughters. My friend from out West - whose daughter rushed at Ole Miss a few years ago - was pretty surprised when her daughter called home talking about all the gifts her friends got. There's also the "Bid Day Baskets" gifts that are routinely sent to the daughter on Bid Day. Not sure if this is done outside of the SEC, but it is big at some schools so good to know about.

So to the OP - find out if this is the case at your daughter's school and if so, there will be stores in town that cater to this that you can order online from. And depending on the school your daughter goes to, parents show up en masse on Bid Day, even flying in from out of state (cue my friend from LA who flew to Bama for Bid Day!) - not everyone, of course, but if I think this stuff is important to know in advance. It's gotten so big at Ole Miss that they now give wrist-bands to parents/siblings to manage the crowd and add security.

EliBean 06-20-2018 11:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FSUZeta (Post 2457250)
I read a great article that suggested that the parents head out for a trip after their brand new college student is safely ensconced in her/his dorm room. The reasoning was so you don't straight home and turn junior's room into a shrine. We never had a chance to do that due to other obligations, but it makes sense. The trip is something to look forward to, after a potentially sad event.

We are sort of doing that. After we leave her we are going to visit our family and friends for a bit. Her brother starts school the week after we drop her off, so we don't have too long to do anything. It's a great idea, though.

EliBean 06-20-2018 11:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NYCMS (Post 2457253)
Fabulous idea. Even better if it's somewhere that keeps you really occupied so the details of rush don't break you down!


So to the OP - find out if this is the case at your daughter's school and if so, there will be stores in town that cater to this that you can order online from. And depending on the school your daughter goes to, parents show up en masse on Bid Day, even flying in from out of state (cue my friend from LA who flew to Bama for Bid Day!) - not everyone, of course, but if I think this stuff is important to know in advance. It's gotten so big at Ole Miss that they now give wrist-bands to parents/siblings to manage the crowd and add security.

I actually heard that some parents spend the week in town for recruitment. I told her that, and she just laughed and laughed and told me no. Are there any schools that the majority of parents come for bid day? I hadn't even thought of that, but unless it's one of those things where she'd feel left out if she didn't have someone there, I doubt she'd want us to come.

My sister mentioned the bid day baskets, but I will look into the Rush Week thing as well. Thank you!

Titchou 06-21-2018 07:00 AM

Alabama does the wrist band thing at most groups...and the Bid Day packages...the chapters used to limit the number of family members on Bid Day...be sure and ask the Greek Life office or any friends who attend at her school what's the norm on her campus...Auburn also restricts the number of people in the sorority area....

NYCMS 06-21-2018 10:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EliBean (Post 2457282)
I actually heard that some parents spend the week in town for recruitment. I told her that, and she just laughed and laughed and told me no. Are there any schools that the majority of parents come for bid day? I hadn't even thought of that, but unless it's one of those things where she'd feel left out if she didn't have someone there, I doubt she'd want us to come.

My sister mentioned the bid day baskets, but I will look into the Rush Week thing as well. Thank you!

The family crowds at Ole Miss are huge (which is why they now have limits and wrist-bands) - it's almost always all the Mississippi parents and some from nearby states - Texas (tons of Texas students there now), Alabama, Tenn., etc. And some fly in from out of state (like my friend from LA who went to Alabama for Bid Day). It varies for out-of-state, especially out-of-region, parents. And some parents go up for the latter part of Rush Week, but the ones I know are all in-state and neighboring states, usually moms who went to Ole Miss themselves. At Ole Miss so many parents own condos now that it's an easy thing to do - those are usually alums who come every weekend for football games so it was cheaper to buy a condo that constantly pay for hotels.

If you can't be there, don't worry - with the huge out of state population at the SEC schools, I'm sure there are plenty of girls whose parents cannot make it so I really doubt she'll feel like something's missing. Quite frankly, I think it's rather over-the-top to have parents there and moms "running to the house" with their daughters as if they're new members too, posing for pictures while making the Greek symbols of the chapter, etc.

Call me old-fashioned but I liked it when it was just my new pledge sisters and me running to the house and connecting with our chapter sisters without such over-the-top hoopla - I think that sets new members up to expect that level of excitement and rah-rah all the time, when in fact, it's just one day. But then, times are different now, for better of worse.

carnation 06-21-2018 11:32 AM

Moms run? And do the symbols? :eek:

NYCMS 06-21-2018 11:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnation (Post 2457298)
Moms run? And do the symbols? :eek:

Yep. That's why I think it's so over the top. That and all the crazy costumes the members wear on Bid Day and the huge parties they put on...and that's not just at SEC schools, it's in a lot of other regions. Someone is making a fortune off the 'costume' stuff these chapters buy (boas, sparkle stuff, tu-tu looking skirts, head gear, face paint, etc.). As for parties, I know some chapters go off-site to host parties while I know of one chapter at Ole Miss who did a whole take-over on a candy bar theme with super-lavish displays of food, candy, decor, etc. It looked like something out of Martha Stewart Living!

33girl 06-21-2018 02:11 PM

The parents thing....just eek, cringe, no. As for gifts, I got an iron on letter t shirt. That was it. And I was ecstatic!

AnchorAlumna 06-21-2018 03:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnation (Post 2457298)
Moms run? And do the symbols? :eek:

No running, but they might pick up a little on them while the girls are being taught them and waiting to take the en masse photos. I have seen online detailed discussions of what moms are going to wear. I want to tell them that nobody is going to be looking at them, but I figure hey, they'll find out soon enough they are no longer the center of attention.

We all know there are moms who are there for every single minute, ready to press a dress, press a cool cloth to a brow or press back on a press-on nail. Then there are the parents who want to come into the parties with their PNMs, and that famous story about the mom who climbed up in a tree to see in the windows during a party.

I would have been mortified to see my parents there.

carnation 06-21-2018 03:49 PM

Who was that who told us about the mom in the tree? MaryPoppins?

NYCMS 06-21-2018 04:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnchorAlumna (Post 2457308)
No running, but they might a little while the girls are being taught them and waiting to take the en masse photos. I have seen online detailed discussions of what moms are going to wear. I want to tell them that nobody is going to be looking at them, but I figure hey, they'll find out soon enough they are no longer the center of attention.

We all know there are moms who are there for every single minute, ready to press a dress, press a cool cloth to a brow or press back on a press-on nail. Then there are the parents who want to come into the parties with their PNMs, and that famous story about the mom who climbed up in a tree to see in the windows during a party.

I would have been mortified to see my parents there.

The LAST people I wanted to see on Bid Day were my parents, LOL. It was "my" time, not theirs (or even theirs to share). And the mom who climbed into a tree? She needs to get a life (and likely some therapy). That is beyond belief, but then life is stranger than fiction.

celebcj 06-24-2018 04:28 PM

i'll bite. i went through recruitment in fall 2012, and even back then i was baffled to hear of fellow OOS girls' moms staying in the Auburn Hotel that week. Girls would sleep in the dorms (unless they "just needed their mama" after hard cuts), then go over to the hotel to presumably get groomed and pep talked for the day. I wonder had my mom fixed my hair and pressed my dresses (which she does beautifully, and I was still learning lol) would I have ended up somewhere differently? Nah, I was meant to be a Theta through and through!

back then, unlimited family members could come to bid day, and boy were there lots. my parents were clear on the west coast, so I texted mom I received my bid, and called them later after my bid day buddy / group and I returned from lunch.

I do wish I had had my mom/family there with me to celebrate, even though I wasn't a legacy anywhere, but it was the first of many parents' weekends/tailgates I experienced without my parents... part of growing up I guess.

carnation 06-24-2018 05:31 PM

I rushed at Auburn a zillion years ago. There were fraternity guys cheering us on as we ran from Social Center to our sorority dorms but I didn't see any parents!

I was OOS too. My parents didn't make it to AU until my graduation. Back then, there weren't all these parent-daughter activities but I wished my parents could've come by a few times like nearby girls' parents did.


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