a solution...
 

what my chapter does on pref night is have TWO women talk--one who is pretty upbeat and crazy, and one who is known to be a bit more emotional. that way, although both women talk about the great friends and memories they have of pi phi, the PNMs can see the diversity and different approaches we take to sisterhood!

Pref & Crying
 

I feel that it is 100% fine to cry and/or show emotion at pref parties.
I am an Alpha Xi Delta legacy, but I am an AOII for many reasons. I am about to become alum, but I can still remember the day I put AOII in the #1 slot and AZD in the #2 slot.
When I went to AOII's pref party, I knew that I was where I was supposed to be. I could tell that the girls speaking really meant every word they said. Ultimately, that is what made my final decision. Since AOII showed emotion and sincerity, I choose them, and I have not had one regret since.

Okay, I come at this issue in a different way. As a recruitment advisor I've been on a campus where crying and sobbing during pref became a competition between chapters. Honestly you'd think the women were attending a funeral, not a preference party. It became a source of pride for each sorority when they had each and every member weeping. This tended to freak out some of the pnms, and I didn't blame them.
Crying during pref is fine, I did it and still do, but the focus of preference is on your pnm. It should be about how much you feel for your sisterhood and much your chapter wants this experience for other women that you've gotten to know during rush. If you cry naturally during this moment, fine, but don't force it, that is miserable and pnms can absolutely tell.

It is wierd that a lot of girls are saying it is inappropriate to cry. I just talked to some girls (rho chis, dont worry) and they all said that in all of thier sororities, they try to say emotional things that make you want to cry, because if a pnm feels that strongly by pref night, just think how strongly she will feel when she is a sister, or something like that.

Wow, I didn't realize how EMOTIONAL some people are about not crying at pref nite. I wasn't even supposed to give a speech at my pref nite but the girl who was supposed to give it got sick. So, an hour before our first pref party, I was stuck with nothing to say.
So, when it came my turn to give a speech on sisterhood, I started talking about being the 'friggin' oddball throughout sorority rush. And not really trusting my sisters at first because of the fact that I was one of three non-whites in the whole Greek system at our school. And the situation when I had a 'moment' with some of my sisters at a 'social' event. And how they got my back.
Now, imagine me, hoarse from cheering and singing and talking. . .trying to tell a story about the moment I learned to let my guard down and let people get close to me. . .I had the entire room cryng and a bunch of the rushees. Afterwards, as I was turning to the potential next to me and saying, 'That was stupid'. . .she was bawling. I felt bad and she just hugged me and said that my speech was 'touching'
I refused to do the next pref. And they understood. No one wanted to cry anymore.

I think the best thing we did yesterday at Pref. was to reherse with the whole chapter about half an hour before. We got the majority of our crying out but were still shedding a few tears during the real thing! That way we weren't totally bawling but it looked a little more believable I think.

White_Chocolate: That was an awesome story. It kind of made me weepy & I'm just sitting here!

Which is why I don't want them using me next year. After a while, I feel like the 'showcase' sorority sister.

Funny, I was a big Drama freak too.

I read this thread, and I had to laugh thinking of our last Pref.

Our sister, Ashley, is this tough girl who doesn't take any sh*t from anyone. She gave a speech during our Pref party about why she loves our sorority. And at one point, she put her head down, sniffled, and whipped the corner of her eye. Everyone who knew her was all amazed. "Oh my God, Ashley's actually crying???"
After the party, I went up to her and told her how surprised I was to see her cry. She says to me, "Sh*t, I was totally faking it! I forgot what I was going to say, and I needed to buy some time to remember my lines!"

I just thought I would share that with everyone.

haha ADPiViolets...
 

...that is a great story!:) Loved it!